Posted on 05/20/2011 8:31:24 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
I’m not going to lie to you guys but doing this research was less fun and more confusing. Confusing because most of the infallible proof that they had revolved around numbers. Numbers, it seems to me, that were just made up to prove fact. Essentially it’s around the same logic as this:
My name has five letters.
There are four seasons.
5-4=1
1 is the purest number.
Therefore I am the second coming of Christ.
Alright, it might not be that crazy, but it’s almost there. And keep your panties on people, I do not believe that I’m the second coming of Christ. Although I do think that turning water into wine would be awesome. Would it be a fine full bodied Merlot or a crisp Riesling?
Alright, so the actual numbers. Keep in mind the numbers that they start off with are all kind of made up- they argue that they got these numbers because God wanted them to receive them around now. 7! Oh sorry, did I startle you? God was just sending me a number.
According to the ambassadors, they have discovered that the great flood that Noah had to deal with was 4990 B.C. In the Bible it also said that God told Noah that he had seven days before the great flood.
Elsewhere in the Bible (2 Peter 3:8) one day to God equals 7000 years to us. Which was really the whole defense of the Scopes trial and led to some sweet monologin’ in Inherit the Wind.
OK, so 7000 years after 4990 B.C. is 2011. Then if you add in the leap years and what not it rounds up to May 21st, 2011. Or something.
So their other proof is going up from the exact date of the crucifixtion, which according to them is April 1st, 33 A.D. Was that the first April Fools Day joke? ‘Cause in that case, April Fools should technically be April 3rd, because everyone was all like “Christ is dead!” and then He was all like “No I ain’t B*tches! April Fools!” I don’t care if you just found that blasphemous. Jesus Christ playing pranks is hilarious. "You're blind! April Fools! Now you can see! LOLz, guys!"
Back to the numbers. After April 1st, 33 A.D. there are 722,500 days until May 21st. Why is the number 722,500 important? It isn’t! Yay arbitration!
To the folks at Family Radio, the number 722,500 is represented by the equation 5x10x17x5x10x17, which are symbolic numbers. 5 means atonement, 10 means completeness and 17 means heaven. And then you do that twice? Hey, why not!
Then there’s the theory that between April 1st, 33 A.D. and April 1st 2011 is 1,978 years. Then you multiply that by the number of days in a solar year (365.2422 days) and then add 51 days (because that’s how many days are between April 1st and May 21st) and you get 722,500. INDISPUTABLE EVIDENCE, PEOPLE!
So anyway, that's the proof that the Bible tells you. In any case, there's still a chance we're all doomed on Saturday (or at least 2012 for that matter - it's totally going to happen). So there's only one question left to ask.
What would you listen to as humanity came to an end? Hard rock? Classical? Something on the lighter side?
Here's a list of ideas (list yours below):
1. Tchaikovsky, 1812 Overture (Finale)
2. R.E.M. - It's The End Of The World
3. Paula Cole - I Don't Want To Wait (Dawson's Creek Opening Titles)
4. Europe - The Final Countdown
5. Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds - Death Is Not The End
6. Aerosmith - I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing (From Armageddon)
7. Rolling Stones - Gimme Shelter
8. Metallica - Four Horsemen
9. The Doors - The End
10. Van Halen - Runnin' With The Devil
11. AC/DC- Highway To Hell Music
12. Skeeter Davis - The End Of The World
13. U2 - Until The End Of The World
14. Muse - Apocalypse Please
15. Elvis Costello - Waiting For The End Of The World
16. Morrissey - Everyday Is Like Sunday
17. Talking Heads - Nothin' But Flowers
18. Bright Eyes - Four Winds
19. Prince - 1999
20. The Clash - London Calling
21. Britney Spears - Till The World Ends
Damn! :-(
(((ping)))
On a road through a desert in Arizona, a preacher named Nathaniel Evans walked every day, preaching to the many people who roared past in their cars.
“Repent, the End of the World is Nigh!” was his constant theme.
One day, as he was walking, he came to a big lever in the middle of nowhere, just by the side of the road. ‘Pull this to end the world’ said the sign on it.
Now Nathaniel saw this as the perfect spot for him to preach, and soon many automobiles were parked nearby, the people all swayed by his powerful elocution.
All was well, until there were so many people, and so many cars, that the road was nearly blocked. Then a big 18-wheel rig came down the highway, and couldn’t stop in time. The driver had a choice: run over Nathaniel, or run over the Lever.
As the driver explained to the Highway Patrol later, he actually had no choice. Pointing to the red smear on the road that used to be Nathaniel Evans, he said “Better Nate than Lever.”
For tonight: Eve of Destruction http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ki2xMUsv-y8
Not really silly, but the first time I ever heard REM’s song was in my first year of architecture grad school moments before we were to turn in our projects for critique. Needless to say, the crits did not go well.
My little dog was chewing on somthing out in the back yard.
I went out and saw it was a shingle.
I said, “What are you eating?”
He replied, “Roof”
Realizing my dog had grasped the English language, I asked him, “When will Jesus return?”
He replied, “No one but our Father in heaven knows the date or time, it could happen in the next second or in one thousand years.”
I said to him, “My faith is Christ remains as always. I am ready. Let God’s will be done.”
He said, “Mine too, but can I have another dog cookie for being honest?”
I gave him one.
Isaiah 26:19 (KJV) Thy dead [men] shall live, [together with] my dead body shall they arise.
Awake and sing, ye that dwell in dust: for thy dew [is as] the dew of herbs, and the earth shall cast out the dead.
Zombie warning level: RED
Before I got to your list of songs, the first one to come to mind was Gimme Shelter.
Blue Oyster Cult — Don’t Fear the Reaper
I've always thought that song needed a little more of something, but I can't figure out exactly what...
How do we know it's 30 hours? Do we know what time zone this is kicking off in? Is it going by Greenwich? Israel? Inquiring minds want to know.
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