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(-:(-:(-:THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD:-):-):-)
1-11-13 | Lucky9teen

Posted on 01/11/2013 4:24:19 AM PST by Lucky9teen






A guy cruises thru a stop sign and gets pulled over by a local policeman. Guy hands the cop his driver’s license, insurance verification, plus his concealed carry permit.

“Okay, Mr. Smith,” the cop says. “I see your CCW permit. Are you carrying today?”

“Yes, I am.”

“Well then, better tell me what you got.”

Smith says, “Well, I got a .357 revolver in my inside coat pocket. There’s a 9mm semi-auto in the glove box. And, I’ve got a .22 magnum derringer in my right boot.”

“Okay,” the cop says. “Anything else?”

“Yeah, back in the trunk, there’s an AR15 and a shotgun. That’s about it.”

“Mr. Smith, are you on your way to or from a gun range...?”

“Nope.”

“Well then, what are you afraid of...?”

“Not a damn thing...”






Identify this:

This is a picture of:

1.) A 3-year-old's drawing of mountains

2.) Deep thoughts of a suicidal Slinky

3.) An abstract doodle of boobies

4.) Obama's Treasury Secretary nominee's signature








"Are you a Leftwing, Conservative or A Redneck"?

Here is a little test that will help you decide

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you.

You are carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

What do you do?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Leftwing's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor! Or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think? What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is this street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing!

I need to discuss with some friends over a latte and try to come to a consensus.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Conservative's Answer:

BANG!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Redneck's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click....
(sounds of reloading)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click

Daughter:' Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?'

Son:' You got him, Pop! Can I shoot the next one?'

Wife:' You are not taking that to the taxidermist!


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: 2ndamendment; guns; ofst; silliness
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To: Arrowhead1952

Look at 37


41 posted on 01/11/2013 6:39:37 AM PST by JRios1968 (I'm guttery and trashy, with a hint of lemon. - Laz)
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To: Arrowhead1952
The only reason I posted that

Did I sound like I was complaining?

I hope I didn't sound like I was complaining.

:-D

42 posted on 01/11/2013 6:43:00 AM PST by ArGee (Reality - what a concept.)
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To: ArGee
More pictures of her Here. Enjoy!!
43 posted on 01/11/2013 6:45:56 AM PST by Arrowhead1952 (0 bummer inherited a worse economy in 2012 than he did in 2008.)
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To: Lucky9teen

Top 50 TGIF!!!!!


44 posted on 01/11/2013 6:50:49 AM PST by Currentriverrat (People are calling our President the Fresh Prince of Bill Ayers, that's not allowed is it?)
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To: Lucky9teen

It’s Friday! Happy Happy Joy Joy!


45 posted on 01/11/2013 7:08:41 AM PST by jag.drafting
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To: Lucky9teen

46 posted on 01/11/2013 7:12:19 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: Currentriverrat

In before page 2 silliness!


47 posted on 01/11/2013 7:20:08 AM PST by CSM (Keeper of the Dave Ramsey Ping list. FReepmail me if you want your beeber stuned.)
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To: Lucky9teen

48 posted on 01/11/2013 7:21:39 AM PST by Liberty Valance (Keep a simple manner for a happy life :o)
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To: ArGee
One of the longest OFST threads on record - almost 1500 posts

I remember that one... heck... you and I were just kids... I think this is a photo of us from that day...


49 posted on 01/11/2013 7:22:11 AM PST by r-q-tek86 ("It doesn't matter how smart you are if you don't stop and think" - Dr. Sowell)
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To: Liberty Valance

Dr Seuss VS Shakespeare. Epic Rap Battles of History #12 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3w2MTXBebg


50 posted on 01/11/2013 7:26:32 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: Lucky9teen

Master Chief vs Leonidas. Epic Rap Battles of History Season 2. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgVwv0ZuPhM


51 posted on 01/11/2013 7:27:45 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: JRios1968

Einstein vs Stephen Hawking -Epic Rap Battles of History #7 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zn7-fVtT16k


52 posted on 01/11/2013 7:28:45 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: Lucky9teen

And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the earth.

Then he made the earth round.

And he laughed and laughed and laughed.


53 posted on 01/11/2013 7:29:50 AM PST by Twotone (Marte Et Clypeo)
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To: Lucky9teen

54 posted on 01/11/2013 7:33:05 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: Currentriverrat

55 posted on 01/11/2013 7:34:51 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: r-q-tek86

“As soon as we’re out, we’re kickin’ our way back in...” Uncle Tupelo circa 1990


56 posted on 01/11/2013 7:37:00 AM PST by waterhill (I Shall Remain, in spite of __________.)
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To: Lucky9teen
I LOVE FRIDAYS!!
57 posted on 01/11/2013 7:39:37 AM PST by wyokostur
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To: fredhead

A Redneck Love Poem

Susie Lee done fell in love,
She planned to marry Joe.
She was so happy ‘bout it all,
She told her Pappy so.

Pappy told her, Susie Gal,
You’ll have to find another.
I’d just as soon yo’ ma don’t know,
But Joe is yo’ half brother.

So Susie put aside her Joe
And planned to marry Will.
But after telling Pappy this,
He said, there’s trouble still.

You can’t marry Will, my gal,
And please don’t tell yo’ mother.
But Will and Joe, and several mo’
I know is yo’ half brother.

But Mama knew and said, my child,
Just do what makes yo’ happy.
Marry Will or marry Joe;
You ain’t no kin to Pappy!


58 posted on 01/11/2013 7:42:07 AM PST by Twotone (Marte Et Clypeo)
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To: Lucky9teen

59 posted on 01/11/2013 7:42:07 AM PST by wyokostur
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To: waterhill
It's silly seeing you here. LOL!


60 posted on 01/11/2013 7:46:37 AM PST by Envisioning (Call me a racist........, one more time..........)
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