Skip to comments.SubGenius UFO Cult Gathers In New York For Apocalypse [End of the World predicted for July 5th]
Posted on 05/22/2009 6:10:29 AM PDT by Alex Murphy
05.22.2009 FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Contact: The SubGenius Foundation, Inc. 1-216-320-9528 Fax: (216) 320-9528 email@example.com
CLEVELAND, Ohio, May 22, 2009: The Church of the SubGenius has announced that the end of the world will take place in just over one month, on Sunday, July 5, 2009. In preparation for the fulfillment of this doomsday prophecy, the Church has issued a call to all of its members, to participate in a festival with rock concerts and blasphemous rituals taking place in upstate New York, during the final weekend before the arrival of the apocalypse.
The Church of the SubGenius is a popular organization often seen as a "parody" of religious cults, including Scientology, the Raelians, the Unification Church, and racist hate groups such as Christian Identity. The organization is widely seen as a satire that mocks organized religion, or as the church describes itself, "a cynisacreligion."
Since its inception in 1953, Church founder J.R. "Bob" Dobbs has predicted that a fleet of flying saucers will arrive at the beginning of July to destroy the worldwide Conspiracy against the Church of the SubGenius, while all ordained SubGenius ministers will be rescued by escape vessels piloted by the Alien Sex Goddesses, also known as the Xists.
The Church is inviting all of its members worldwide to gather together for the final hours in Sherman, New York from Wednesday, July 1, 2009 to Sunday, July 5, at a clothing-optional outdoor campground called Brushwood Folklore Center. The first gathering at this compound took place in 1996, and the event has increased in size and participants each following year. 1998 was designated the first true "X-Day," and each successive year has added one to the total. This year's celebration in 2009 is X-Day 12, or X-Day XII.
The Church has been engaged in a massive recruitment campaign to increase the numbers of its membership before the arrival of the Xists. According to Church records, the organization currently has approximately 100,000 members worldwide. SubGenius recruitment has been especially dedicated among the ranks of people who refuse to conform to the norms of society, including disbelievers, blasphemers, pranksters, rebels, hackers, pornographers, geeks, and outcasts.
The Church is seeking underground bands, indie rockers, performance artists, and performers and producers from the adult entertainment industry, because sexual freedom has been an important part of Church doctrine from the start. X-Day will be a celebration of free expression, performance art, rock and roll, pornography, and adult entertainment; and certain parts of the event will be restricted to adults only. Only ordained ministers of the Church of the SubGenius are allowed at the event, but the Church is accepting memberships at its standard rate of $30 up until the final hours of July 4.
The Church of the SubGenius has been no stranger to controversy since its foundation, and the upcoming X-Day celebration promises to be no different. In the late 1980s, members of the Church were accused of spreading a virus in Macintosh computers known as the "Peace Virus." Numerous articles have been written on the Church in such noteworthy publications as the New York Times, Washington Post, Wired Online, Boston Globe, U.S. News and World Report; and broadcast reports have been produced by CNN and NPR. In April 1999, officials of the city of Cambridge, Massachusetts shut down an official SubGenius Devival gathering in the belief that the Church was affiliated with the Trenchcoat Mafia (the organization blamed for the Columbine high school shootings), though authorities later realized the association was mistaken. In its January 1, 2000 issue, a Time magazine poll declared J.R. "Bob" Dobbs the biggest fraud of the 20th century.
The Church received additional media attention in 2006 when one of its high-ranking members, known in SubGenius circles as Reverend Mary Magdalen, became involved in a legal battle for custody of her son due to her membership in the Church. This case has been covered in such popular online sites as Boing Boing, Fark, and Wikinews (Wikipedia's news reporting service).
When the mysterious group '"Anonymous"' delcared war against the Church of Scientology in 2008, the Church of the SubGenius responded with a declaration of solidarity with the hackers on steroids -- and an invitation to the legions of Anonymous to join the Church in New York to prepare for X-Day.
....The Church is seeking underground bands, indie rockers, performance artists, and performers and producers from the adult entertainment industry, because sexual freedom has been an important part of Church doctrine from the start. X-Day will be a celebration of free expression, performance art, rock and roll, pornography, and adult entertainment; and certain parts of the event will be restricted to adults only. Only ordained ministers of the Church of the SubGenius are allowed at the event....
This is largely the reason the Church of the SubGenius was created in the first place - by declaring themselves "ordained ministers" and these activities as "religious observances", they gain tax exempt status for all manner of perversions.
UFO CULT GATHERS IN NEW YORK FOR APOCALYPSE 
Wrong. The Church of the Subgenius is an industrial church that has never asked for tax-exempt status. Stop spreading those Trevinist lies.
As a card-carrying reverend since 1979, I find it offensive that know-nothing ignoramuses such as yourself would dare to sully the great name of the Church and all that it stands for. From its original Dallas headquarters to its current undisclosed Ohio location, the Church has always stood against the One World Government and promised to be the one world religion. It may be a joke, but it’s a joke you can believe in.
Subgenious is so 1980s.
Somebody ping Quix.
Prophets for Profits!
Ten years behind you. 1989. Feels all soft and squishy knowing I’ve been pulling the wool over my own eyes for twenty years...
Sacrilege! Vile imitator!!!!
I’m not a Bob Dobbs follower, but I have been known to cherish and accumulate some slack.
Not enough slack?
And on my birthday no less! Woohoo! Going out with a bang baby!
Stop putting up empty posts.
Alien Sex Goddesses?
The BIG question we are all waiting on is : Will Orly Taitz put in an appearance....or will she be too involved in those Magna Carta Grand Juries to attend ???
The standard 8x8 pixel graphical character set for the ST (the main in-ROM "font" for GEM, and text-mode TOS operations in color modes) contains, following all the standard numbers, letters, symbols and accented characters, four unusual characters. These can be placed together in a square, forming a basic but recognisable facsimile of the face of J. R. "Bob" Dobbs, the supposed founder of the Church of the Subgenius.
A number of Linux Distro’s have included a “Bob” screensaver.
“clothing-optional outdoor campground called Brushwood” :}
Sometimes the jokes create themselves!
The World will end on July 5th. Damn! My Birthday is July 6th. No birthday presents this year I guess!