Skip to comments.Need a smile?
Posted on 10/06/2018 10:49:20 AM PDT by sodpoodle
A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching his wife, who was looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off, he asked what she'd like to have for her birthday.
'I'd like to be eight again', she replied, still looking in the mirror.
On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of Coco Pops, and then took her to Adventure World theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Roller Coaster, everything there was.
Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down. He then took her to a McDonald's where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake.
Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop, and her favorite candy, M&M's. What a fabulous adventure!
Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed exhausted.
He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, 'Well Dear, what was it like being eight again'?
Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed.
'I meant my dress size, you f#**%g! retard!!!!'
The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he is gonna get it wrong.
Sorry, but I reacted to that one as a “groaner”.
Yes, any woman that talks to her husband that way is not funny but disgusting!
A lady comes home from her doctor’s appointment grinning from ear to ear. Her husband asks, “Why are you so happy?” The wife says, “The doctor told me that for a forty-five year old woman, I have the breasts of a eighteen year old.” “Oh yeah?” quipped her husband, “What did he say about your forty-five year old ass?” She said, “Your name never came up in the conversation.”
My son is autistic.
A wife asked her husband, “What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?” He looked at her from head to toe and replied, “I like your sense of humor!”
Decent joke until ruined by the wife’s vulgar “effing retard” crack.
Thx for your smile:)
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asks a young engineer fresh out of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, “And what starting salary are you looking for?” The engineer replies, “In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package.” The interviewer inquires, “Well, what would you say to a package of five weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every two years, say, a red Corvette?” The engineer sits up straight and says, “Wow! Are you kidding?” The interviewer replies, “Yeah, but you started it.”
Relevance to this thread?
Reading comprehension much?
i don’t get the reference either. what does his son have to do with the joke???
And now an insult? I simply didn’t read anything suggesting anything about autism. Sure you have the right thread?
That one’s funny.
the remark about fn’ing retards.
Liberal going wacko:
YOU will never sit on the Supreme Court!
I guess I’ve been around sailors and other rough men in various lines of work too long. I don’t even notice the swearing some here do.
Your son is not retarded. He's autistic. There's a huge difference, and, with respect, you do your son disservice by conflating the two.
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