Gee, who's OBVIOUSLY, HAM-HANDEDLY missing from this screenplay? Hmm, lemme think a minute...
Posted on 07/11/2011 1:31:11 PM PDT by Immerito
It was one of those perfect nights here in Los Angeles. Ginger and her girlfriends had left, the hot tub was quiet, and the lights of downtown sparkled like Festivus-tree ornaments down the hill from my palatial pad in Echo Park. Only the occasional sound of gangbanger gunfire from Boyle Heights marred the stillness of the evening as I sat sipping my Jägermeister and contemplating the infinite void that my father, the sainted “Che” Kahane, had raised me to believe is my destiny. And then the phone rang.
“So listen, Dave,” said my agent, breathlessly. It wasn’t like her to be calling at this hour — heck, it wasn’t like any agent to be calling at this hour. As is well known, Hollywood observes strict business hours, 10 a.m. to 7 p.m., Pacific time, and if business can’t get done between those hours, it’s probably not worth doing. So this had to be big.
“This just might be your big chance so drop whatever it is you’re doing and fire up Final Draft, because we’ve got to hurry.”
I took this with a grain of salt. Hollywood is the land of hurry up and wait; everybody has to have everything yesterday, which means that all over this crazy town writers are even now tearing their hair out as they whip through spec drafts for their favorite producers while wondering how to make the rent — which, by the way, is too damn high. Then we turn in our work and wait months, if not years, to hear back. And, of course, the check is never in the mail.
(Excerpt) Read more at nationalreview.com ...
You forgot the Barf Alert.
Brilliant, absolutely brilliant. Is David Kahane married?
David Kahane appears to be a pseudonym. His real name is Michael Walsh. I have not found any information indicating he is married.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Walsh_%28author%29
Gee, who's OBVIOUSLY, HAM-HANDEDLY missing from this screenplay? Hmm, lemme think a minute...
I was kidding - I’m married. But I love his articles, and his book was great, too.
I was kidding - I’m married. But I love his articles, and his book was great, too.
Totally off-topic, but there was some conservative subtext in the Transformers movie.
Basically, Obama has a cameo in this movie, just to make sure we know it’s his administration. The bad guys set up their home base in Chicago, and actually use the phrase “The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few”. And when they make terroristic threats, the government buckles like a belt.
Also, the military is portrayed in a great light, with the exception of the Homeland Security bureaucrat.
So, do “we” win?
The terrorists perform a double-cross, which “we” were expecting and we whoop some tail:)
Rick Perry ping. Hilarious satire by Kahane (Walsh). He obviously thinks Governor Perry casts a big shadow on the race though.
Thanks for the ping!
OK, safe for the wee ones? Age 8.
I’m not sure. It’s a judgement call on your part. I probably wouldn’t have taken my son to see it when he was 8. There are some scenes where people get incinerated, there is an evil bird transformer that is kinda scary to me at least, and some Autobots get killed which made me a bit sad and I’m 35 years old.
OK - thanks!
I generally watch a flick B4 I take the grandkiddos. Looks like I saved some bucs all round.
THanks again!
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