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DUmmie FUnnies 07-26-07 ("How do the White House insiders manage to remain calm?")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | 07-26-07 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 07/26/2007 5:31:57 AM PDT by PJ-Comix

How do they do that? I mean the EVIL Bush Regime is running a vast fascistic empire based on complete lies and yet they remain absolutely CALM in the face of congressional investigations. Why don't any of them crack and just admit to at least one of their many conspiracies starting with MIHOP. Oooh! Oooh! It is just sooooo frusgtrating that not ONE member of this regime shows the slightest strain under the pressure. This is the attitude of the DUmmies as presented in this THREAD frustratingly titled, "How do the White House insiders manage to remain calm?" It absolutely ASTOUNDS them that no one in the White House has cracked. So let us now watch the DUmmies spin their intricate conspiracy theories in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, in his first DUFU posting from his new semi-pastoral subtropical townhouse abode, is in the [brackets]:

How do the White House insiders manage to remain calm?

[Could it be that they are INNOCENT of committing numerous conspiratorial crimes? Naw! That's too far-fetched.]

Wouldn't a normal person have buckled under the pressure? How is it that the Bush insiders manage to keep their cool, when any normal person would recognize the incredible trouble they're in? How do they do it? Are they on drugs? Does anybody else think it's incredibly odd that we have public officials in this country that can do so much wrong and yet they act like you were the one who farted?

[And your fart smells like DUmmie meds.]

Drugs.... and off-shore bank accounts.

[Karl Rove always hits the crack pipe before visiting his Cayman Island accounts.]

Lots and lots of Oxycontin and Xanax.

[Only the tip of the meds iceberg where DUmmies are concerned.]

serious tranquilizers regular valium and all those --pam drugs. (Lorazipam, etc.) Or what the doc calls "chill pills".

[DUmmie meds expertise kicking in here.]

Some of those pills would make them look too sleepy. Did Gonzo look sleepy during his testimony?

[He had a stash of uppers hidden in his waistpack.]

They never made me sleepy; they just calmed my panic attacks.

[First hand DUmmie knowledge on the topic of meds.]

Well, to be fair, they really don't need much medication since ... their consciences are so atrophied. Smirk needs 'em to supplement his narcissistic supply ... where merely not being on stage causes him anxieties.

[The DUmmies believe that Smirk is really drinking not-so-near beer.]

they have more and better drugs than you and i will ever have.

[Jealous?]

Knowing you will waltz out of the White House with millions in a Nassau bank tend to soothe nerves.

[Plus the knowledge that you have destroyed the environment does have a very therapeutic effect.]

Which one was it that mentioned they're all heavy "Ambien" users, awhile back?

[Bob Dole mentioned that he was a Viagra user from way back.]

Colin Powell: "Yes. Well, I wouldn't call them that. They're a wonderful medication -- not medication. How would you call it? They're called Ambien, which is very good. You don't use Ambien? Everybody here uses Ambien."

[A Colin Powell product endorsement.]

I suspect in some undisclosed location there's a very large pile of dead prostitutes.

[Notice that new mound behind the White House? I bet you thought it was mere dirt in there. Hee! Hee!]

Gannon was lucky. We got him out, so to speak, before the slaughter.

[Oh yes, we remember Jeff Gannon. For a couple of weeks early in 2005, the DUmmies were popping their champagne bottles in the expectation that he would somehow bring down the entire EVIL Bush Regime.]

In this day of cellphones with camera options, no one can catch these people showing a sign of weakness? Are all their public appearances measured?

[Why? Oh WHY has not one of them cracked and confessed to the many conspiratorial crimes we have dreamt up in our imaginations?]

Nothing of consequence will ever happen to them. None of them will ever see a day of jail time. Why would they be worried?

[Damn! They're getting off scot free!]

All the death and destruction they are unleashing is just simply necessary to what they envision to be their end goal.

[The incarceration of all DUmmies in Wal-Mart detention centers.]

Just look at all those WH officials behind bars..oh wait...there are none...

[Hee! Hee! Scooter Libby was just minutes away from being frog walked into the can but that was stopped just in time. Freudenschade, baby!]

And, apparently, they are sustained by a network or circle that we don't even understand or never see. Somewhere in their lives, they cut away from the rest of us and decided that they were entitled to live by a separate set of rules. And then, they make it up as they go along.

[Good news, DUmmies! You can now form your own exclusive secret network---the Illiteratti.]

What keeps them in a position of confidence is having an overview of the grand chessboard. They know what the end-game is and we don't. And while we are beating up on one of their pawns like Alberto the Liar, they are moving other pieces around the board and cementing their grip on power in ways that won't even become apparent till well after they are a fait accompli. There is a reason that they are the most secretive bunch to ever slink into power. They have so much to hide.

[While we allow you the temporary joy of a check, you are really being manipulated into a checkmate leading to the Wal-Mart detention center.]

Because WE are the ones in trouble. They sleep comfortably wrapped in their flags and currency. I'm broke. They're not.

[You're DUmb. They're not.]

They believe that they are right. They believe they are doing God's work. They believe that if they turn left, and the rest of the world turns right, everyone is wrong-but not them. They believe if they just keep believing and deceiving, they will prevail. When Reagan died, one of the big questions that was asked was what was Reagan's legacy. This is the legacy of Reagan. This is what he set in motion, all those years ago. This is what he wanted and couldn't get. It took the attacks in September, 2001, to make all this possible. If I could get my hands on Bin Laden, I rip him to tiny pieces.

