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DUmmie FUnnies 10-03-05 ("Rather was prevented from going after smirk's N.G. paper's rigging")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | October 3, 2005 | DUmmies, Mary Mapes, and PJ-Comix

Posted on 10/03/2005 3:27:34 PM PDT by PJ-Comix

As many of you might remember, the DUmmie FUnnies blog began with coverage of the DUmmie reaction to the forged Texas Air National Guard Memos presented on a the CBS 60 Minutes II show hosted by Dan Rather. At the time of the exposure, Dan Rather insisted the memos were really authentic. Rather kept INSISTING on the authenticity of those obviously forged memos even when it was proven beyond a shadow of doubt that they were fake. After Dan Rather retired was fired from CBS News, he changed his tune a bit by saying that even though the memos might have been forgeries, the substance of the charge against Bush was still correct even though the only real documentary evidence were those fake memos. Now we have a new defense of Dan Rather in this DUmmie THREAD titled, "Rather was prevented from going after smirk's N.G. paper's rigging." According to this latest HILARIOUS conspiracy theory promoted by the DUmmies, our hero Dan Rather really wants to prove that Karl Rove and the EVIL Republicans were behind the forgery of the Texas Air National Guard Memos, in a complex scheme to discredit See-BS News. This bizarre theory was published over at the Leftwing ONLINE JOURNAL. As usual, the crazed DUmmie rantings entertaining us with bizarre theories are in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering if Dan Rather will trip over the killer of OJ's ex-wife out on the golf course while searching for who is behind the forgeries, is in the [brackets]:

Rather was prevented by CBS (subsidiary of Viacom) from going after the GOP operatives who doctored the documents

[Maybe Rather should put OJ on the case. While OJ is trying to find the killer of his ex-wife, he could also be keeping a lookout for the GOP operatives who doctored the TANG documents.]

Speaking at the National Press Club on September 26, Dan Rather responded to a question posed by moderator Marvin Kalb concerning the controversial TANG files of George W. Bush. Kalb asked Rather why he did not return to the story and investigate those who created the guard files, passed them off to a former TANG officer and hence to CBS's 60 Minutes, and tipped off right-wing bloggers before the airing of the pre-2004 election exposé by 60 Minutes. Rather responded, "You'll have to ask CBS that question."

[Yes, our intrepid reporter was hot on the trail of those NASTY Republican operatives who forged the TANG documents but CBS pulled him off the case. Somehow Dan Rather believes he has no free will. He somehow needs permission from CBS to do any investigations.]

Rather stated it was his desire to continue to delve into the story and the set-up. According to CBS insiders, the original TANG files were scanned by GOP dirty tricks operatives using a sophisticated text scanner that changed the original IBM typewriter Courier font to a Times Roman font, automatically created a "th" superscript for date numbers, and created margins and pagination. An independent panel commissioned by CBS and headed by former GOP Attorney General Richard Thornburgh never concluded the documents were bogus.

[What CBS insiders? Mary Mapes? Dan Rather? Tooth Fairy?]

In fact, the GOP operatives had to be very careful in their dirty tricks operation: forging or counterfeiting official government documents is a felony. However, scanning original documents technically does not fall under the category of counterfeiting. Nevertheless, the GOP quickly tipped off right-wing bloggers, including Free Republic.com, that the CBS documents were forgeries. In doing so, Karl Rove and his team successfully refocused attention away from Bush and his AWOL status in the Guard and on to Dan Rather and 60 Minutes. People like Karl Rove and, as reported by The New York Post, long time GOP dirty tricks operative Roger Stone, got away with the entire caper, thus eliminating Bush's phony military record as a campaign issue.

[Yes, the GOP used their secret decoder ring to send out a high priority message to Freeper Buckhead to make the forgery claim with a couple of hours after the broadcast. And don't forget that Friar Tuck was involved in this devious scheme as well.]

Rather reiterated his recent comments at Fordham University that a fear mentality has gripped news rooms across the nation. He partly blamed the government for instilling fear among America's journalists.

