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DUmmie FUnnies 12-29-05 ("The post impeachment administration: Powell-Gore?")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | December 29, 2005 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 12/29/2005 9:43:03 AM PST by PJ-Comix

The only thing more bizarre than the DUmmie THREAD featured in the DUmmie FUnnies this morning where the DUmmies fantasized about a reality-challenged scenario where Bush gets chimpeached is this DUmmie THREAD titled, "The post impeachment administration: Powell-Gore?" As you might have surmised from the title, the DUmmies are already assuming the fantasy of a chimpeachment and are now planning on the makeup of the post-chimpeachment administration. Colin Powell isn't even in government any more but that small fact doesn't seem to interfere with the DUmmie fantasy as you shall see. Even more bizarre is that Powell would somehow choose Al Gore to be his vice-president. But wait, DUmmies! Why stop there? I mean since we are in your Alternate Reality, wouldn't Powell say to himself that Gore was really elected in 2000 and then meekly step aside and let Gore take over the presidency? As usual, the DUmmie Fantasies being channeled from the Alternate Universe are in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, envisioning my own Alternate Reality of Petra Verkaik and Salma Hayek battling it out in a hotel room over who gets first dibs at my body, is in the [brackets]:

The post impeachment administration: Powell-Gore?

[Or Tooth Fairy-Kucinich?]

I believe that if the Democrats take the House after the mid term congressional elections, there will be an impeachment. Moreover, the Democratic majority will give cover to disgruntled Republicans to join the impeachment effort.

[How kind of you to give cover to the disgruntled Republicans of the Alternate Universe.]

However, we have to keep in mind that it is almost a certainty that impeachment will not change Republican party control of the executive branch. This is because the outgoing president will control the appointment of a vice president.

[Damn that Constitution!]

As during the Nixon administration, once Congress decides that impeachment is a real possibility, they will first have to force out a corrupt vice president -- then Agnew, today Cheney. It is inconceivable that Congress would impeach Bush, but allow the author and instigator of most of his crimes, Cheney, to assume the presidency.

[And don't forget Denny Hastert. We must get rid of him too! Plus everybody down to about the 145th level of succession.]

This raises an important question for Democrats: Who will be the post impeachment president and vice president?

[Why ask the Democrats? They have NO input as to the post chimpeachment president and vice president.]

Almost all the Republicans in the administration and the Senate are simply too tainted either by the crimes of the administration or corruption in Congress. Both parties' leaders will be trying to clean house, signal a move by the Republicans from the extreme fringe right policy positions and send a message to the international community that the US is ready to return to the "reality based" international community -- all in the same appointment.

[Your use of the term "reality based" already has me doubling up in laughter.]

Frankly, the only viable Republicans are John McCain and Colin Powell, and given the international crisis that Bush has created, Powell is the far more likely candidate.

[Thanx for just killing McCain's primary election chances in '08. Any "Republican" considered "viable" by the DUmmies needs to be prevented from getting the presidential nomination by REAL Republicans.]

At this point, however, because of the unprecedented fiscal, military and international challenges the federal government will face, Democrats need to insist on some kind of "government of national unity" -- in other words, the appointment of a Democratic vice president. The only Democrat with the stature to be vice president under those circumstances is Al Gore, both because of his experience as vice president and because he actually won the popular vote in 2000.

[This fantasy scenario will only happen with the proper astological alignment. Namely Uranus must be aligned in front of your face.]

You may disagree with this analysis and proposed administration, but I hope you'll agree that it's time for progressive Democrats to look ahead and begin planning for the post-Bush administration.

[How about the more modest goal of planning for your institutionalization, DUmmie HamdenRice ? And now on to the other DUmmie comments...]

powell is an asshole solidly in the bush pocket and the world knows he is a liar who likes to advance his own interests ... existing patriotic feelings in powell? NONE! so, why get rid of an asshole to put in place another asshole? sorry for the foul language. i have no other way to express my utter contempt for powell.

