Posted on 07/09/2016 9:08:41 PM PDT by MFOSGO
My daughter was a thief. And what she stole was cold, hard cash.
It began with money from a parent’s wallet. Then, from another parent’s wallet. It moved on to a twenty from her big brother’s desk drawer. And then singles from the babysitter’s purse.
This happened a dozen times over. It was a pattern. It was serious, not incidental or of opportunity.
The piece de resistance was pinching thirty dollars from a school mate’s back pack – she got wind that the wad was in there for a donation.
Oh, and my daughter is seven.
I freaked out. Explained to her that if she kept up like this she would never be trusted by anyone and one day these actions might land her jail. I was cold, hard and blunt in the details.
But shockingly, she was not deterred. It happened again.
So, we took her to the police station.
We called our neighborhood precinct. Told them what had been happening and asked if we could bring her in for a talking to, as we were at a loss.
They said yes, sure.
My husband brought her in. She was hysterical. Hyperventilating, crying. She kept asking if she could say goodbye to assorted people and if she was going to die in jail.
It was heartbreaking. But the stealing had to stop.
He drove her there. And marched her inside the station as she mumbled, bracing herself, “I’m gonna be brave!”
The sergeant came over to wide-glassy-eyed-catatonic her. He gave her a pencil. And kindly and patiently explained the difference between giving and taking.
Then, as if I had paid him to be there, a half-drunk derelict in handcuffs reeled around the lobby squaring off at little her, “don’t ever go to jail! It sucks!
The sergeant took her back to the holding cell and showed her the ominous, metal bars and lock up.
Quietly and intensely he told my daughter that he knew she was a good girl and that she didn’t want to end up in there. He was sure she was never going to steal again!
She gave him a cracked half-smile. Tears spilled down her cheeks. He patted her on the head.
She came home and passed out.
That cop, with his busy station and important real-life business, took the time to help us solve a big problem. He was kind and generous. He could have easily told us to deal with it ourselves and not waste his time.
I think of this today as officers around this country are getting a completely false and bad wrap.
The real statistics:
Of the 990 arrest-related deaths in 2015, 38 were black and unarmed.
Thus far in 2016 of the 505 shot dead during arrests, 37 people were unarmed. 13 of them were black.
We sent 6 pizzas to that police station yesterday. And called them to voice our support. They were overtly grateful.
At a recent neighborhood festival, my daughter recognized one of the officers from the station. “That policeman was there when I was arrested” she said.
Good thing she got off that time. Because she never stole again.
Oh, we will spam the whole internet now with “MFOSGO’S DAUGHTER WAS A THIEF!”
Let me google MFOSGO...
well, Google follows FR, so it’s up there, but nothing on Freep page.
Hint to MFOSGO: don’t divulge your true identity here, however. I have done so indirectly. A link to Facebook could forever show WHOSE DAUGHTER WAS A THIEF!
Whatever you choose...
You’re absolutely right. It’s much better to leave the police visits until she’s 17. That way, the girl can actually spend some time in a cell.
Fine for your opinion. Mine is one that says it isn’t. She’s 7. Maybe the problem is with the parents? Just a thought.
Mine when 4 yrs old or so grabbed something at the checkout counter when with the Mrs.
The wife didn’t see it until they got home. She ended up taking the little one back to the store and making the little one tell the manager what she had done and returned the trinket.
Never had a problem with her ever taking something that wasn’t hers. She now has two Masters and teaches both high School and College.
Wow, lmao, you sure like to create scenarios in your head. Yay for you.
On a family trip to the Thousand Islands and Canada where we crammed into the family station wagon, and into various motels on route, shortly after return home, my mother noticed a different pillow on my brother's bed. When asked about it, he nonchalantly mentioned that he thought this this particular motel pillow was more comfortable than his at home, so he took it.
Our mother made him contact the motel, get the manager's/owner's name, and send it back, with an apology letter.
One of my four did also. Took her right back to the store and made her pay for it. My Mom did the same for me when I was little.
The last thing I’d do is drag my 7 or 17 year old down to the police station to teach her a lesson.
In this case, the parents knew that the daughter was only going to get a discussion from the desk cop, and may have even told the daughter the same... but her conscience was beginning to tell on her.
There’s a balance here. She didn’t get anything worse than a guilt trip of an afternoon. Nobody was even spanked. And again, for a HABIT that actually snared significant funds before it ended.
I would have no problem taking a youngster to our police station. Small town, the cops are tough but in situations like this, they would be gentle but direct. I think it was a great life lesson. Far better than her meeting the cops at 17 and looking at serving some time.
jmho
There’s always a balance for guiding each child, and it can differ even among siblings. Not too harsh, but firm enough.
I know what real guilt tripping is like, out of utter parental selfishness, and oh my, I wish something like what was described here was all I had ever been made to see. I grew up addicted to the guilt trip and had to learn, over decades, to be easier on myself. I don’t know all, but this looks a lot like a wise balance.
Cool story bro.
From my experience (having successfully raised 3 into adulthood), each child is very different, so what could be vastly inappropriate for one 7-year old might not be for another.
It seems to me that the parents had tried several times to stop the behavior, and used the “Scared Straight” “Tough Love” template to discourage this behavior/shake some sense into her.
As a young child—probably 7 or 8, my friend and I got the idea that on way home from school, it would be fun to take people’s mail...switch it, ditch it, etc with no regard to the havoc we might be causing...Eh a variation of sorts of ding-dong ditch.
Woah, when my mom got wind of it, I had to go around to every neighbor on my block and confess my crime and apologize—and to the postman too...it worked! Never did that again...Still remember the apology tour very clearly though ;)
Again, each child and family situation is different, but if loving parents who know their child can nip a theft problem in the bud, I applaud their efforts.
Glad your “tough love” worked, with the policeman’s help.
Btw, what was a seven-year-old doing with the stolen $10, $20 or $30? That’s a lot of bubble gum.
there is some good news...
...her demonstrated aptitude at liberation of monetary assets from the possession of others bodes well for her if she chooses a career with the IRS.
;)
My brother never did it again. He retired early from the USAF as a Major. He retired again as a Principal from a major consolidated Texas city school system. He has a Baptist Preacher Son and Son-in-law with a huge passel of grandkids. A blessed life now.
It seems blacks are getting off easier than other racial groups in terms of officer related shootings. The Marxists however, are taking advantage of old attitudes that blacks are unwilling to give up.
quite the quick study, no ?
The bigger picture here is that the police took time out to help a parent send a stern but positive message to a kid really going down the wrong track fast. The kid knows the police are there to help and prevent crime, not to hurt. This type of inoculation against the virus of the Left is vital for a law and order society where kids 7-17 can push back when their President and attorney General have blood on their hands for spewing evil and incendiary lies about American cops to foment unrest.
Glad the police put the fear of God in her.
Wow. You sure are opinionated on this. It seems to me, you’ve missed the entire point of this post. Why don’t you take a hike and take your trolling elsewhere.
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