Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

You Know You Are A Freeper When.....
April 13, 2004 | LadyShallott

Posted on 04/13/2004 7:13:14 AM PDT by LadyShallott

You Know You Are A Freeper When......

You have family members post for you because you have lost all sensation in your right hand from to much mouse usage.

You aren't sure what this "daylight" thing is, but you know you haven't seen it since 1998.

You seriously think about ramming the car in front of you when you see a liberal bumper sticker.

You spend your time finding pictures of John Kerry & morph him into a two-headed ketchup alien.

You try to figure out a way to write a program that would allow you to make love with your spouse and read the breaking news at the same time.

When you and your spouse get into an argument it comes out "Removed by Admin. Moderator".

You asked for a wireless connection at your baby shower. Who needs a baby monitor? Watching the baby and posting is just FR practicality.

You have picked out not only your child’s name, but their screen name for future use at Free Republic.

You told your spouse you were pregnant by listing it under “Breaking News”.

You have shunned the Atkins Diet and chosen to go on the “Freeper” diet: Coffee, smokes, and target practice.

You want to sit in a cage at a PETA rally while smoking, eating a hamburger, drinking coffee and hand out Free Republic coffee mugs.

And last but not least……..

You know you are a married to a Freeper when you can talk about anything going on in the world, you display the American Flag with pride, and you pray for the Troops defending this great country. Chance 33_98, I love ya!


TOPICS: Free Republic; Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS: frclassics; freetime; lolgreatthread
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-5051-100101-150151-200 ... 251-288 next last

1 posted on 04/13/2004 7:13:15 AM PDT by LadyShallott
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: chance33_98
*Spouse Ping*
2 posted on 04/13/2004 7:14:27 AM PDT by LadyShallott ("An armed society is a polite society."~Robert A. Heinlein)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
Your family members get screennames just in order to communicate with you.

Though I guess you had that covered here:

You told your spouse you were pregnant by listing it under “Breaking News”.

;-) Good list!

3 posted on 04/13/2004 7:16:13 AM PDT by RosieCotton (Anything worth doing is worth doing badly. - G. K. Chesterton)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
You yell "PING!" to get the attention of your wife in the other room.

You tell your cats that their Little Friskies is actually made from roasted trolls.

4 posted on 04/13/2004 7:17:12 AM PDT by dirtboy (John Kerry - Hillary without the fat ankles and the FBI files...)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott

You have picked out not only your child’s name, but their screen name for future use at Free Republic.

 

You mean like this?

 

Owl_Eagle

”Unleash the Hogs of Peace.”
P.J. O'Rourke Parliament of Whores

5 posted on 04/13/2004 7:17:16 AM PDT by South Hawthorne ("Kill my boss? Dare I live the American Dream?" ~ Homer Simpson)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott; carlo3b; LadyX; Billie; ofMagog; TexasCowboy; Scuttlebutt; parsifal; Fred Mertz
I have Freeped on a 1200 baud cell phone connection, back when you paid fifty cents a minutes for a air time.

I am doing better now, my doctor tells me.
6 posted on 04/13/2004 7:17:35 AM PDT by razorback-bert
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: netmilsmom
Just for fun. :)
7 posted on 04/13/2004 7:18:18 AM PDT by LadyShallott ("An armed society is a polite society."~Robert A. Heinlein)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott

8 posted on 04/13/2004 7:19:00 AM PDT by Diogenesis (If you mess with one of us, you mess with all of us)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Owl_Eagle
waycooljunior!
9 posted on 04/13/2004 7:19:55 AM PDT by stainlessbanner
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: Owl_Eagle
LOL. That's great!
10 posted on 04/13/2004 7:19:55 AM PDT by LadyShallott ("An armed society is a polite society."~Robert A. Heinlein)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
I can't read news on a regular news site because I can't post comments and everybody deserves my opinion.
11 posted on 04/13/2004 7:20:38 AM PDT by biblewonk (The only book worth reading, and reading, and reading.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
You seriously think about ramming the car in front of you when you see a liberal bumper sticker.

LMBO!!! Not that I would know anything about this...