[Nice to see you get all worked up over a fantasy that WON'T be happening in this Reality.]

I don't disagree at all ... but the point is, that the Republicans will control the successor to Bush-Cheney. Powell lied about the war, but he has bee furiously apologizing and leaking his embarrassment ever since he left office. Surely you can see he is positioning himself for the succession?

[Yeah. Powell has nothing better to do with his time than planning for a DUmmie Fantasy scenario that WON'T be happening.]

republicans would never vote for GORE and on principle GORE should not stand with any republican in a ticket nor take second place to it. he would be another asshole if he, for a second time, would willingly accommodate the assholes.

[How noble of Gore to turn down a position that WON'T be offered to him.]

After all this national trauma, would you prefer .... Powell-McCain? Or Powell-Santorum? If we are going to control a post-Bush administration, I think we need someone in at a very high level.

[Powell-Energizer Bunny?]

i am not dreamin' republicans are not going to let go of power and control and without the bush machine to act as their backbone...neither sanctoroom nor mackane have the charisma to do what bush has done...unless they are using diebold machines, i have the feeling that even with those two running the country, much of democracy would return to these shores. although, i may be totally wrong.

[Or totally deluded for extending even the least bit of credibility to this thread.]

The succession to the presidency is defined...I don't think your scenario accounts for the fact that the Constitution was amended to provide a clearly defined succession of the Presidency. How is your scenario going to get around the 25 amendment?

[By leaning back, closing his eyes, and clicking his heels together three times while wishing real hard.]

I guess the OP thinks it would go like this: Dubya is impeached and removed from office. Cheney becomes President and appoints a VP, say, Powell Cheney is then impeached and removed from office. Powell becomes President and appoints a new VP.

[Tinkerbell?]

However, Bush will not be removed by the impeachment process. That is just a pipe dream.

[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

So who will be the post-Bush prez if not Powell?

[ET]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: alternatereality; dummies
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To: Charles Henrickson
“I ain’t no Republican,” he said. “I’m an Independent. I think they’re all crooks.”

Ah ain't no moron, Mistah Pitt. Ah sho' am willin' to be edumacated by you all."

101 posted on 12/29/2005 2:29:06 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: Charles Henrickson

Maybe I should have asked for Li'l Abner when I called those Boston bars.


102 posted on 12/29/2005 2:37:42 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

Or Forrest Gump.


103 posted on 12/29/2005 2:43:04 PM PST by Choose Ye This Day (Win the war. Confirm the judges. Cut the taxes. Control the spending. Secure the border.)
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To: PJ-Comix; Charles Henrickson
All I can say is...


...the Moonbats are alive and well!

104 posted on 12/29/2005 2:45:54 PM PST by LUV W (Everyone that doesn't like what America and President Bush has done for Iraq can all go to HELL.-BD)
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To: PJ-Comix

Rumsfield


105 posted on 12/29/2005 2:46:41 PM PST by CONSERVE
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To: PJ-Comix

Pathological.


106 posted on 12/29/2005 2:47:42 PM PST by HitmanLV (Listen to my demos for Savage Nation contest: http://www.geocities.com/mr_vinnie_vegas/index.html)
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To: HitmanNY
Pitt has also put this bogus anecdotal story on his appropriately named Truthout SITE. Of course, Pitt, despite even naysayers in DUmmieland has given no clue as to where this anecdotal Ty could be located.
107 posted on 12/29/2005 2:50:39 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: Choose Ye This Day
Even the DUmmies have trouble swallowing Pitt's bogus story. Here is a quote from Reply #42 on that thread:

I don't beleive a word of it. But it's truth nonetheless.

Also Reply #53:

i'm glad i'm not the only person in the liar's club. i'm a little irked we can't be trusted to read properly labeled fiction. will, c'mon, some of us have been in bars w. actual bouncers from new orleans IN new orleans. there's nothing wrong w. parables, even jesus told parables, but i'm uncomfortable w. crossing the line into fiction w.out proper notice. we'd be really peeved if the wingnuts tried to pretend a tall tale was a true story. is this a test?

