Posted on 09/02/2008 11:09:18 PM PDT by Rushjr79
(Satire) The political world was thrown into chaos Tuesday night as a possible devastating scandal involving Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin and one of her children emerged. The New York Times is set to report in five front page articles on Wednesday morning that Piper, the Palin’s 6-year-old daughter, has been a very naughty girl, raising questions about Gov. Palin’s governing abilities. Among other shocking details, the Times is revealing that Piper once stayed up past bedtime and refused to eat her vegetables. Bernice Satanica, the head of Humorless Alliance for Grrls! (HAG), responded to the revelations by asking, “If she can’t get her 6-year-old to eat broccoli, can we really trust her to negotiate with Ahmadinejad? What kind of mother has ever had a child that disobeyed them?” Campbell Brown, a CNN anchor who also works as a spokesman for the Obama campaign, asked (read the rest at http://www.edwardsreport.com).
(Excerpt) Read more at edwardsreport.com ...
That Piper . . . such a rebel . . . lol. My blessings and prayers are with the Palin family during this massive attack. May God continue to guide and protect them all. Love the Parody!
Love the satire! Funny, fun, and refreshing.
Hey, are you sure that’s satire? I wouldn’t put any ridiculous thing past the lsm lately.
CNN - BREAKING NEWS: Palin Governor of State That Doesn’t Even Touch the Other States
Wolf Blitzer: It is a wonder that the McCain camp could pick someone so out of touch, so inexperienced with Continental America.
(Unidentified Pundit): Yeah, it makes you wonder if McCain vetted her at all.
Supposedly, some liberal “blogger” has obtained photos off the name PALIN written in a yellow substance outside of Santa’s Workshop at the North Pole.
Funny stuff! :-)
The way the moonbat lefties jump on anything to build a scandal it might have been wise to create some outlandish fake ones for them to discover...then make them look extremely foolish when proven wrong.
It’s the sort of thing best done by a lone operator, so that no one will blab.
lol “(aka nude)”
Urinalysis reveals it is Barack Obama's, but the handwriting is Deval Patrick's.
That’s a 10.
HA!
There is solid evidence that Sarah Palin may have been fully naked (aka nude) at certain times during her term as Governor, may have worn scandalous lingerie at other points, and may have even engaged in wild sex acts in private that would be positively scandalous in public. Although the full details are still unavailable, it’s come to light that Sarah Palin repeatedly exploited a blue-collar Eskimo worker for her own private amusement in the bedroom, and that she had sex with him on at least four separate occasions. It’s also well-known in Alaska that Sarah Palin got pregnant by a young snowmobile racer (see photo at right). (The snowmobiler openly admits he is the father of Palin’s child. Palin claims her husband “Todd” is the father.)
The allegations don’t stop there. In the course of our investigations, we have uncovered that there are very credible allegations of topless dancing, moose-tipping, mooning, miscegenation, murder, Mormonism, racketeering, racism, favoritism, flatulence, “Fairbanks hot plates,” goobery, global warming, oral sex, orgies, onanism, Catholicism, conspiracy, carbon emissions, corruption, cronyism, cover-ups, climate change, cohabitation, cornhole, usury, short-sheeting, smuggling, satan worship, Santaria (aka “voodoo”), infidelity, whistle-blowing, animal sex (including bestiality), astigmatism, abortion, prostitution, polyamory, peeing in the snow, papism, pornographic (aka “porn” or “sex”) videos, embezzlement, bribery, battery, barratry, bigotry, buggery, backroom dealing, nepotism, nihilism, nudity, dildos, and various gay / lesbian activity (i.e., sodomy) taking place in Alaska, the very state Sarah Palin promised to clean up.
There are credible claims that Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, Angelina Jolie and Pat Buchanan have each visited Sarah Palin’s state on at least one occasion—and engaged in who knows what sort of illicit and/or racist behavior while they were there. The Pat Buchanan allegations are particularly disturbing, owing to the fact that the Alaska governor had full knowledge of Buchanan’s travel plans and allowed Buchanan safe passage into and out of Alaska without even detaining or questioning him. Some claim that Buchanan was even granted “protection” by Alaska state police and local law enforcement. If any state or local law enforcement officials made any formal requests for authorization to capture or kill Pat Buchanan, such requests fell on deaf ears, and were very likely suppressed at the very highest levels of government. Was this the real reason Michael Wooten and Walter Monegan fell out of favor with the Ice Queen? Were they threatening to blow the whistle? I suspect this is just the tip of the iceberg.
Wolf Blitzer: It is a wonder that the McCain camp could pick someone so out of touch, so inexperienced with Continental America.
(Unidentified Pundit): Yeah, it makes you wonder if McCain vetted her at all.
Umm Wolf: Obama's from Hawaii. (gulp!)
It’s not the pregnancy we object to.
It’s the premarital sex.
We don’t like to see premarital sex glorified. We don’t like to see minor girls, or their babies vilified.
Ponder the difference. It’s a little tough to grasp, but it’s there.
...or then again would we ask how many abortions Chelsea has had if any, and what type of birth control method has she employed both as a teen and an adult?
They attribute the worst to conservatives and say that we need to stay out of their vaginas...
But they intrusively seek to investigate all emissions from Gov. Palin’s!
Hypocrites to the ‘nth degree!
As I recall GB senior wouldn’t eat his brocolli either.
“We don’t like to see premarital sex glorified. We don’t like to see minor girls, or their babies vilified.”
So how should the press have handled it? Should Palin’s daughter have given a speech saying she regretted the premarital sex and is now against it?
Well done little piece of satire.
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