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USO Canteen FReeper Style ~ Military Jokes & Humor ~ November 18 2002
68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub and FRiends of the Canteen

Posted on 11/17/2002 11:43:07 PM PST by 68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub

Military Jokes & Humor

Camouflage Uniform Wear Policies


MARINES: Work uniform, to be worn only during training and in field situations.

ARMY: Will wear it anytime, anywhere.

NAVY: Will not wear camouflage uniforms, they do not camouflage you on a ship.
(Ship Captains will make every effort to attempt to explain this to sailors.)

AIR FORCE: Will defeat the purpose of camouflage uniforms by putting blue and silver chevrons
and colorful squadron patches all over them.

An Army General, a Marine General and a Navy Admiral are all sitting around discussing whose's service is better and whose troops are the bravest?
The Admiral (well into his second or third ice tea) announces to the group, " My SEALS are the BEST in the world and to prove it I'll have one do the impossiple" as he raeches for the phone.
Well the other two commanders are in an uproar and each one promply calls for his best soldier.
When all three representives have arrived, the Admiral states "Since it was my idea, I'm first" and turning to the SEAL, he says " I want you to go down that cliff, swim across those 10 miles of shark infested waters, climb up that shear cliff and return with with 2 bird eggs... unbroken of course.".
The SEAL (being the highly trained soldier that he is) turned runnig towards the cliff. After performing a triple-linddy into the water, the SEAL swam across the 10 miles (all the while beating off sharks with his bare hands) and reaching the far cliff, he began climbing. Near the top of the cliff, he grabs the two eggs and starts back down (all the time, fighting off mean birds). Upon reaching the sea he swims back across (once again fighting off sharks) and climbs back up the first cliff. He then runs back over to the Admiral and hands him the 2 unbroken eggs.
The Marine General says "that wasn't nothing," and turning to the Force Recon Marine he says " I want you to go down that cliff, swim across those waters, climb that other cliff,then move across the 4 miles of unmapped jungle and bring me back 2 eggs from the mountain on the other side of the jungle."
And with that the Force Recon moved-out. Traveling down the cliff, swimming across the sea, climbing the far cliff, moving through the jungle and upon reaching the 2 eggs, he heads back (all the while fighting off lions, tigers, bears, sharks, and mean birds). Finally reaching the General, the Marine hands him the eggs.
The Army General then says "Very nice gentlemen, but heres true bravery" and turning towards his BEST (an Airborne Infantryman), he says "I want you to go down that cliff, across that sea, up the far cliff, thru the 4 miles of unmapped jungle, over the mountain and bring me back 2 eggs from the forest on the other side."

The Paratrooper looks at the General, then the cliff, and again back to the General, where he says "SCREW YOU SIR!", renders a proper hand salute and walks away.


The General turn towards the other two (both with their jaws on the table) and says
"Now gentlemen, thats BRAVERY."


TOPICS: Activism/Chapters; Announcements; Extended News; Foreign Affairs; Free Republic; Government; Miscellaneous; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: michaeldobbs; usocanteen
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To: Kathy in Alaska
Thank you Kathy
51 posted on 11/18/2002 9:04:19 AM PST by Soaring Feather
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To: 68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub; bentfeather; GatorGirl; 4TheFlag; GooberDoll; zip; radu; MoJo2001; ...
Bless This House hummed along with this morning, twice because I love this song for our USO Canteen, and Prayer of Protection said for all who enter the USO Canteen Freeper Style, including our troops, our veterans, their families and our allies. Welcome to all who come to honor our troops, for whom this USO Canteen was created.

A PRAYER OF PROTECTION

The light of God surround you

The love of God enfold you

The power of God protect you

The presence of God watch over you

Wherever you are, God is,

And all is well.

Amen.

Wherever you are, God is, And all is well.

52 posted on 11/18/2002 9:05:59 AM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: bentfeather
Good morning, ms feather. Thank you for the blessing to help start the day for the troops Canteen.
53 posted on 11/18/2002 9:08:41 AM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: Kathy in Alaska; Severa
Good day from Maine. I've done my run in orange vest and hat(Yes,and fleece sweats too and shoes). I go to the gym in a while. It was too nasty this weekend to drive so I double train on Monday like a weekend warrior. I have no jokes. but I always liked Humor In Uniform from Readers' Digest. I may search for this.
54 posted on 11/18/2002 9:16:50 AM PST by larryjohnson
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To: Kathy in Alaska; All
Wherever you are, God is, And all is well.
55 posted on 11/18/2002 9:26:25 AM PST by Soaring Feather
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To: larryjohnson
"I have no jokes. but I always liked Humor In Uniform from Readers' Digest. I may search for this."