[It's such a shame. Journalists can no longer use forged documents in their news stories without FEAR of exposure. DAMN THOSE BLOGGERS!!!]

I think at this point the newsrooms are almost completely filled with Repubs, top to bottom. The purge of sensible journalists was begun 20 or so years ago, so that at this point nearly all reporters and editors are Bush/RW sympathizers, and the few who aren't fear for their jobs or worse on a daily basis - they know that one misstep will get them fired and blacklisted.

[Liberal Reporters were taken away in the middle of the night and replaced with Replicant Republicans. The Replicants look just like the original Liberal Reporters except they have a small green leafy growth on the backs of their necks.]

Y'know, I've gotten way past sick of hearing this How many newsrooms have YOU been in? I've worked in them for the better part of the last 20 years, and I can tell you that Republicans are definitely in the minority.

[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

So basically... either a major felony was committed or the documents were copies of originals. That calls for an investigation, definitely.

[Stand by for a new TV detective show: "Rather: PI"]

Last night at the News and Documentary Emmy awards, Dan Rather was given the Lifetime Acheivement Award and was warmly spoken of by all there, among them some of the biggest names in news. At least one person stated that they thought that the substance of what Rather had reported re * was true. I think they all know he was set up. But why nobody came to his defense and investigated the story seems to come down to being intimidated by the RW powers that be. Maybe now, as the Republican party crumbles and falls (and I am certain that it is) we will see the vindication of this fine journalist.

[So the forged papers that Rather claimed were authentic were forged but by the EVIL GOP? FUnnie but I remember the DUmmies vouching for their authenticity last year.]

There is NO evidence AT ALL the documents were forged--NONE.

[Make up your mind already! Let's see. According to DUmmie logic the documents were definitely NOT forged but if they were then it was all the fault of the EVIL GOP.]

Seems to me that if someone had access to an IBM selectric and access to a scanner with OCR software, they could at least demonstrate how it could be done.

[Calling Lucy Ramirez!!!]

What specifically is the fear? Job loss?

[No. Fear of a loss of invitations to the PC Georgetown cocktail parties.]

Dan Rather is not quitting. And he won't be forgetting Karl Rove anytime too soon.

[Payback is a bitch. WHAT'S THE FREQUENCY, KARL!!!]

Mapes was the senior producer for 60 Minutes assigned to this story. What she failed to do in this case was unbelievable: when wacky Lt.Col.Bill Burkett provided CBS with the name of the source for the Killian documents, Mapes didn't verify that information. If Mapes had simply taken the time to pick up the telephone and spoken to the person that Burkett had claimed was his source, CBS would have known right away that Burkett was not to be trusted. CBS didn't bother to call the alleged source until after they aired the story -- at which time, the source denied providing Burkett with his documents or knowing anything about them. A high school journalism student would know enough to check up on sources before going with a story.

[And this DUmmie wins a Kewpie Doll for having a brief moment of mental clarity!]

There were three other producers fired as well. Seems she wasn't the only one amateurish enough not to check on the source.

[WHEW! It's a relief to know that Mary Mapes wasn't the only biased incompetent at See-BS News. And now this excerpt from Mary Mapes new book, "Truth And Duty":]

It was another day of exhausted exultation. I got congratulatory e-mails, phone calls, and pats on the back. Other reporters called repeatedly as they worked to catch up to my story. I was thrilled.

All that changed about 11:00 a.m., when I first started hearing rumbles from some producers at CBS News that a handful of far right Web sites were saying that the documents had been forged.

I was incredulous. That couldn’t be possible. Even on the morning the story aired, when we showed the president’s people the memos, the White House hadn’t attempted to deny the truth of the documents. In fact, the president’s spokesman, Dan Bartlett, had claimed that the documents supported their version of events: that then-lieutenant Bush had asked for permission to leave the unit.

Within a few minutes, I was online visiting Web sites I had never heard of before: Free Republic, Little Green Footballs, Power Line. They were hard-core, politically angry, hyperconservative sites loaded with vitriol about Dan Rather and CBS. Our work was being compared to that of Jayson Blair, the discredited New York Times reporter who had fabricated and plagiarized stories.

