Posted on 06/03/2021 9:42:37 AM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
TALLAHASSEE, FL—In a controversial move sure to cause outrage, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis signed a bill declaring that the sky is blue.
“Through sheer malice, bigotry, and hatred, I declare the sky is blue!” said DeSantis at the signing ceremony. “Maybe next I’ll declare grass to be green, enforcing myopic reality on everyone! Mwuh ha ha ha!” DeSantis then signed the bill with ink he declared to be black no matter what anyone else thought about it.
“Nooooo! Colors exist on a spectrum!” screamed an activist outside. “Who is to say the sky isn’t yellow? I guess, maybe, some sort of device that measures the wavelength and compares it to known color values, but that doesn’t override people’s lived experiences!”
DeSantis is said to be considering weighing in on other controversial, divisive topics, such as declaring that the sun is hot, water is wet, and two plus two equals four — all things PolitiFact rated as only “Half True.”
#FloridaBills
DANG!
sun is hot, water is wet, and Trump Won 2020.
Very controversial. I’m in FL and the sky is gray!
I’ve had conversations with my Mother-in-Law in which she starts by telling me it’s a nice day.
I agree with that by replying that, yes, it’s pretty sunny.
She stops me right there and corrects me. There are clouds.
I concede that perhaps it is partly cloudy.
She jumps right on that to set me straight: it is in fact a nice day and I should recognize this and stop denying it.
Thank you for that correction, Sir!
Are all the leaves brown?
Time to get a FISA warrant, appoint a special investigation, create House and Senate committees, notify the IRS, alert the district attorney for the southern district of Florida.
Democracy is at stake.
And the sky is grey
Grass is green? Not in my yard.. it's Brown. Not watering it, so it is dry. Hoping the wet season is starting... 😀
Sure am glad DeSantis is my Gov. instead of say Gavin or that Cuomo creep. And how about that crazy bitch in Michigan?
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