I'm in the same boat as you. That's an excellent idea, larry. Humor in Uniform is a good idea. Good hunting. Our troops need any jokes we can find. I'll look at break time too.

56 posted on 11/18/2002 9:32:01 AM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: larryjohnson
Ways to Amuse Yourself During A Military Urinalysis


57 posted on 11/18/2002 9:32:32 AM PST by sweetliberty
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To: 68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub
Here's one from the haze-gray crowd:


Cannon Balls In the heyday of sailing ships, all war ships and many freighters carried iron cannons. Those cannon fired round iron cannon balls. It was necessary to keep a good supply near the cannon. But how to prevent them from rolling about the deck?

The best storage method devised was a square based pyramid with one ball on top, resting on four resting on nine which rested on sixteen. Thus, a supply of 30 cannon balls could be stacked in a small area right next to the cannon.

There was only one problem -- how to prevent the bottom layer from sliding/rolling from under the others? The solution was a metal plate called a "Monkey" with 16 round indentations. But if this plate was made of iron, the iron balls would quickly rust to it. The solution to the rusting problem was to make "Brass Monkeys."

Few landlubbers realize that brass contracts much more and much faster than iron when chilled. Consequently, when the temperature dropped too far, the brass indentations would shrink so much that the iron cannon balls would come right off the monkey.

Thus, it was quite literally, "Cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey!"

58 posted on 11/18/2002 9:33:19 AM PST by jettester
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To: Kathy in Alaska; bentfeather; 68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub; All
Good morning!

While talking to a potential recruit, the military recruiter said, "Exactly what kind of job are you looking for in the military?"

The high school kid said, "I'm looking for something with an enlistment bonus of about $20,000, where I won't have to work too hard, and won't have to deploy overseas."

The recruiter said, "What if I could hook you up with a skill that allowed you to come straight in as an E-7, where you'll only work weekdays, and you can have the base of your choice and stay there as long as you want?"

The young recruit sat up straight and said, "WOW! Are you kidding?"

The recruiter replied, "Yeah, but you started it."
59 posted on 11/18/2002 9:38:13 AM PST by southerngrit
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To: 68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub
Some Aviation fun (unknown sources):

1. Blue water Navy truism; there are more planes in the ocean than there are submarines in the sky.

2. If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it's probably a helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe.

3. Navy carrier pilots to Air Force pilots: Flaring is like squatting to pee.

4. When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash.

5. Without ammunition the USAF would be just another expensive flying club.

6. What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; If ATC screws up, the pilot dies.

7. Never trade luck for skill.

8. The three most common expressions (or famous last words) in aviation are: "Why is it doing that?” "Where are we?" and "Oh S#!+!"

9. Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers.

10. Progress in airline flying; now a flight attendant can get a pilot pregnant.

11. Airspeed, altitude or brains. Two are always needed to successfully complete the flight.

12. A smooth landing is mostly luck; two in a row is all luck; three in a row is prevarication.

13. I remember when sex was safe and flying was dangerous.

14. Mankind has a perfect record in aviation; we never left one up there!

15. Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a flight bag for the purpose of storing dead batteries.

16. Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a person on the ground incapable of understanding it or doing anything about it.

17. When a flight is proceeding incredibly well, something was forgotten.

18. Just remember, if you crash because of weather, your funeral will be held on a sunny day.

19. Advice given to RAF pilots during W.W.II. When a prang (crash) seems inevitable, endeavor to strike the softest, cheapest object in the vicinity as slowly and gently as possible.

20. The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it can just barely kill you. (Attributed to Max Stanley, Northrop test pilot)

21. A pilot who doesn't have any fear probably isn't flying his plane to its maximum. (Jon McBride, astronaut)

22. If you're faced with a forced landing, fly the thing as far into the crash as possible. (Bob Hoover - renowned aerobatic and test pilot)

23. If an airplane is still in one piece, don't cheat on it; ride the bastard down. (Ernest K. Gann, author & aviator)

24. Though I Fly Through the Valley of Death I Shall Fear No Evil For I am at 80,000 Feet and Climbing. (Sign over the entrance to the SR-71 operating location Kadena, Japan).

