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Flintstones Vitamins Now Available With Puberty Blockers
The Babylon Bee ^ | April 30, 2021 | The Babylon Bee

Posted on 05/03/2021 7:04:40 PM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks

WHIPPANY, NJ—Bayer AG, the multinational pharmaceutical corporation, has announced a brand new line of trans-friendly Flintstones vitamins laced with puberty-blocking hormones. To help normalize early childhood transition, the vitamins will be on sale over the counter without restriction.

"Yes, zis seems all very ethical," said Bayer CEO Hans Von Himmler while stroking his pet cat-pig hybrid. "Ve simply give ze little girl-child ze hormones, and then ze beard grows. Ve always on ze right side of history."

Flintstones vitamins' new girl-to-boy chewables will be made of anabolic steroids with vitamins and delicious fruit flavors added in. The vitamins will be completely organic and hormone-free-- except, of course, for the synthetic hormones which are the active ingredient.

Some politicians expressed alarm at the thought of giving synthetic hormones to young children, but they quickly fell silent after Bayer threatened to pull campaign donations and business from their states.

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Chit/Chat; Food; Health/Medicine; Humor; Miscellaneous; Science; Society
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; bayer; children; flintstones; lgbt; pubertyblockers; satire; transgender; vitamins
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1 posted on 05/03/2021 7:04:40 PM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
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To: 100American; al baby; Allegra; BufordP; dp0622; EveningStar; Gefn; GunsareOK; JRios1968; ...

Better living through chemistry.

DANG!


2 posted on 05/03/2021 7:05:31 PM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks (GOP-free since 10/9/20)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

By the way, there is a “woke” version of the Flintstones coming to a theater near you.


3 posted on 05/03/2021 7:05:53 PM PDT by dynachrome ("I will not be reconstructed, and I do not give a damn.")
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

That…may be unwise satire.


4 posted on 05/03/2021 7:08:58 PM PDT by ctdonath2 (The claim of consensus is the first refuge of scoundrels.)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

I have words about this, but I cannot put them on this family friendly forum.


5 posted on 05/03/2021 7:09:13 PM PDT by Jonty30 (Just because I coughed on you does not mean that I have covid. It means that we have covid. )
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

“Oooh, these kids play around early - now they have birth control pills shaped like Fred Flintstone”
- Rodney Dangerfield


6 posted on 05/03/2021 7:09:21 PM PDT by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

The Bee got me!


7 posted on 05/03/2021 7:09:38 PM PDT by a fool in paradise (Lean on Joe Biden to follow Donald Trump's example and donate his annual salary to charity. )
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

I’m glad it’s the Babylon Bee, because it isn’t beyond the pale of liberalism to do this.


8 posted on 05/03/2021 7:09:46 PM PDT by Jonty30 (Just because I coughed on you does not mean that I have covid. It means that we have covid. )
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Babylon Bee

One day it may not be fictitious


9 posted on 05/03/2021 7:09:48 PM PDT by Secret Agent Man (Gone Galt; Not Averse to Going Bronson.)
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To: ctdonath2

To a liberal, he would take it as a suggestion.


10 posted on 05/03/2021 7:10:10 PM PDT by Jonty30 (Just because I coughed on you does not mean that I have covid. It means that we have covid. )
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To: dynachrome
I wonder if it will be worse then that one with Rosie O'Donnell.

It would have to dig pretty deep to do that.

11 posted on 05/03/2021 7:12:55 PM PDT by Harmless Teddy Bear (May their path be strewn with Legos, may they step on them with bare feet until they repent. )
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To: Jonty30

It gets more difficult with each week, doesn’t it?

Today’s satire is tomorrow’s lunacy.


12 posted on 05/03/2021 7:13:12 PM PDT by BradyLS (DO NOT FEED THE BEARS!)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

This is a great satire by the Bee, I love the german accent of the CEO, nice touch


13 posted on 05/03/2021 7:14:10 PM PDT by Trump.Deplorable
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Has Politifact checked this yet?


14 posted on 05/03/2021 7:17:27 PM PDT by Lurkina.n.Learnin (The veil of civilization is only 9 meals thick. )
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To: Harmless Teddy Bear

It probably is.


15 posted on 05/03/2021 7:17:56 PM PDT by dynachrome ("I will not be reconstructed, and I do not give a damn.")
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To: dynachrome

I think it’s a TV series. And they are making it “adult”, not just “woke”, because nothing can be good, clean fun for the whole family anymore. Gotta make it a bit offensive. Ugh.


16 posted on 05/03/2021 7:21:17 PM PDT by Stravinsky
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Das cray see.


17 posted on 05/03/2021 7:22:06 PM PDT by ifinnegan ( Democrats kill babies and harvest their organs to sell)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

The Bee REALLY needs to stop giving Socialist Democrats new ideas!


18 posted on 05/03/2021 7:23:02 PM PDT by Diana in Wisconsin (I don't have 'Hobbies.' I'm developing a robust post-Apocalyptic skill set. )
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To: Jonty30

And many conservatives would boycott the product on that headline alone.


19 posted on 05/03/2021 7:24:25 PM PDT by ctdonath2 (The claim of consensus is the first refuge of scoundrels.)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Today the Bee, tomorrow the New York Times..

I was musing re Jenner coming out against biological
males competing against females in sports.

The argument was framed correctly as a fairness issue.

Of course the wokeverse roasted Jenner for this heresy.

I’m coming to the conclusion that what is planned is to
crowd girls out of sports since they lack exposure to
testosterone and thus are out-classed.

Medicating with testosterone will be their only recourse to compete in sports.

A few years back an insane plan was hatched to make
testosterone patches available to women to boost libido
as well as other effects.

I lobbied heavily against this nonsense... it is
inconceivable that such stupidity was entertained as
a good idea :-/

In the Bush years they made testosterone a controlled substance.
The idea was to protect youth from feeling pressure to use
T to improve sports stamina...

The notion of biological males competing in girls sports
is so obviously unfair that it is conceivable, given our mad
woke culture that they are attempting to make it acceptable
for girls to take T so they can compete against trans-girls.

Booo-Hisss

Beam me up!


20 posted on 05/03/2021 7:25:54 PM PDT by Bobalu (When I die I want to be buried in Chicago so I can stay active in politics)
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