CHIRAC POSES NAKED FOR COVER OF ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY!

The Borowitz Report ^ | April 27, 2003 | Andy Borowitz

[proud American in Canada]

CHIRAC POSES NAKED FOR COVER OF ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY

‘Desperate’ Attempt to Win Back American Fans, Critics Say

French President Jacques Chirac startled diplomatic circles today with his decision to pose nude for the cover of Entertainment Weekly magazine.

Mr. Chirac, his hands strategically covering key parts of his anatomy, appears buck naked on the magazine cover with controversial phrases and epithets such as “cheese-eating surrender monkey” written on his body in what appears to be a magic marker.

Reached at his home in Paris, Mr. Chirac said he took the unusual step of doffing his duds for Entertainment Weekly after losing a coin toss to French Foreign Minister Dominique de Villepin.

While some in the State Department called Mr. Chirac’s bid to win back American fans “desperate,” the French President defended his decision: “It’s not about the nakedness. It’s about clothes getting in the way of labels.”

A spokesman for the French President later acknowledged that Mr. Chirac had no idea what that statement meant.

Secretary of State Colin Powell, who just last week said that the French would be “punished” for opposing the U.S.-led mission in Iraq, said today he was not sure whether Mr. Chirac’s naked photo shoot fit the bill.

“After looking at Mr. Chirac naked, it’s hard for me to say who’s punishing whom,” Mr. Powell said.

[F.J. Mitchell]

You missed a funny one.

I often get those x's in a box instead of the picture too, I'm not computer literate enough to know why.

[ALS]

it's showing now isn't it?

red x's usually indicate either the pic url was incorrect, the pic server shut off access or the server is temporarily down.

[skr]

The very idea may produce nightmares!