25. You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3. (Paul F. Crickmore - test pilot)

26. Never fly in the same cockpit with someone braver than you.

27. There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime. (Sign over squadron ops desk at Davis-Monthan AFB, AZ, 1970).

28. The three best things in life are a good landing, a good orgasm, and a good bowel movement. The night carrier landing is one of the few opportunities in life where you get to experience all three at the same time. (Author unknown, but someone who's been there)

29. "Now I know what a dog feels like watching TV." (A DC-9 captain trainee attempting to check out on the 'glass cockpit' of an A-320).

30. If something hasn't broken on your helicopter, it's about to.

60 posted on 11/18/2002 9:40:21 AM PST by jettester
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To: southerngrit; All
Good Morning to you.

ROTFLOL
61 posted on 11/18/2002 9:43:28 AM PST by Soaring Feather
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To: Kathy in Alaska

62 posted on 11/18/2002 9:46:29 AM PST by mhking
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To: Gamecock
gee, i thought this was a place for JOKES.

those are each TRUE!

free dixie,sw

63 posted on 11/18/2002 9:52:56 AM PST by stand watie
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To: bentfeather
*grin*

We still tease my nephew about the longlegged blonde recruiter in the red Mustang who picked him up and drove him to the Marine recruiting office. He's still waiting for her to return his call, and he's been out of the service for 4 years now!
64 posted on 11/18/2002 9:55:25 AM PST by southerngrit
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To: HiJinx; All
HUMOR

TWO SEABEE BUDDIES AND I arrived in Sydney, Australia,
after combat duty in Vietnam. We rented the flashiest
civvies we could afford from the concession stand at the
military center and set out to explore the city.
Our first stop was a popular hotel bar. As we
shouldered our way through the throng, the bartender boomed
out, "Eh there, mates clear a way for the Yanks." The crowd
parted, and the bartender quickly set before us three pints
of Sydney's best. I inquired how he knew we were Americans.
"How'd I know you was Yanks?" he said. "I may not have
seen you before, but your suits've been here a dozen
times!"

--Contributed to "Humor In Uniform" by J. F. Leahy
Provided courtesy of Reader's Digest (http://www.rd.com).
65 posted on 11/18/2002 10:22:03 AM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: Kathy in Alaska; All
Another one from RD Humor in Uniform. I'd love to credit it to the Colonel, but I don't remember his name...

So, anyway, a retired Colonel who flew fighters in Korea and VietNam was sitting on the couch with his wife one evening watching TV when a show came on about fighter pilots.

He saw one of his buddies and commented about the guy to his wife. She said, "It must be nice to see how your friends are doing, now." He replied, "I just wish I didn't have to watch The History Channel to see 'em again."
66 posted on 11/18/2002 10:42:01 AM PST by HiJinx
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To: leadpenny
"Marines - Mickey's big hand is on 12, and his little hand is on 3."

LOL! OK, leadpenny, will the Marines respond. Too funny and thanks.

67 posted on 11/18/2002 10:54:37 AM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: Mo1
LOL, Mo! Coughing could definitely be a problem. Hope you are having a good Monday.
68 posted on 11/18/2002 11:06:01 AM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: bentfeather; Mo1; MeeknMing; leadpenny; HiJinx; mhking; southerngrit; larryjohnson; Severa; ...
From Reader's Digest Humor in Uniform

A FEW MONTHS after Tom and I were married during World War
II, he was shipped off to Pearl Harbor. In one of his first
letters, he wrote, "I'm going to have a Navy battleship
tattooed on my chest." Instead of pleading, I answered
simply, "Send me a picture of your tattoo, and I'll have a
duplicate put on my chest." We have been married for 51
years. Neither of us has a tattoo.
+++

A drill sergeant ordered two young female recruits to
paint a room in the barracks, stressing that they not
get any paint on their uniforms. Doubtful they could
avoid ruining their clothes, the women locked the door,
stripped naked and painted in the nude. After about an
hour they heard a knock at the door. "Who is it?" asked
one of the women.

"Blind man," came the reply.

Seeing no harm in letting a blind man in, they opened
the door.

"Wow, what knockouts!" the man said with surprise.
"Now, where do you want these blinds?"

Top of Page
69 posted on 11/18/2002 11:12:35 AM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: bentfeather
"Stepping Stones"

Misty monitor alert. Thank you, ms feather, for this beautiful posting.