All these Web sites had extensive write-ups on the documents: on typeface, font style, and peripheral spacing, material that seemed to spring up overnight. It was phenomenal. It had taken our analysts hours of careful work to make comparisons. It seemed that these analysts or commentators---or whatever they were---were coming up with long treatises in minutes. They were all linking to one another, creating an echo chamber of outraged agreement.

I was told that the first posting claiming the documents were fakes had gone up on Free Republic before our broadcast was even off the air! How had the Web site even gotten copies of the documents? We hadn’t put them online until later. That first entry, posted by a longtime Republican political activist lawyer who used the name “Buckhead,” set the tone for what was to come.

[Apparently the utter LACK of fact checking on the part of Mary Mapes extends even to her own book since Buckhead did not make his post on the Free Republic about the fake documents until a couple of hours AFTER the show aired. Thank you for your consistency, Miss Mapes. You are consistently WRONG due to your failure to fact check in all matters.]

Yikes..... I hope this isn't one of her main points....Because I thought it was established that Buckhead posted a couple of hours (still suspiscious as hell) after the EST showing and FR is based on PST.

[BINGO you LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

Why aren't any high level Democrats looking into this?

[Fear of humiliation?]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: 2004election; barkingmoonbats; brownshirtsforkerry; cbsnews; conspiracy; conspiracytheory; danrather; dummies; election2004; forgeddocuments; goebbelswouldbeproud; howtostealanelection; karlrove; leftwingfringe; marymapes; mediabias; rathergate; seebs; tang; tinfoil
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To: hattend
Mary, you ignorant slut.

I thought the quote started "Jane, you....".... oh, you're talking about Mary Mapes. Well, in that case, Never mind... < /emmilylatella>

41 posted on 10/03/2005 4:59:54 PM PDT by NoCmpromiz (What part of John 14:6 don't you understand?)
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To: PJ-Comix
"Within a few minutes, I was on-line visiting Web sites I had never heard of before: Free Republic, Little Green Footballs, Power Line".

HELLO DUmmies. This, right here could be PART of your problem. Don't you get it yet???? Have you not capacitor for a little freakin' abstract thinking?

It's the NEW world of information you ignorant twits. GO LOOK and stay informed. You people are just not in the GAME if you have NO CLUE that there is a whole world of information out there that DISPUTES your clueless leftism.

Ping me if the left EVER gets a clue that until the freakin'UN takes over the internet, they are toast when it comes to basic research. ANd oh yeah, if the UN takes over the internet, we will FIND ANOTHER WAY to irritate the living hell out of you.

Twits.
42 posted on 10/03/2005 5:03:54 PM PDT by alarm rider (Irritating leftists as often as is humanly possible....)
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To: PJ-Comix
I think at this point the newsrooms are almost completely filled with Repubs, top to bottom.

I think I want some of whatever it is this whackjob is smoking. :)

43 posted on 10/03/2005 5:09:04 PM PDT by KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle ("As a conservative site, Free Republic is pro-G-d, PRO-LIFE..." -- FR founder Jim Robinson)
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To: PJ-Comix
Top 50? (It's been a long day....)

Poor, poor DUmmies. They have a one-track mind (they share a common brain, you know...) with VERY little traffic....

44 posted on 10/03/2005 5:10:58 PM PDT by dirtbiker (I've tried to see the liberal point of view, but I couldn't get my head that far up my a$$....)
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To: PJ-Comix
DUmmies have so much hatred that they will believe anything if it is against a Republican

I'm sorry, I disliked Clinton's politics, was against about everything he did as President, but I just cannot hate like the rats do.

Top 100?

45 posted on 10/03/2005 5:11:52 PM PDT by Budge (<>< Sit Nomen Domini benedictum. <><)
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To: eddie willers

"Shifty Paradigm." Sounds like a good name to use for a Single Action Shooting Society monicker...