12 posted on 04/13/2004 7:21:19 AM PDT by retrokitten (Because nobody suspects the butterfly!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
"You seriously think about ramming the car in front of you when you see a liberal bumper sticker."

I have seen a car in the parking lot with a John Kerry campaign bumper sticker on the PAINT of the trunk. I want to slap them reeeeallly hard.
13 posted on 04/13/2004 7:22:12 AM PDT by Frank_Discussion (May the wings of Liberty never lose a feather!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
You tell your friends "I'll bump ya later on."
14 posted on 04/13/2004 7:22:34 AM PDT by Larry Lucido
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
LOL, looks good, reminds me of: You Know You Are Married To A Freeper When……
15 posted on 04/13/2004 7:24:30 AM PDT by chance33_98 (Shall a living man complain? Oh how much fewer are my sufferings than my sins;)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: chance33_98
new year, new Freeper list. :0)
16 posted on 04/13/2004 7:26:17 AM PDT by LadyShallott ("An armed society is a polite society."~Robert A. Heinlein)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 15 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
when you can't get away from the computer, no matter what time it is....

My wife has told me,
If you could only spend as much time with your kids as you do on FreeRepublic life would be better.
I chose FreeRepublic!
17 posted on 04/13/2004 7:26:26 AM PDT by The Mayor (Death separates us for a time; Christ will reunite us forever.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
You spend your time finding pictures of John Kerry & morph him into a two-headed ketchup alien.

WHO TOLD Y--!

er...I mean..."that's interesting."

18 posted on 04/13/2004 7:26:28 AM PDT by Prime Choice (Leftists claim Bush is a terrorist. So why aren't they trying to appease him?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: mhking
Ping!
19 posted on 04/13/2004 7:26:36 AM PDT by chance33_98 (Shall a living man complain? Oh how much fewer are my sufferings than my sins;)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 16 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott; martin_fierro; Constitution Day; Howlin

You're watching FOXNews and jump up and race to the P.C. when they mention a story related to a Moose or Cheese.

 

 

Owl_Eagle

”Unleash the Hogs of Peace.”
P.J. O'Rourke Parliament of Whores

20 posted on 04/13/2004 7:27:25 AM PDT by South Hawthorne ("Kill my boss? Dare I live the American Dream?" ~ Homer Simpson)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
You Know You Are A Freeper When.....

You dress up like a devil in July, not even during an election year, just to pi$$ of Hitlery Klintoon.

21 posted on 04/13/2004 7:28:11 AM PDT by Just another Joe (Monthly donors are better lovers)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
You use "hugh", "vey" and "series" in normal conversation, and wonder why people look at you funny...
22 posted on 04/13/2004 7:29:15 AM PDT by RosieCotton (Anything worth doing is worth doing badly. - G. K. Chesterton)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
You know you are a Freeper when you are watching the cable news shows and keep reaching for a Post Reply button.
23 posted on 04/13/2004 7:30:05 AM PDT by Pete
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: RosieCotton
LOL. You mean people don't talk like that?
24 posted on 04/13/2004 7:30:13 AM PDT by LadyShallott ("An armed society is a polite society."~Robert A. Heinlein)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 22 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
You notice the Bush/Cheney sticker on the bumper of the US Mail delivery vehicle and are NOT offended...

SLedgeCS

25 posted on 04/13/2004 7:32:07 AM PDT by SledgeCS (If you call me a European-American, get ready for a fight over that INSULT...)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
Heh...I've found my family (the ones that haven't yet been sucked in) get confused when I talk like that.

On the other hand...it's kinda fun to confuse 'em.
26 posted on 04/13/2004 7:32:29 AM PDT by RosieCotton (Anything worth doing is worth doing badly. - G. K. Chesterton)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 24 | View Replies]

To: Owl_Eagle
You threaten to Zot your kids when they misbehave...
27 posted on 04/13/2004 7:33:53 AM PDT by ErnBatavia (Because Democrats are liars, they assume Republicans are too...)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 20 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
You told your spouse you were pregnant by listing it under “Breaking News”.

You didn't, did you?

