Posted on 03/26/2024 8:31:20 AM PDT by dayglored
NEW YORK, NY — After news broke that the bond amount in his fraud case had been lowered from $454 million to $175 million, former President Donald Trump announced he would pay the bond in its entirety with bags of nickels.
Trump notified the court that preparations had already been made for a fleet of armored trucks to arrive at the courthouse and begin unloading cases and cases of freshly minted and rolled nickels totaling $175 million.
"Beautiful, shiny nickels. So many nickels," Trump said in his announcement. "It's a total sham that I have to pay anything, but now that the bond amount has been significantly reduced, I will now pay it in full with five-cent pieces. Our wonderful U.S. nickel. Thomas Jefferson on one side. We love Thomas Jefferson, don't we, folks? I hope Letitia James loves him too, because she's going to be seeing $175 million worth of him. I win once again, just like I will in November, believe me. Bigly!"
New York Attorney General Letitia James had her staff searching through state laws in an effort to find a way to prevent Trump from paying his bond in change to no avail. "He won't get away with this," James was overheard saying. "He thinks he can dump $175 million in nickels in my office? Time to cook up another baseless lawsuit."
At publishing time, Trump was reportedly facing new indictment charges for failing to fall into financial ruin by the previous set of indictment charges.
I will now pay it in full with five-cent pieces. Our wonderful U.S. nickel. Thomas Jefferson on one side. We love Thomas Jefferson, don't we, folks? I hope Letitia James loves him too, because she's going to be seeing $175 million worth of him.I damn near peed my pants laughing at that one!
I know it’s the Bee, but it would be freaking epic!
Damn....I thought he read my post. Would love to see a truck back up the Judge Egor’s house...
I love this, he should do it :-D
Thats actually a damned good idea.
Whatever The Bee is paying their writers, it’s not enough. 😏
At first I thought it was real! I am such a schmuck.
That would require 3.5 billion nickles if I calculated correctly. But what a sight that would make.
One guy on Quora tried to figure out how many dump trucks would be needed to carry $1B in nickles.
“the number of dump trucks ... around 900,000. This is all assuming that the trucks can hold the weight of 21,000 nickels, which is 105,000kg (231,000lbs).”
If he were right it would require about 157,500 dump truck loads for $175M in nickles if I did that right. Nerd exercise for the day.
No offense to the BB, but pennies would be more fun though as it would take 17.5 trillion of them!
And it’s beautiful. Yuge. He’ll have a big beautiful railcar or three loaded with nickels. Yuge railcars. Beautiful nickels ... and they are beautiful ... nice and shiny.
I once paid My Water Bill ($600.00+) in Pennies.
Had a leaking toilet while I was in the Hospital from Emergency Surgery on a Ruptured Intestine and a repair on top of that a week later, put into an Induced Coma that kept Me from ripping out the second set of stitches. Then a month in a Nursing Rehabilitation Center learning how to walk again.
They wouldn’t even let Me pay over time of uthe Bill. So they got the pennies...
A million dollars in $100 bills would weigh approximately 22 pounds.
So if I figured it right, 175 million x 22 pounds would equal 3,850 pounds.
Even doing it that way would be hilarious!
And I didn’t read the “article” before posting that. Looks like I have about the same sense of “Trumpspeak” as The Bee.
That’s three and a half BILLION nickels, for the arithmetic impaired ...
Do that many nickels even exist?
Yeah I do wish Trump could do something interesting with this fine to make a spectacle out of it.
Never let an opportunity go to waste.
And of course he needs a receipt with an accurate count. Assuming 2 second per nickel, it would take over 200 years to generate an accurate count.😈
I would if it were me.
Legal coin of the realm.
They can count it themselves.
Imagine your office being buried in 3.5 billion nickels!
I realize this is satire, but Trump should pay this extortion in PESOs (since they reap the benefits of our corrupt government), Chinese Yuan (since they own the current resident and all those who prop up the feeble bastard), or some obscure banana repbulic (since that's what we have become with these inept communists running amok)!
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