Posted on 12/16/2022 2:51:34 PM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
BEIJING — China's President Xi issued a stern warning to American politicians this week, vowing that any members of Congress who dare to vote for a ban on TikTok will be fired from their jobs.
"We hired all you American legislators to do one job: weaken and destroy America from within," said Xi gravely. "If you can't prove your fealty to the glorious CCP who graciously put you in your position, it will go on your performance review, and trust me — you don't want that to happen."
Already, lawmakers in Washington are backing away from supporting legislation that would ban the use of TikTok on government devices, although they insist it has nothing to do with the Chinese threat. "I just really like TikTok!" said Representative Eric Swalwell. "Fang Fang is on there! Um, I mean, it's so fun and creative!"
"I believe we need to think twice about banning this wonderful app," said Senator Mitch McConnell. "Have you seen the dancing girls on there? Such talent!"
President Xi has warned any lawmakers running for reelection that he won't secretly support their campaigns unless they comply. At publishing time, Army Chief of Staff General Milley had instructed his entire chain of command to download the app.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
Dang! The Bee got my for a few lines!!
Enjoy their stuff.
As usual the Bee is probably closer to the truth than anything the MSM is reporting.
“China Threatens To Fire Senators Who Voted For TikTok Ban”
Considering the influence China has in the US, I don’t think this is satire.
We have the best Congress money can buy.
Got me. Ouch. 😉
I always do.
👍👍👍
Since when did the BB become an actual news source?
; )
Funny now, reality in 10 years.
Me too. What made anyone think it might be satire?
Looks way too serious to me. ;-(
That statement only proves to me that we have many Communists in Congress.
It may be from The Babylon Bee but it’s closer to the truth than not.
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