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The Rude Man of Cerne
http://www.amusingplanet.com/ ^ | June 20, 2013 | Kaushik

Posted on 06/21/2013 9:33:05 AM PDT by BO Stinkss

The Rude Man of Cerne, better known as the Cerne Abbas Giant, is a giant figure of a naked man with an inappropriately erect phallus, wielding a primitive club in his right hand, made on a hill near the village of Cerne Abbas in Dorset, England. The Cerne Abbas Giant was created by carving through the turf of the hillside to a depth of approximately 30cm to reveal the underlying chalk common in this region. Measuring 55 meters in length and 50.5 meters wide, if measured from hand to hand, it is one of the largest and the most popular hillfigures in Britain. The remarkable phallus alone, including its testicles, is 11 meters long and nearly the length of its head. The Giant has been cheekily described as "Britain's most famous phallus". According to one publication, postcards of the Giant were the only indecent photographs that could be sent through the English Post Office.

Although the Cerne Abbas Giant is often thought of as an ancient creation, its history cannot be traced back further than the late 17th century. The earliest known written reference to the giant appear in a 4 November 1694 entry in the Churchwardens' Accounts from St Mary's Church in Cerne Abbas. Later references to the giant started appearing in contemporary magazines beginning in 1763.

It has been suggested that the figure originally held a cloak in its left arm and stood over a disembodied head. The cloak may have been a depiction of an animal skin, giving credence to the theory that the giant was a depiction of a hunter, or alternatively, Hercules with the skin of the Nemean lion over his arm. Additionally, reviewing historical depictions of the giant, it has been suggested that the Giant's current large erection is, in fact, the result of merging a circle representing his navel with a smaller penis during a re-cut. The lack of earlier descriptions leads modern scholars to conclude that the Giant is no older than the 17th century, and perhaps originated as political satire.

Regardless of its age, the Cerne Abbas Giant has become an important part of local culture and folklore, which often associates it with fertility. Local women who wanted to conceive would spend a night alone on the hillside, particularly within the confines of his giant phallus, and young couples would make love on the giant to ensure conception. Locals would erect a maypole on the earthwork, around which childless couples would dance to promote fertility. Sleeping on the giant was also thought to be a good way to ensure a future wedding for unmarried women.

In modern times the giant has been used for several publicity stunts and as an advertisement to promote condoms, jeans and bicycles, among numerous other things.


TOPICS: Arts/Photography
KEYWORDS: art; cerneabbasgiant; godsgravesglyphs; humor; sourcetitlenoturl; travel; unitedkingdom
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To: MHGinTN

21 posted on 06/21/2013 4:50:12 PM PDT by Oztrich Boy ("New Yorks Finest" are now "The Untouchables")
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To: rlmorel
That fellow from Cerne was quite rude,
As he paraded about in the nude.
People all loved to talk
About his club made of chalk,
And how that thing did protrude!
22 posted on 06/21/2013 5:05:14 PM PDT by Joe 6-pack (Qui me amat, amat et canem meum.)
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To: BO Stinkss

23 posted on 06/21/2013 5:24:42 PM PDT by Joe 6-pack (Qui me amat, amat et canem meum.)
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To: BO Stinkss

There was once a young man from Britain,
with whom all the young girls were smitten.
He had big junk,
he wasn’t a punk,
And all the young ladies he was hittin’.


24 posted on 06/21/2013 7:42:04 PM PDT by july4thfreedomfoundation (November 4, 2008 and November 6, 2012.....Two days that will live in infamy!)
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To: Joe 6-pack

Magnificent :)


25 posted on 06/21/2013 8:36:03 PM PDT by Manic_Episode (Some days...it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps....)
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To: rlmorel

There once was a rude man from Cerne.
For whom all the young lasses yearned.
Of his pud made of chalk
The lasses would talk.
And how he made their nether parts burn.


26 posted on 06/21/2013 8:54:04 PM PDT by Lurker (Violence is rarely the answer. But when it is it is the only answer.)
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To: StayAt HomeMother; Ernest_at_the_Beach; decimon; 1010RD; 21twelve; 24Karet; 2ndDivisionVet; ...

 GGG managers are SunkenCiv, StayAt HomeMother & Ernest_at_the_Beach
Thanks BO Stinkss.
It has been suggested that the figure originally held a cloak in its left arm and stood over a disembodied head. The cloak may have been a depiction of an animal skin, giving credence to the theory that the giant was a depiction of a hunter, or alternatively, Hercules with the skin of the Nemean lion over his arm. Additionally, reviewing historical depictions of the giant, it has been suggested that the Giant's current large erection is, in fact, the result of merging a circle representing his navel with a smaller penis during a re-cut. The lack of earlier descriptions leads modern scholars to conclude that the Giant is no older than the 17th century, and perhaps originated as political satire.
To all -- please ping me to other topics which are appropriate for the GGG list.


27 posted on 06/22/2013 6:46:52 PM PDT by SunkenCiv (McCain or Romney would have been worse, if you're a dumb ass.)
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Ogmios, the Celtic Hercules
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ogmios


28 posted on 06/22/2013 6:48:30 PM PDT by SunkenCiv (McCain or Romney would have been worse, if you're a dumb ass.)
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To: BO Stinkss; SunkenCiv; Salamander
And now a word
From the First Runner-up
In the Londo Mollari
Look-alike Contest


29 posted on 06/22/2013 7:01:34 PM PDT by shibumi (Cover it with gas and set it on fire.)
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To: shibumi

;’)


30 posted on 06/22/2013 7:03:24 PM PDT by SunkenCiv (McCain or Romney would have been worse, if you're a dumb ass.)
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To: tumblindice

He’s out and about in old Blighty
Tight whities are nowhere in sighty
He points to the sky
Heads always held high
We laugh but he’s banged Aphrodite


31 posted on 06/22/2013 8:08:42 PM PDT by Yardstick
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To: Joe 6-pack; xsmommy

Ok, if this thread wasn’t hilarious before, the Weiner head made it perfect.


32 posted on 06/23/2013 2:02:52 AM PDT by Explorer89 (And now, let the wild rumpus start!!)
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To: Explorer89

hilarious!


33 posted on 06/24/2013 4:57:45 AM PDT by xsmommy
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