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Rittenhouse, Sandmann Agree To Share Joint Custody Of CNN
Babylon Bee ^ | 11/19/21

Posted on 11/19/2021 1:25:39 PM PST by Pollard

ATLANTA, GA—With Rittenhouse found "not guilty", media outlets across the country are preparing for costly defamation lawsuits after a year of calling him a white supremacist.

With CNN already half-owned by Nick Sandmann, the famous fake news organization will soon be giving the other half of its ownership over to Kyle Rittenhouse. The two have agreed to share joint custody.

"We would like to announce that our clients have come to an agreement to share custody of CNN," said Sandman and Rittenhouse's legal teams. "Sandmann will have custody on weekdays, with custody transferring over to Rittenhouse on holidays and weekends."

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; illinois; kenosha; kylerittenhouse; wisconsin
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1 posted on 11/19/2021 1:25:39 PM PST by Pollard
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To: Army Air Corps; CondoleezzaProtege; Yaelle

Ping!


2 posted on 11/19/2021 1:26:15 PM PST by KC_Lion
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To: Pollard

Hysterical!


3 posted on 11/19/2021 1:26:31 PM PST by WashingtonSource
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To: Pollard

I was disappointed when Sandmann wasn’t granted controlling ownership of CNN and Washington Post. His settlement fell short.


4 posted on 11/19/2021 1:27:09 PM PST by rightwingcrazy (;-,)
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To: Pollard

ROFL!


5 posted on 11/19/2021 1:27:34 PM PST by BipolarBob (I thought growing old would take longer.)
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To: Pollard

I ❤ The Bee!


6 posted on 11/19/2021 1:27:38 PM PST by mewzilla (Those aren't masks. They're muzzles. )
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To: Pollard

LOL!


7 posted on 11/19/2021 1:27:44 PM PST by Jamestown1630 ("A Republic, if you can keep it.")
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To: Pollard

lol


8 posted on 11/19/2021 1:27:50 PM PST by Conserv ( )
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To: mewzilla
Hold my beer
9 posted on 11/19/2021 1:28:09 PM PST by mewzilla (Those aren't masks. They're muzzles. )
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To: Republicanprofessor

Pingy


10 posted on 11/19/2021 1:28:56 PM PST by billorites (freepo ergo sum)
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To: Pollard

I would love to share a few bottles of wine with the folks from the Bee. We share the same sense of humor


11 posted on 11/19/2021 1:31:33 PM PST by FatherofFive (We support Trump. Not the GOP)
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To: Pollard

LOL!!!!!


12 posted on 11/19/2021 1:32:33 PM PST by MNJohnnie (They would have abandon leftism to achieve sanity. Freeper Olog-hai)
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To: Pollard

What’s the net worth of a turd. Thanks Bee!


13 posted on 11/19/2021 1:33:07 PM PST by Huskrrrr (Alinsky, you magnificent Bastard, I read your book!)
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To: Pollard

BB - you owe me a new keyboard. Coffee all over the place.


14 posted on 11/19/2021 1:33:28 PM PST by Apparatchik (If you find yourself in a confusing situation, simply laugh knowingly and walk away - Jim Ignatowski)
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To: Pollard

BB - you owe me a new keyboard. Coffee all over the place.


15 posted on 11/19/2021 1:34:17 PM PST by Apparatchik (If you find yourself in a confusing situation, simply laugh knowingly and walk away - Jim Ignatowski)
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To: Pollard

MSNBC should pay support, alimony and forfeit half their stuff (at least)!


16 posted on 11/19/2021 1:35:07 PM PST by outofsalt (If history teaches us anything, it's that history rarely teaches anything.)
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I thought the bee was supposed to be satire.


17 posted on 11/19/2021 1:37:47 PM PST by dsrtsage ( Complexity is just simple lacking imaginationd)
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To: outofsalt

The Judge in the trial agreed and banned MSNBC from the remainder of the trial.


18 posted on 11/19/2021 1:38:19 PM PST by Texas Fossil ((Texas is not where you were born, but a Free State of Heart, Mind & Attitude!))
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To: Pollard

satire today.

fact tomorrow.


19 posted on 11/19/2021 1:39:48 PM PST by cableguymn (We need a redneck in the white house.... But the fact checkers said theintjey did story was false!)
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To: Pollard

LOL. CNN is not the only Network that will be sued. Bleed em dry Kyle.


20 posted on 11/19/2021 1:40:18 PM PST by tennmountainman ( Less Lindell CONS, More AZ Style Audits)
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