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NASCAR Race Ends Early As Gas Gets Too Expensive For Anyone To Reach The Finish Line
The Babylon Bee ^
| October 25, 2021
| The Babylon Bee
Posted on 10/26/2021 7:48:56 PM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
KANSAS CITY, KS—It was a sad day for circle-driving fans this Sunday, as no drivers finished the race at the Kansas City Speedway. This was due to the fact that gas was simply too expensive for any racer to afford to reach the finish line.
“More circles! More circles!” chanted the crowd, but all the cars were stopped as their tanks ran out of gas, and no more circles were to be driven.
“I really wanted to finish driving the requisite number of circles,” said Kyle Larson, who was leading up until all the drivers quit. “We did some calculations during a pit stop and compared the cost of gas to the prize money, and it just wasn’t worth it. I feel like I let the fans down, but, hey, none of them were willing to chip in for gas.”
The fans did seem disappointed, and their “More circles!” chant switched to “Let’s go, Brandon!” even though whichever driver was Brandon seemed to be stopped as well.
Some drivers have asked NASCAR to compensate them for mileage driven, but Bob NASCAR, the CEO and founder of NASCAR, says they can’t do that, or they would go bankrupt. He has instead suggested that the drivers consider going electric.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
TOPICS: Business/Economy; Chit/Chat; Humor; Miscellaneous; Outdoors; Sports
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; gasoline; inflation; letsgobrandon; nascar; prices; satire
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
race fuel is close to 10 bucks a gallon here...
while I know it’s a joke I could see small dirt tracks reducing the number of laps.
2
posted on
10/26/2021 7:50:38 PM PDT
by
cableguymn
(We need a redneck in the white house.... But the fact checkers said thein story was false!)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
what do we want? MORE CIRCLES! when do we want them?? NOW!!!
3
posted on
10/26/2021 7:57:10 PM PDT
by
Chode
(there is no fall back position, there's no rally point, there is no LZ... we're on our own. #FJB)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
I wonder how long it will be before we do see electric car races. Surprised Musk isn’t doing them now
4
posted on
10/26/2021 7:59:56 PM PDT
by
MNJohnnie
(They would have abandon leftism to achieve sanity. Freeper Olog-hai)
To: Chode
5
posted on
10/26/2021 8:06:29 PM PDT
by
wastedyears
(The left would kill every single one of us and our families if they knew they could get away with it)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
I heard on the radio today that over half of the Iowa corn crop went to making Eth.
Make it stop.
Pure-gas for all.
6
posted on
10/26/2021 8:07:38 PM PDT
by
Paladin2
(Critical Marx Theory is The SOLUTION....)
To: Chode
“More circles!”, LOL
I love that the Babylon Bee is not afraid to make fun of everybody, lol.
To: MNJohnnie
I wonder how long it will be before we do see electric car races. Surprised Musk isn’t doing them nowFormula E Racing started in 2014.
8
posted on
10/26/2021 8:11:41 PM PDT
by
KarlInOhio
("Anti-fascist" is from the official name of the Berlin Wall: Anti-fascist Protection Barrier.)
To: FreedomVsControl
9
posted on
10/26/2021 8:11:50 PM PDT
by
Chode
(there is no fall back position, there's no rally point, there is no LZ... we're on our own. #FJB)
To: Paladin2
Brilliant, that’ll make gas $10/gal and we can all go electric.
10
posted on
10/26/2021 8:13:02 PM PDT
by
bigbob
To: wastedyears
Kool.
One could easily be kilt doin’ dat sorta chit...
11
posted on
10/26/2021 8:15:46 PM PDT
by
Paladin2
(Critical Marx Theory is The SOLUTION....)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
Wait until Nascar goes EV.
Let’s see ‘em replace a battery on one of them in 14 seconds.
They’re gonna need pitcrews with exeskeleton gear, no more jackmen or gasser uppers.
12
posted on
10/26/2021 8:16:43 PM PDT
by
NormsRevenge
(Semper Fi - Monthly Donors Rock!!! In CONgre$$ WE're Disgusted!!)
To: wastedyears
13
posted on
10/26/2021 8:16:44 PM PDT
by
Chode
(there is no fall back position, there's no rally point, there is no LZ... we're on our own. #FJB)
To: Chode
Justice for the CIRCLES! We demand circle justice!
14
posted on
10/26/2021 8:33:44 PM PDT
by
Wilhelm Tell
(True or False? This is not a tag line.)
To: Wilhelm Tell
15
posted on
10/26/2021 8:36:19 PM PDT
by
Chode
(there is no fall back position, there's no rally point, there is no LZ... we're on our own. #FJB)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
16
posted on
10/27/2021 12:07:55 AM PDT
by
aquila48
(Do not let them make you "care" ! Guilting you is how they control you. )
To: Chode
Could this be how circle jerks get started?
17
posted on
10/27/2021 4:06:42 AM PDT
by
LastDayz
(A blunt and brazen Texan. I will not be assimilated.)
To: LastDayz
18
posted on
10/27/2021 7:40:38 AM PDT
by
Chode
(there is no fall back position, there's no rally point, there is no LZ... we're on our own. #FJB)
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