A Tale of Two Coyotes...

Reaganite Republican ^ | July 25, 2012 | Reaganite Republican

[Reaganite Republican]

CALIFORNIA

The Governor of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks the Governor's dog, then bites the Governor.

1.The Governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon the movie Bambi and then realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural.

2.He calls animal control. Animal Control captures the coyote and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases and $500 for relocating it.

3.He calls a veterinarian. The vet collects the dead dog and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases.

4. The Governor goes to hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for diseases from the coyote and on getting his bite wound bandaged.

5. The running trail gets shut down for 6 months while Fish & Game conducts a $100,000 survey to make sure the area is now free of dangerous animals.

6. The Governor spends $50,000 in state funds implementing a 'coyote awareness program' for residents of the area.

7. The CA State Legislature spends $2 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world.

8. The Governor's security agent is fired for not stopping the attack. The State spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training re. The Nature Of Coyotes

9. PETA protests the coyote's relocation and files a $5 million suit against the State.

TEXAS

The Governor of Texas is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks his dog.

1.   The Governor shoots the coyote with his State-issued pistol and keeps jogging. The Governor has spent $0.50 on a .45 ACP hollow point cartridge.

2.   The Buzzards eat the dead coyote.

And that -in a nutshell- is why 

California is broke and Texas is not !!!

h/t  Speedunque

[Reaganite Republican]

*** PING ***

[sockmonkey]

Well, actually it was the Texas Governor’s jogging pistol,
a Ruger LCP and the ammo was Hornady Critical Defense in .380..
No use for overkill.

[thackney]

It was not state issued, and is a 38, not 45.

[webheart]

10) The fired security agent sues over wrongful termination and is reinstated with back pay and given a promotion, along with an undisclosed settlement amount.

11) The PETA lawsuit is settled out of court after a protracted multi-year battle over venues and jurisdiction. The settlement includes all attorney fees for both sides, as well as a settlement which is a significant fraction of what they sued for originally, and even though it isn’t quite 30 million, it comes very close after accounting for court costs.

[webheart]

10) The fired security agent sues over wrongful termination and is reinstated with back pay and given a promotion, along with an undisclosed settlement amount.

11) The PETA lawsuit is settled out of court after a protracted multi-year battle over venues and jurisdiction. The settlement includes all attorney fees for both sides, as well as a settlement which is a significant fraction of what they sued for originally, and even though it isn’t quite 30 million, it comes very close after accounting for court costs.

[Reaganite Republican]

The story as I received it was generic ‘governors’, I just added the Perry pic because I liked it and since the topic was shooting coyotes he’s obviously the inspiration at minimum lol