70 posted on 11/18/2002 11:16:07 AM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: Kathy in Alaska
So far my day is good .. but soon the kiddies will be home from school and .. groan .. it's homework duty

Hope all is well with you

71 posted on 11/18/2002 11:19:21 AM PST by Mo1
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To: Aeronaut
Good day Aeronaut and Otto. Thanks guys for your faithful daily flyover of protection.
72 posted on 11/18/2002 11:22:49 AM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: 68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub; SAMWolf; AntiJen; MistyCA; SassyMom; kneezles; Victoria Delsoul; ...
Been MIA for a few days with 'puter problems and a Honey-do list about a block long, but I wanted to thank you for your words, "Welcome Back" the other night here in the ol' Canteen.

You wouldn't believe the messages and pings I've been getting with aplologies for the ORGANIZED treatment doled out for thinking outside the box and being critical of some of the operations of the Canteen since late last spring.

I gotta tell ya, man, the treatment I received in the sixties while serving and when I got out was a cakewalk compared to the attacks that have taken place over the last 8-9 months - starting from the top down.

To all who expressed apologies, I thank you.

73 posted on 11/18/2002 11:30:51 AM PST by Diver Dave
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To: JohnHuang2
If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?
If people from Poland are called "Poles," why aren't people from Holland called "Holes?
Why do we say something is out of whack? What's in whack?
Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
Why do women wear evening gowns to nightclubs? Shouldn't they be wearing night gowns?
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts," and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.
When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?
Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person that drives a race car not called a racist?
Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make terrible?
Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?
"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?
Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe them but if they tell you a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?
If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
What hair color do they put on the drivers licenses of bald men?
I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older, then it dawned on me, they're cramming for their final exam.
I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on postage stamps so the mailmen could look for them while they deliver the mail?
How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?
If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
No one ever says "It's only a game," when their team is winning.
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
74 posted on 11/18/2002 12:09:55 PM PST by B4Ranch
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To: 68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub
Now this will warm your heart.

Little Melissa comes home from first grade and tells her father that they learned about the history of Valentine's Day. "Since Valentine's Day is for a Christian saint and we're Jewish," she asks, "will God get mad at me for giving someone a valentine?"

Melissa's father thinks a bit, then says "No, I don't think God would get mad. Who do you want to give a valentine to?" "Osama Bin Laden," she says. "Why Osama Bin Laden," her father asks in shock. "Well," she says, "I thought that if a little American Jewish girl could have enough love to give Osama a valentine, he might start to think that maybe we're not all bad, and maybe start loving people a little bit. And if other kids saw what I did and sent valentines to Osama, he'd love everyone a lot. And then he'd start going all over the place to tell everyone how much he loved them and how he didn't hate anyone anymore." Her father's heart swells and he looks at his daughter with newfound pride.

"Melissa, that's the most wonderful thing I've ever heard."

"I know," Melissa says, "and once that gets him out in the open, Army Rangers could blow his butt off."

75 posted on 11/18/2002 12:16:59 PM PST by HoustonCurmudgeon
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To: 68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub
aaarrgghh.. repost from 11/16...(see msg text)

I'm having some difficulty keeping up... is there a new canteen each am? And if so, when do we traditionally say Good Morning? I am a new FReeper and after I saw the canteen t'other day, I just want to scan, see what our services have to say, and toss in an irreverent comment or two. I appreciate the work you put into this post, since I see your moniker on so much of it and I have read how you moderate them all. If it helps for our folk in uniform out there, a whole lot of us day-to-day citizen types who look around and just say, "thank God for our guys and gals in uniform who do so much more than we can!"

Tom and Lily

76 posted on 11/18/2002 12:35:17 PM PST by freedumb2003
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To: Dubya
Powerful post! I'm crying too!
77 posted on 11/18/2002 12:48:17 PM PST by freedumb2003
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To: 68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub
For some of our Jarhead buddies:

Pope John Paul dies of old age and finds himself at the gates of Heaven at 0300. He knocks on the gate and a very sleepy-eyed Navy Chief opens the gate and asks, "Wadda you want?" "I'm the recently deceased Pope and have done 63 years of godly works and thought I should check in here."


The watchman checks his clipboard and says, "I ain't got no orders for you here, just bring your stuff and we'll sort this out in the morning."

