Restroom Signs (18 and over language)

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[pocat]

Just recieved this in an email from a friend. I'm not sure if these signs are actually in the locations stated, but it would be appropriate. Enjoy.

Friends don't let friends take home ugly men ---Women's restroom, Starboard, Dewey Beach, DE

Remember, it's not, "How high are you?" It's "Hi, how are you?" ---Rest stop off Route 81, West Virginia

No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her shit. ---Men's Room, Linda's Bar and Grill, Chapel Hill, North Carolina

To do is to be - Descartes To be is to do - Voltaire Do be do be do - Frank Sinatra ---Men's restroom, Greasewood Flats, Scottsdale, Arizona

Make love, not war.-Hell, do both, get married! ---Women's restroom, The Filling Station, Bozeman, Montana

A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tires or testicles, you're going to have trouble with it. ---Women's restroom, Dick's Last Resort, Dallas, Texas

Watch out for Gay Limbo Dancers ---Inside toilet stall door, Men's restroom

Express Lane: Five beers or less ---Sign over one of the urinals, Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hills, CA

You're too good for him. ---Sign over mirror in Women's restroom, Ed Debevics, Beverly Hill, CA

No wonder you always go home alone. ---Sign over mirror in Men's restroom, Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hills, CA

The best way to a man's heart is to saw his breast plate open. ---Women's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL

If you voted for Clinton in the last election, you can't take a dump here. Your asshole is in Washington. ---Men's room Outback Steakhouse, Tacoma, Washington

Beauty is only a light switch away. ---Perkins Library, Duke University, Durham, North Carolina.

I've decided that to raise my grades I must lower my standards. ---Houghton Library, Harvard University, Cambridge, Massachusetts.

If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, then let's get wasted together and have the time of our lives. ---Armand's Pizza, Washington, D.C.

God made pot. Man made beer. Who do you trust? ---The Irish Times, Washington, D.C.

At the feast of ego, everyone leaves hungry. ---Bentley's House of Coffee and Tea, Tucson, Arizona

It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere. ---Written in the dust on the back of a bus, Wickenburg, Arizona.

If voting could really change things, it would be illegal. ---Revolution Books, New York, New York

Don't trust anything that bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die. ---Men's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL

What are you looking up on the wall for? The joke is in your hands. ---Men's restroom, Lynagh's, Lexington, KY

[monkeyshine]

I did that at a Beverly Hills department store once. Heck, it was Beverly Hills, I figured all the bathrooms had nice stalls!

On my way out of the stall I caught the eyes of a woman through the mirrow. I must have gotten an extremely embarassed look on my face, because she just got a sort of stared at me with this satisfied smirk on her face... and without word I just slipped out the door. (I finally did find the men's room. To wash my hands, of course).

[d4now]

Huge smile here. Thanks.

[Non-Sequitur]

And for those who find this whole bathroom thing unchallenging then try 'doing it' in Japan.

From www.engrish.com .

[jimtorr]

When I was in the USAF, stationed in Japan (way back in 1985) I once took a woman-friend out to Yokuska to go shopping at the Exchange electronics store (the best one on the main island).

Before we got there, she had to go weewee really bad. The only toilet (toto, if you need to ask for the location of one) we could find was an old Japanese style. That is, it was unisex, with urinals and a porcelin trench for the toilet.

The door was jammed open, so she made me stand guard outside while she took care of business. We weren't that kind of friends, either, but she was desperate.

[DainBramage]

[fnord]

(in a large nasty scrawl)
"I f$@ked your mother!"
(below it in smaller more precise script)
"Go home Dad, you're drunk!"

Seen written on a stall in a men's bathroom:
"My wife follows me everywhere."
Written just below it:
"I do not."

[strela]

Sighted in a pub in London:

Do not throw toothpicks in the bog. The crabs here can pole-vault.

[LTCJ]

The only toilet (toto, if you need to ask for the location of one) we could find

Imagine the distress of Dorothy's dog at seeing Japanese tourists arrive in Kansas. Yipe, yipe, yipe!

[metesky]

PotraPotty in Maine:

Here I sit on the pooper.
Giving birth to a Maine State Trooper.

[ItsOurTimeNow]

"If only my wife were this dirty."

Once saw that written in the grime on a bathroom mirror.

[Chad Bagwell]

They're in ALL Waffle Houses

[Chad Bagwell]

That was in the midd school bathroom.

[Chad Bagwell]

bano= shower

cuarto de bano= bathroom

hombre= man(?)

Yo soy comiendo tu perro= I am eating your dog.

[Jhoffa_]

Yo soy comiendo tu perro= I am eating your dog.

This just came up in conversation I suppose?

(Oh, hey bob.. by the way..)

[Taxman]

Sign over the urinal at the Wickenburg, AZ municipal airport restaurant:

"Pilots with short stacks and low manifold pressure are requested to stand close to the urinal."

[LibKill]

Seen in a bar in California, a state-mandated sign.

WASH YOUR HANDS.

LAVE SUS MANOS.

It had been altered by someone with a permanent marker to read:

WASH YOUR HANDS. with

LAVE SUS MANOS. and his orchestra.

[Chad Bagwell]

Nope, I just tell people that to see their responce. Pero no comprenden; no tienen clases de espanol.

[Jhoffa_]

Pero no comprenden; no tienen clases de espanol.

Taco Supremo.. With Sour-creem-O.. Yesterday-O cause I'm running $&@*(!% Late-O..

(I learn fast, eh?)

:)

[tictoc]

"God is dead." --Nietzsche

"Nietzsche is dead." --God

[wordsofearnest]

In the School of Business bathroom at Indiana State University. "Jesus Saves" "Moses Invests"