46 posted on 10/03/2005 5:12:38 PM PDT by 185JHP ( "The thing thou purposest shall come to pass: And over all thy ways the light shall shine.")
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To: weegee
Why would the Democrats want to shine line on their handiwork?

Well, they pretty much leave a slime trail everywhere else they go.....

47 posted on 10/03/2005 5:13:36 PM PDT by dirtbiker (I've tried to see the liberal point of view, but I couldn't get my head that far up my a$$....)
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To: PJ-Comix
Within a few minutes, I was online visiting Web sites I had never heard of before: Free Republic, Little Green Footballs, Power Line.

What a LIAR!

Yes, we're to believe that a longtime "producer" (i.e researcher) and hardcore political operative Mary Mapes has "never heard of" Free Republic, Little Green Footballs, or Powerline.

What a LIAR!!!
48 posted on 10/03/2005 5:16:20 PM PDT by motzman (Vote Quimby)
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To: PJ-Comix
All these Web sites had extensive write-ups on the documents: on typeface, font style, and peripheral spacing, material that seemed to spring up overnight. It was phenomenal. It had taken our analysts hours of careful work to make comparisons. It seemed that these analysts or commentators---or whatever they were---were coming up with long treatises in minutes

Guess our guys are just smarter than yours.

49 posted on 10/03/2005 5:23:24 PM PDT by carlr
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To: PJ-Comix

Top 50?


50 posted on 10/03/2005 5:29:55 PM PDT by Choose Ye This Day (I just stepped in a big pile of sassy.)
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To: PJ-Comix

First 50!


51 posted on 10/03/2005 5:32:30 PM PDT by Amityschild (I may be gullible BUT I'm not a DUmmie!)
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To: Amityschild

Sorry. I called it first.


52 posted on 10/03/2005 5:35:54 PM PDT by Choose Ye This Day (I just stepped in a big pile of sassy.)
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To: Charles Henrickson

Buckhead to Rather, Mapes & DU:

Bring it.


53 posted on 10/03/2005 5:37:02 PM PDT by Buckhead
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To: Buckhead
Yeah, you da man. And poor Dan Rather will never be the same.
54 posted on 10/03/2005 5:45:36 PM PDT by shezza (Blue Star Family)
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To: PJ-Comix

I worked for years in the library of an ivy league liberal arts college in the Hudson Valley, NY--you would not believe the goings on in that place. Almost every night we kicked students out for copulating (or attempting to) in the stacks. And in the morning, used condoms littered the floors. If Mommy and Daddy only knew....


55 posted on 10/03/2005 5:48:30 PM PDT by ariamne (Proud shieldmaiden of the infidel--never forget, never forgive 9/11)
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To: PJ-Comix

"I think at this point the newsrooms are almost completely filled with Repubs, top to bottom."

Ummmm...would these be the same newsrooms where, when surveyed, about 90% of the reporters say that they vote for DemocRATs?

I almost missed this DUFU because I was over on one of the Harriet Miers wrist-slashing threads.


56 posted on 10/03/2005 6:11:11 PM PDT by Purrcival (Let's give Miers a chance)
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To: Morgan's Raider

"Paging John Conyers...Here's something else for you to make an ass out of yourself over."

You, too, Cynthia McKinney! Get on it, right now! BWAH-HAHAHA!


57 posted on 10/03/2005 6:16:02 PM PDT by Purrcival (Let's give Miers a chance)
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To: PJ-Comix
ROTFLOL !!!!!
58 posted on 10/03/2005 6:22:39 PM PDT by Deetes (God Bless the Troops and their Families)
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To: Buckhead

From one Atlanta-area Freeper to another: GREAT JOB!

Thanks for visiting the DUFU thread...


59 posted on 10/03/2005 6:36:28 PM PDT by Purrcival (Let's give Miers a chance)
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To: PJ-Comix

Well, when I was here thisw morning, everyone was eating each other up over Miers. Is everyone full?:)


60 posted on 10/03/2005 6:47:12 PM PDT by WinOne4TheGipper (Please don't feed the tagline.)
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