They go to an old W.W.II receiving barracks, 3rd deck, open squad bay. All the bottom racks are taken and all empty lockers have no doors. The Pope stows his gear under a rack and climbs into an upper bunk. The next morning he awakens to sounds of cheering and clapping. He goes to the window and sees a flashy Jaguar convertible parading down the clouds from the golden headquarters building. The cloud walks are lined with saints and angels cheering and tossing confetti. In the back seat of the Jaguar sits a Marine First Sergeant in dress blues, his Gold Parachute Wings glistening on his chest, a cigar in his mouth, a bottle of San Miguel in one hand, and his other arm around a voluptuous blonde Angel with a magnificent halo.


This disturbs the Pope and he runs downstairs to the Master-at-Arms shack and says, "Hey, what gives? You put me, the Pope, with 63 years of godly deeds, in an open bay barracks, while this Marine who must've committed every sin known and unknown to man is staying in a mansion on the hill and getting a hero's welcome. How can this be?

The Master at Arms calmly looks up and says, "We get a Pope up here every 40 or 50 years, but we ain't never had a Marine First Sergeant before."

78 posted on 11/18/2002 12:50:33 PM PST by jettester
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To: freedumb2003

I will never forget the day we hit the beach in the Shetland Islands in 78. We were onboard the LaMoure County, LST 1194.

We were inbad weather for the last 2 weeks, rockin and rolling all over the place, and we were so glad to get ashore!

Up at about 5 or so, embarked on a landing craft, a mid size one, we set out for the beach on the Ura Firth.

We set up on a mountain of peat, you cant see it from this pic, but we set up our radios and waited for the ships to give us control of the skies. (I was an Air Controller, MOS 7242, an Air Winger that went out in the field for EVERY grunt operation...but we slept in shelter halves or GP tents, not holes.)

So anways, after we set up our stuff, we were standing around waiting for the word to start operating, and we all were rocking back and forth just like we were on the boat!

No Kidding, all 8 or 9 of us standing there, swaying back and forth just like on the LST, as if the waves were rocking us, only we were on land!

It was late September or so, about 40°, raininng, and windy, about 10 - 20 MPH winds. Miserable weather.

We operated for about 18 hours, till midninght or so, when we got the word to break camp and head back to the ship. It was welcome news!

We broke camp, packed up, got on the landing craft, and then headed to the ship, to find out the waves were too big to let us marry up to the boat! In the landing craft, we were in swells that brought us higher than the deck of the LST at the crest of the wave!

The ship had to head into the inlet, the URa Firth, to let us marry up and get back on the ship.

I will never forget how we were so eager to get off the boat 24 hours before, and so eager and happy to get back on the boat again 24 hours later!

Those poles you see are frame sections for our frame tent that we humped up the hill to the top of the peat bog, about a 2.5 mile walk at most, full pack,no rifles!, just frame sections.

79 posted on 11/18/2002 12:54:16 PM PST by RaceBannon
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To: bentfeather

80 posted on 11/18/2002 12:56:54 PM PST by RaceBannon
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To: 68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub

81 posted on 11/18/2002 12:59:33 PM PST by RaceBannon
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To: RaceBannon
Powerfull post Buddy.
82 posted on 11/18/2002 1:03:29 PM PST by Dubya
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To: BeforeISleep

83 posted on 11/18/2002 1:06:56 PM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: piasa
Thanks, piasa, for the wonderful link.
84 posted on 11/18/2002 1:08:40 PM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: Kathy in Alaska; All
From Reader's Digest Humor in Uniform


Whoooooo hooooooo!!!!

ROTFLOLLMHO!!!!!!
85 posted on 11/18/2002 1:09:52 PM PST by Soaring Feather
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To: MeeknMing
Thanks, Meekie, for my morning cup of hot chocolate.
86 posted on 11/18/2002 1:10:06 PM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: bentfeather; Mo1; MeeknMing; leadpenny; HiJinx; mhking; southerngrit; larryjohnson; Severa

021114-N-1328C-509 At sea aboard USS Theodore Roosevelt (CVN 71) Nov. 14, 2002 -- Hose teams made up of Sailors assigned to the hangar bay move into position to fight a fire during a General Quarters (GQ) drill aboard the aircraft carrier. Theodore Roosevelt is underway in the Atlantic Ocean conducting flight deck qualifications. U.S. Navy photo by Photographer’s Mate Chief Eric A. Clement. (RELEASED) View

87 posted on 11/18/2002 1:15:02 PM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: RaceBannon
OKEY DOKEY

LOL
88 posted on 11/18/2002 1:15:30 PM PST by Soaring Feather
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To: Kathy in Alaska
At sea aboard USS Theodore Roosevelt (CVN 71) Nov. 14, 2002


WOW
89 posted on 11/18/2002 1:19:07 PM PST by Soaring Feather
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To: 68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub; bentfeather; Mo1; MeeknMing; leadpenny; HiJinx; mhking; southerngrit; ...

