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Has Bacon Been Banned From the White House?
The Palookaville Post ^ | May 2, 2013 | The Paperboy

Posted on 05/02/2013 12:41:59 PM PDT by onyx

Friends and associates of President Barack Hussein Obama who are frequent visitors to the White House have noticed that a certain food item has been removed from the kitchen, and has not been available for some time.

Bacon.

Yes bacon, a food that is loved by 97.5% of all Americans is no longer on the menu for visitors to Obama’s kitchen, and has been quietly banned. No one is sure when it all happened, but bacon has disappeared from the White House.

Press secretary Art Carney, who often dines with President Obama during late night and early morning cover-up meetings, confirmed the abscence of the crispy pork product, saying, “I remember bacon… that was a long time ago.”

Hillary Rodham Clinton, who is currently under a doctor’s care for health issues dealing with her brain, could not recall the last time she shared bacon with the President, and joked, “At this point what does it matter,” while pointing to her ever expanding waistline.

Rodham Clinton, a Wellesley College graduate and former lawyer at the Rose Law firm, real estate investor with Whitewater Development, First Lady of Arkansas, First Lady of the United States, U.S. Senator from New York and U.S. Secretary of State is most famous in Washington D.C. for throwing lavish Arkansas style pig roasting parties at the White House during the 1990′s for her homesick husband Bill Clinton, in an attempt to make “Bubba” feel more at home.

“When George Bush was elected and his family moved into the White House, they had to wait a full week for all the Clinton pork grease to be removed from the kitchen and barbecue grills,” said a White House maintenance worker. “Now my job cleaning the White House stoves, ovens and grills is much easier since pork is no longer served.”

Tha Palookaville Post has learned that not all forms of bacon have been banned from Obama’s White House, and over 108 tons of turkey bacon was consumed by the Obama family and Democrat visitors last year, which helps to verify the old Muslim adage, “You are what you eat.”

Obama family doctors have confirmed that no one in the family is allergic to pork, and the President’s advisers don’t believe he is hiding the hatred of pork products to avoid the same problems that President George H.W. Bush had after he openly expressed his distaste for broccoli.

So without President Obama coming out and addressing the pork issue with the American people, the world may never know why bacon has been banned from the first family’s table.

(If you are concerned about the White House bacon ban and its effects on the U.S. pork industry, please call the White House at 202-456-1111, and ask President Obama to explain his aggressive ban on bacon.)

Zeke


TOPICS: Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: baconbanned; whitehouse
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1 posted on 05/02/2013 12:41:59 PM PDT by onyx
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To: onyx
Has Bacon Been Banned From the White House?

Sure. The muzzie 0bama doesn't eat pork. I'd love to see the Pork Producers call his bluff and force him to attend a convention.

2 posted on 05/02/2013 12:45:17 PM PDT by The Sons of Liberty (It's not "GUN CONTROL"! It's "PEOPLE CONTROL"!)
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To: onyx

Maybe there are a lot of Jewish people in the WH? Do they have hot dogs and ribs on any of the menus? Is the food Kosher?


3 posted on 05/02/2013 12:46:03 PM PDT by stuartcr ("I have habits that are older than the people telling me they're bad for me.")
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To: onyx

..he still hides a few slices under his prayer rug


4 posted on 05/02/2013 12:46:23 PM PDT by Doogle (USAF.68-73..8th TFW Ubon Thailand..never store a threat you should have eliminated))
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To: onyx

First American patriots were banned.(replaced by Marxists)

Then Christians were banned(replaced by Muslims and Marxists)

At the White House, you can get a free copy of Das Kapital, or the Koran, but not a BLT!


5 posted on 05/02/2013 12:48:06 PM PDT by stephenjohnbanker
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To: onyx

Are they trying to say faggots don’t eat pork? ...Or maybe it’s just Islamist faggots.


6 posted on 05/02/2013 12:48:17 PM PDT by pallis
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To: onyx
Press secretary Art Carne

Heeee Heeeeeee Heeee!


7 posted on 05/02/2013 12:48:40 PM PDT by Red_Devil 232 (VietVet - USMC All Ready On The Right? All Ready On The Left? All Ready On The Firing Line!)
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To: Jet Jaguar; NorwegianViking; ExTexasRedhead; HollyB; FromLori; EricTheRed_VocalMinority; ...

The list, Ping

Let me know if you would like to be on or off the ping list

http://www.nachumlist.com/


8 posted on 05/02/2013 12:48:51 PM PDT by Nachum (The Obama "List" at www.nachumlist.com)
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To: onyx

By the time he leaves office he’ll be shouting Allahu Akbar every chance he gets.


9 posted on 05/02/2013 12:49:04 PM PDT by E. Pluribus Unum (Islam is a religion of peace, and Moslems reserve the right to behead anyone who says otherwise.)
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To: onyx
and over 108 tons of turkey bacon was consumed by the Obama family and Democrat visitors last year

WTF?...they hiding it with the bullets?

10 posted on 05/02/2013 12:49:18 PM PDT by Doogle (USAF.68-73..8th TFW Ubon Thailand..never store a threat you should have eliminated))
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To: onyx
muslims photo: No Muslims no_muslims.jpg
11 posted on 05/02/2013 12:49:46 PM PDT by Snickering Hound
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To: onyx

Anyone who does not like the smell of bacon conking on a camp fire (or on anything or in anything) is a terrorist.


12 posted on 05/02/2013 12:49:58 PM PDT by svcw (If you are dead when your heart stops, why aren't you alive when it starts.)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum; All

Wow. What’s sad is I thought this was actually real until I read the paragraph mentioning Hillary.


13 posted on 05/02/2013 12:50:57 PM PDT by rwfromkansas ("Carve your name on hearts, not marble." - C.H. Spurgeon)
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To: onyx

No Bacon for you!

14 posted on 05/02/2013 12:56:30 PM PDT by RedMDer (May we always be happy and may our enemies always know it. - Sarah Palin, 10-18-2010)
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To: onyx

15 posted on 05/02/2013 12:56:48 PM PDT by Wyrd bið ful aræd (Gone Galt, 11/07/12----No king but Christ! Don't tread on me!)
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Support Free Republic.

16 posted on 05/02/2013 12:59:20 PM PDT by RedMDer (May we always be happy and may our enemies always know it. - Sarah Palin, 10-18-2010)
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To: onyx

When Obama had his “surprise” visit to a cafe in Portland known for pea soup, one of his people called ahead to make sure there wouldn’t be any ham in his bowl of soup.

Only a Muslim wouldn’t want ham in their pea soup.


17 posted on 05/02/2013 1:00:08 PM PDT by SeaHawkFan
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To: onyx
Is there evidence that Obama has ever eaten pork? I know he's been to some BBQ restaurants for photo ops but don't know what he ate there.

I searched and found nothing except for this one photo op where he ate a pork sandwich. This may be satire or the sandwich could easily have been faked. I want to see him chowing down on a big rack of ribs, pig ears or pig feet so we know for sure...

http://blogs.sacurrent.com/index.php/obama-to-eat-pork-sandwhich-to-prove-hes-not-muslim/

18 posted on 05/02/2013 1:01:03 PM PDT by varyouga
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To: The Sons of Liberty

hehe

Obama has indeed been in the company of the head of the Iowa Pork Producers chowing down on pork chops.


19 posted on 05/02/2013 1:02:02 PM PDT by jjotto ("Ya could look it up!")
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To: onyx

The good part of this is that there would be more pork for the rest of us.


20 posted on 05/02/2013 1:02:22 PM PDT by mountainlion (Live well for those that did not make it back.)
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