[Not for killing thousands of people but because he enabled Republicans.]

self deleted

[At this point, the wisest post a DUmmie could make.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: dummies
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I still can't get over how restful my new place is. EVERY night I get over 8 hours of REFRESHING sleep. Before only 5 to 6 hours of sleep interrupted a least a half dozen times. I am wondering if the new overhead fan in the bedroom has something to do with this.

Let me know if you want on the DUmmie FUnnies PING List.

1 posted on 07/26/2007 5:32:00 AM PDT by PJ-Comix
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To: Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; tje; ml1954; ...

PING!


2 posted on 07/26/2007 5:33:15 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

Top this!


3 posted on 07/26/2007 5:41:19 AM PDT by Incorrigible (If I lead, follow me; If I pause, push me; If I retreat, kill me.)
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To: Incorrigible

LONGEST first reply ever. About 9 minutes.


4 posted on 07/26/2007 5:43:09 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix
If I could get my hands on Bin Laden, I rip him to tiny pieces.

Gasp. Could this DUmmie actually be admitting that bin laden, and not Pres. Bush, caused 9-11?

Naaaa...

5 posted on 07/26/2007 5:44:03 AM PDT by gate2wire
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To: PJ-Comix
These folks are so ignorant I’m surprised they can feed themselves.
6 posted on 07/26/2007 5:44:22 AM PDT by Vision ("Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him." Jeremiah 17:7)
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To: PJ-Comix

How? It’s inner peace, you hippie bastards.

Top 10


7 posted on 07/26/2007 5:47:34 AM PDT by NeoCaveman (Dems '08 choices are a Manly woman, a Womanly man, or a Child Senator)
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To: gate2wire

Hes just whining becuase to him, Bin Laden’s minor attack on America allowed evil Bush to do things he disagrees with.


8 posted on 07/26/2007 5:50:37 AM PDT by Democratshavenobrains
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To: PJ-Comix
What keeps them in a position of confidence is having an overview of the grand chessboard. They know what the end-game is and we don't.

This DUmmie has inadvertently hit upon the truth. They can't see beyond there next hit of drugs, their next shot of whiskey, or their next lay.

Lemme give it to them in one word, "Survival". That's what the White House sees, and they don't.

9 posted on 07/26/2007 5:51:43 AM PDT by chesley (Where's the omelet? -- Orwell)
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To: PJ-Comix
And, apparently, they are sustained by a network or circle that we don't even understand or never see.

It's the CFR, the Bildebergers, the Trilateral Commission, the Vatican, the Jews or "bankers" as they are sometimes called, and the National Football League. There I think I covered all the bases.

10 posted on 07/26/2007 5:53:29 AM PDT by NeoCaveman (Dems '08 choices are a Manly woman, a Womanly man, or a Child Senator)
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To: PJ-Comix

Probably all that hard work from moving that lets you sleep well, it sure works for me that way.


11 posted on 07/26/2007 5:53:52 AM PDT by Abathar (Proudly catching hell for posting without reading the article since 2004)
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To: PJ-Comix

top ten business posts


12 posted on 07/26/2007 5:54:18 AM PDT by Mercat
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To: PJ-Comix

Top 20. I’m laughing at their knowledge of drugs. They mention stuff I’ve never heard of before.

PJ, are you sure someone hasn’t slipped you some Ambien? LOL!


13 posted on 07/26/2007 5:56:54 AM PDT by samiam1972 (http://imrunningforpresident.blogspot.com/)
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To: PJ-Comix

Glad you like your new place. ;9)


14 posted on 07/26/2007 5:57:18 AM PDT by Ditter
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To: NeoCaveman

Inner peace born from actually growing into adulthood.


15 posted on 07/26/2007 6:03:03 AM PDT by Cletus.D.Yokel (Liberalism is arrested development on a grand scale.)
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To: NeoCaveman

OWO?


16 posted on 07/26/2007 6:04:03 AM PDT by Cletus.D.Yokel
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To: PJ-Comix
And, apparently, they are sustained by a network or circle that we don't even understand or never see.

We call it the "Amazing Grace" Network, and the DUmmies are just jealous because they were assigned pitchforks instead of halos. ;-)

17 posted on 07/26/2007 6:04:38 AM PDT by piasa (Attitude Adjustments Offered Here Free of Charge)
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To: Vision
These folks are so ignorant I’m surprised they can feed themselves.

They can't, which is why schools offer breakfast, lunch and dinner programs.

18 posted on 07/26/2007 6:06:55 AM PDT by piasa (Attitude Adjustments Offered Here Free of Charge)
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To: PJ-Comix
And while we are beating up on one of their pawns like Alberto the Liar, they are moving other pieces around the board and cementing their grip on power in ways that won't even become apparent till well after they are a fait accompli.

By the way, have you seen our newest bunker buster?

19 posted on 07/26/2007 6:10:17 AM PDT by piasa (Attitude Adjustments Offered Here Free of Charge)
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To: NeoCaveman

You left out the NRA.


20 posted on 07/26/2007 6:11:18 AM PDT by piasa (Attitude Adjustments Offered Here Free of Charge)
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