021112-N-4374S-020 Central Command Area of Responsibility (Nov. 12, 2002) -- U.S. Marines assigned to 2nd Battalion, 2nd Marines, Echo Company, 24th Marine Expeditionary Unit (MEU) Special Operations Capable (SOC) disembark from an Amphibious Assault Vehicle (AAV) to conduct a live fire training exercise. Marines from the 24th MEU (SOC) are on a regularly scheduled deployment conducting exercises in the United States Central Command Area of Responsibility (AOR) in support of Operation Enduring Freedom. U.S. Navy photo by Photographer’s Mate 2nd Class Michael Sandberg. (RELEASED)

90 posted on 11/18/2002 1:20:23 PM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: All

CLEBE McCLARY, USMC (Ret.), holds up his Bible with the Marine Corps "Semper Fi" insignia on the cover while addressing last month's Ocean City Prayer Dinner.

91 posted on 11/18/2002 1:22:14 PM PST by Dubya
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To: All
Prayer Dinner Unifies Resort

By RANDY WALTER

CLEBE McCLARY, USMC (Ret.), holds up his Bible with the Marine Corps "Semper Fi" insignia on the cover while addressing last month's Ocean City Prayer Dinner.

As the first Salisbury Mayor's Prayer Luncheon prepared to welcome Flight 93 widow Lisa Beamer, whose husband Todd on Sept. 11 uttered the now-famous words "Let's roll," Ocean City held its first Mayor's Prayer Dinner last month.

The resort event's patriotic theme was not one of unthinking devotion to the American lifestyle, but one of unswerving devotion to the God of our fathers.

The evening included a recitation of historical events which corroborated America's Christian heritage.

Navy Chaplain Stephen Parker read the moving account, "Where was God on 9/11?" God was with those who died on the ill-fated flights, the firefighters and police officers who responded, and the innocent civilians and military personnel who lost their lives. He was with everyone who experienced shock and grief. And to those who were not taken on Sept. 11, He still calls them to "seek Me now, while I may be found."

Cong. Wayne Gilchrest commended two former POW's from World War II and the Korean War who were in the audience. The evening's main speaker, Marine Lt. Clebe McClary (Ret.), introduced the family of Marine Staff Sgt. Walter "Trae" Cohee, III, of Mardela Springs, who died on Jan. 20 in Operation Enduring Freedom.

Del. Norman Conway recognized the Maryland families of two men lost in the attack on the World Trade Center, Rich Caproni and Joe Maggitti.

Two members of the Fire Department of New York attended the dinner to honor Father Mychal Judge, the chaplain who was killed by falling debris on Sept. 11 while administering last rites to a fallen firefighter. His sister, Ocean Pines resident Dympna Jessich, participated in a memorial presentation on "Father Mike."

In his brief but powerful message, Clebe McClary told about his experiences in Vietnam.

He had been a high school and college coach who enlisted after witnessing the desecration of an American flag. While on a reconnaissance mission deep in enemy territory, his outfit was ambushed. When an enemy suicide squad charged his position, a satchel charge detonated next to him. Clebe lost his left arm and left eye.

He spent 30 months in the hospital and underwent 34 major surgeries. While on leave, Clebe went to hear one of his heroes, former New York Yankee Bobby Richardson.

One of the speakers at the meeting said, "There are two kinds of fools in this world: A fool for Christ and a fool for others. Whose fool are you?"

Clebe assessed his life. "I knew that night whose fool I'd been," he concluded.

As an athlete, Clebe never indulged in bad habits. People at the church his family attended thought he was a fine Christian young man. But clean living and going to church did not fill the vacuum in his heart.

That night, he and his wife "knelt, prayed, confessed our sins in a very personal way, and invited the Lord Jesus into our hearts. What we found was the real joy, the real life, the real peace that so many are searching for. It comes from a personal relationship with a Living Savior."

