***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD***

[Lucky9teen]

It's all about the timing...

Never have I seen such commitment to photobombing as this woman's.

Yes, penguins have rocket propelled poop. You won't learn that on Discovery Channel.

He wanted soda. He got soda. To the faaaaaaaaace!!!!

Not sure what exactly is going on here, but $100 says that alcohol was involved.

A painful bee sting is the price you've got to pay for a photo as awesome as this.

"Pleased to meet you, concrete."

"It is the last time you'll sh*t on me!"

His thoughts became a shadow.

"CRATE-ZIRRA!"

Little did Gary know that the right combination of Coors Light, beef jerky and Molly Hatchet
was all it took to summon the ancient fire god of Hawkins county.

Probably not the new Facebook profile photo they were hoping for.

Enjoy your new broken camera.

One of these cats will pee on your couch.

[ErnBatavia]

[Arrowhead1952]

I wonder what senator fine swine would think of the pneumatic nail gun my neighbor has, since it hold over 50 nail clips.

[foundedonpurpose]

I bought a new
Ford F250 Tri-Flex Fuel Truck.
Go figure it runs on either hydrogen,
gasoline, or E85.I returned to the dealer
yesterdayBecause I couldn’t get the radio to work.
The service
technician explained that the radio was voice activated.
‘Nelson,’ the
technician said to the radio.The radio replied, ‘Ricky or
Willie?’
‘Willie!’ he
continued and ‘On The Road Again’
Came from the
speakers.
Then he said,
‘Ray Charles!’, and in an instant
‘ Georgia On My
Mind’ replaced Willie Nelson.I drove away happy, and for the next few
days,
Every time I’d
say, ‘Beethoven,’
I’d get beautiful
classical music, and if I said,
‘Beatles,’ I’d
get one of their awesome songs.
Yesterday,
some guy ran a red light
And nearly
creamed my new truck,
But I swerved in
time to avoid him.
I yelled,
‘***!’
Immediately the
radio responded with,
Ladies and
gentlemen,
The
President of The
United
States, Barack Obama
Damn I love this
truck . . ..

[foundedonpurpose]

As I was lying in bed pondering the
problems of the world, I rapidly realized that I don’t really give a rat’s
***.

It’s the tortoise
life for me!
1. If walking/cycling is good for your health, my postman would be
immortal.
2. A whale
swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water, and nevertheless is still
fat.
3. A rabbit runs, dashes and hops and is a vegetarian and only
lives 15 years.
4. A tortoise doesn’t run or walk and barely moves, yet it lives for 250 years.

And you tell me to exercise??
I don’t think so. I’m retired. Go around me!

[4yearlurker]

Abuse is down the hall stupid git!

[foundedonpurpose]

An old man and his wife are taking a Sunday drive in the mountains and
see a rabbit jump out across the middle of the road. He swerves to avoid
hitting it, but unfortunately the rabbit jumps right in front of the car.

The driver and his wife pull over and gets out to see what has become of the
rabbit. Much to his dismay, the rabbit is dead.

The wife pulls out a spray can. She walks over to the limp, dead rabbit, bends
down, and sprays the contents onto the rabbit.

The rabbit jumps up, waves its paw at the two of them and hops off down the
road. Ten feet away the rabbit stops, turns around and waves again, he hops
down the road another 10 feet, turns and waves, hops another ten feet, turns
and waves, and repeats this again and again and again, until he hops out of
sight.

The man is astonished. He runs asks his wife, “What is in that can? What did
you spray on that rabbit?”

The wife turns the can around so that her husband can read the label. It
says...

“Hair Spray – Restores life to dead hair, and adds permanent wave.”

[ZirconEncrustedTweezers]

Don’t give me that, you snotty-faced heap of parrot droppings!!

[fredhead]

[llevrok]

alright! ALRIGHT!!!!!

If you kids don’t stop arguing, I’ll have to turn this thread around and drop you off at The Daily Kos!!!

[4yearlurker]

Well,I’m sorry...Times up for your argument.

No it’s not!

[Rummyfan]

LOL thanks!

[ZirconEncrustedTweezers]

YOU wanna complain? Look at these shoes! I’ve only had ‘em three weeks and the heels are worn right through.

[llevrok]

You meet two engineers for the first time.

One is extroverted and the other is not.

How can you tell which is which ?

The extroverted one stares down at your shoes.

[ArGee]

That's good, but put your hands like this and say "Waaaaaah." Let's try again. <bop>

[ArGee]

Well SHE started it.

[ZirconEncrustedTweezers]

But I want to complain!

[ArGee]

Oh, that’s next door. It’s being hit on the head lessons in here.

[envisio]

.

[fredhead]

STOP TOUCHING ME!!!! HE’S TOUCHING ME!!!!!!

MINE!!! MINE!!! MINE!!!

[llevrok]

Ok, you three!!!!!!
When we get home, your mother will deal with the 3 of you.