108 posted on 12/29/2005 2:58:06 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

I think Ty=a neck tie, possibly one the Pittster got for Christmas when he was experiencing the miracle of the Three Days of Sobriety, then, he either started experiencing the DT's and began talking to his tie, thinking he was actually at his favorite local pub, or he fell off the wagon so fast and so hard, the bricks who are his usual drinking buddies were nowhere to be found.

Since "Ty" is a "Bush supporter" it's possible this was a Rush Limbaugh tie one of his buddies gave him as a prank some years ago, when he still had friends that weren't inanimate objects.

If we all imagine this really, really hard, we can make it true reality and win the $10,000 the Pittster has put up for anyone who can prove "Ty" isn't real.

Well, of course, "Ty" is real. Neckties are very real things.


109 posted on 12/29/2005 3:33:09 PM PST by Duke Nukum (To thine own self be true...or relatively true. --Guy Caballero)
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To: Choose Ye This Day; PJ-Comix

This is great.


Time for popcorn.


110 posted on 12/29/2005 4:19:53 PM PST by commonguymd (Momentum)
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To: Charles Henrickson; All
NEWSFLASH!!! A little while ago I got a phone call from Ty. He works at one of the bars I called. I guess several others called there too and the bar was reluctant to affirm that he worked there when I called but gave Ty my number. Anyway, I told him Pitt posted an EXTENSIVE version of a conversation he had with Ty and began reading some of it to Ty. However, the phone connection was bad and he said he would call me soon on a landline. Just in case I printed out the Pitt anecdote and will read it to Ty outside where my cell phone has better reception. Waiting now for his callback.

BTW, Ty has a mild Southern accent, not the thick drawl that Pitt indicated. Waiting now for his call.

111 posted on 12/29/2005 4:26:19 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix
lmao. Probably Pitt calling you faking a southern accent. His pompousity will eventually shine through. Let him know that Will makes him sound like a dumbass Bushbot.
112 posted on 12/29/2005 4:28:57 PM PST by commonguymd (Momentum)
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To: PJ-Comix

If Will Pitt was half as smart as he thinks he is, he would know that Republicans disagree with things Bush has done regularly. That doesn't mean they are going to vote for John Kerry or Howard Dean though.


113 posted on 12/29/2005 4:31:10 PM PST by Democratshavenobrains
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To: commonguymd

No. I am sure it was Ty because I called the bar. I NEVER mentioned Pitt's name when I called the bar so there is no way Pitt would have been alerted. Also I can spot phony Southern accents.


114 posted on 12/29/2005 4:31:14 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

munch munch munch...

All one has to do is read how Will Pitt recounts a conversation with a dumb hick.

I admire your efforts.


115 posted on 12/29/2005 4:32:51 PM PST by commonguymd (Momentum)
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To: commonguymd

Still waiting for the call. He said he was going to call from home. In any event I did alert him about the recreated conversation that Pitt posted. Ty said he wasn't aware that Pitt posted such a conversation on the web. I am pretty sure he will check it out for himself.


116 posted on 12/29/2005 4:36:36 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

If he has half a brain he will read that and see that Will talks about him like he is a rube. Maybe he is a rube - who knows.


117 posted on 12/29/2005 4:40:22 PM PST by commonguymd (Momentum)
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To: commonguymd
Maybe he is a rube - who knows.

Actually he didn't sound at all like a rube. He has only a slight drawl not the thick rube drawl that Pitt indicated.

118 posted on 12/29/2005 4:43:55 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix
I went back to my beer. Drip, drip, drip.

He spilled his beer all over himself?

119 posted on 12/29/2005 4:44:33 PM PST by Roscoe Karns
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To: Roscoe Karns

Still waiting for the call. In any event, I am sure Ty will find out what Pitt has been saying about him and how he has been portrayed.


120 posted on 12/29/2005 4:48:23 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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