Since then, his story of determination and faith has encouraged people around the world.

"There's hope for America tonight," he declared. Referring to the education and affluence of Americans, he said our hope is not in learning or earning, but will be in turning. He cited II Chronicles 7:14­

"If My people, who are called by My name, will humble themselves and pray and seek My face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land."

As he encouraged his audience to follow the same course which helped him overcome adversity, he related an illustration used by evangelist Billy Sunday. He described life as a baseball diamond. First base represents a personal relationship with Jesus. Second is church membership; third is service to others; and home plate is heaven.

A batter hit the ball long and began rounding the bases. The fielder played the ball off the left field fence. The runner beat the throw to home plate, but over the crowd's boisterous objections, the umpire called him out. The batter had failed to touch first base.

"Do you know for sure? Are you certain that you stepped on first base?" Clebe pleaded.

92 posted on 11/18/2002 1:25:58 PM PST by Dubya
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To: 68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub; bentfeather; Mo1; MeeknMing; leadpenny; HiJinx; mhking; southerngrit; ...

021110-N-4374S-058 Central Command Area of Responsibility (Nov. 10, 2002) -- A CH-46 "Sea Knight" helicopter hovers over the flight deck of the amphibious assault ship USS Nassau (LHA 4), preparing to land after transporting U.S. Marines from the 24th Marine Expeditionary Unit (MEU) Special Operations Capable (SOC). Nassau's Amphibious Ready Group (ARG) and embarked 24th MEU are conducting missions in support of Operation Enduring Freedom. U.S. Navy photo by Photographer’s Mate 2nd Class Michael Sandberg. (RELEASED)

93 posted on 11/18/2002 1:27:56 PM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: freedumb2003; Kathy in Alaska; bentfeather
Hi, you two, welcome aboard! Tonk is probably at work now...I 'spect Kathy and bentfeather are 'moderating' the Canteen this time of day. All that really means is that they're the hostesses for visitors right now. If I don't hurry, they're going to have your question answered before I do!

We have a new thread daily; some are dedicated like the "Pray for President Bush" thread each Sunday and others are just going to open with whatever Tonkin feels like putting up. You'll notice today has military humor as a general theme.

Each day we take some time to pass on a message of support to our veterans, active duty personnel, and their families. Some of us spend hours on end in the Canteen, and others just post once. Whichever you do doesn't matter, it's getting the message out to those we support that matters!

Have fun, and we look forward to seeing more of you!


94 posted on 11/18/2002 1:28:37 PM PST by HiJinx
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To: 68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub; bentfeather; Mo1; MeeknMing; leadpenny; HiJinx; mhking; southerngrit; ...

021110-N-4374S-035 Central Command Area of Responsibility (Nov. 10, 2002) -- U.S. Marines assigned to the 24th Marine Expeditionary Unit (MEU) Special Operations Capable (SOC) disembark from a Landing Craft Utility (LCU) 1662 assigned to Assault Craft Unit Two (ACU-2). Marines from the 24th MEU are conducting exercises in the United States Central Command Area of Responsibility (AOR) while on a regularly scheduled deployment in support of Operation Enduring Freedom. U.S. Navy photo by Photographer’s Mate 2nd Class Michael Sandberg. (RELEASED)

95 posted on 11/18/2002 1:29:55 PM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: Kathy in Alaska; All
Nonie and her daughter,
Nonie 2 have been asking about you Kathy.

96 posted on 11/18/2002 1:30:52 PM PST by Soaring Feather
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To: Dubya; All
CLEBE McCLARY, USMC (Ret.), holds up his Bible with the Marine Corps "Semper Fi" insignia on the cover while addressing last month's Ocean City Prayer Dinner.

Beautiful, Dubya, thank you!

97 posted on 11/18/2002 1:34:02 PM PST by Soaring Feather
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To: HiJinx; All
Hello sir, how are you today?

Good to see you!!
98 posted on 11/18/2002 1:35:20 PM PST by Soaring Feather
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To: aomagrat
Oh my gosh, aomagrat. LOL! Good Marine jokes. I imagine more than a few of our troops will enjoy them, both Marines and Navy.
99 posted on 11/18/2002 1:37:27 PM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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To: MeeknMing
ROTFLMAO!! Terrific link Meekie.
100 posted on 11/18/2002 1:39:17 PM PST by Kathy in Alaska
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