28 posted on 04/13/2004 7:35:01 AM PDT by Blood of Tyrants (Even if the government took all your earnings, you wouldn't be, in its eyes, a slave.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Steve0113
seen this?
29 posted on 04/13/2004 7:35:34 AM PDT by nina0113
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 26 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
You know you are a Freeper when your printer becomes a distibution point for worthy news articles!
30 posted on 04/13/2004 7:35:35 AM PDT by JoeSixPack1 (Kerry is a combat vet. But he fought for the wrong side.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: ErnBatavia
Or attempt to use "Zot" when playing Scrabble, and are amazed and upset when people don't acknowledge it as a real word!
31 posted on 04/13/2004 7:36:01 AM PDT by RosieCotton (Anything worth doing is worth doing badly. - G. K. Chesterton)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 27 | View Replies]

To: Blood of Tyrants
Actually...no. But who knows? I might just surprise him the second time. LOL
32 posted on 04/13/2004 7:36:47 AM PDT by LadyShallott ("An armed society is a polite society."~Robert A. Heinlein)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 28 | View Replies]

To: RosieCotton
And you keep confusing your guests by calling liberal politicians "maroons," too.
33 posted on 04/13/2004 7:37:40 AM PDT by jwalburg (Mr. Kerry, why did you remain in VVAW after the assassination plot meeting?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 22 | View Replies]

To: biblewonk
Good one!
34 posted on 04/13/2004 7:39:27 AM PDT by newgeezer (...until the voters discover they can vote themselves largesse from the public treasury.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 11 | View Replies]

To: RosieCotton
True story...Last week, my oldest daughter joined FR and did a search on me...just to ask if she could come over. She said I wasn't answering my e-mail or phone and she knew she could get in touch with me here.
What a great list and a great way to start the day. Thanks LS!!!!
35 posted on 04/13/2004 7:42:45 AM PDT by codyjacksmom
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: biblewonk
" I can't read news on a regular news site because I can't post comments and everybody deserves my opinion."

Har! I love this one. So true!! If only the world would listen to us.....
36 posted on 04/13/2004 7:44:06 AM PDT by Lakeside
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 11 | View Replies]

To: biblewonk
Same here! I finally got tired of seeing the MSNBC headlines delivered to my mailbox because I can't post, and I unsubscribed. Those are the folks that really need to hear my opinion!
37 posted on 04/13/2004 7:44:11 AM PDT by sarasota
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 11 | View Replies]

To: dakine
A so true Ping...
38 posted on 04/13/2004 7:45:02 AM PDT by codyjacksmom
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: jwalburg
You mean they aren't, bugs bunny will be seriously disappointed, and it could be hugh
39 posted on 04/13/2004 7:46:34 AM PDT by dts32041 ("Give me a break. I'm a male, my ESP doesn't work." 05 APR 04 Mondoman)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 33 | View Replies]

To: codyjacksmom
True story...Last week, my oldest daughter joined FR and did a search on me...just to ask if she could come over. She said I wasn't answering my e-mail or phone and she knew she could get in touch with me here.

LOL!

I can believe it, though! This place is rather addictive, to say the least!

40 posted on 04/13/2004 7:48:04 AM PDT by RosieCotton (Anything worth doing is worth doing badly. - G. K. Chesterton)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 35 | View Replies]

To: dts32041
You misspelled "seriesly". ;-)
41 posted on 04/13/2004 7:48:47 AM PDT by RosieCotton (Anything worth doing is worth doing badly. - G. K. Chesterton)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 39 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
You know you're a freeper when you say more to your spouse on FR threads than you do when you're at home with her :)
42 posted on 04/13/2004 7:51:56 AM PDT by chance33_98 (Shall a living man complain? Oh how much fewer are my sufferings than my sins;)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: chance33_98
Hey! I think we resemble that remark..I mean..of course we don't do that. :)
43 posted on 04/13/2004 7:54:33 AM PDT by LadyShallott ("An armed society is a polite society."~Robert A. Heinlein)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 42 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
You Know your a freeper when you wake up in the middle of the night and its not your prostate you just want to check breaking news to see whats up
44 posted on 04/13/2004 7:54:44 AM PDT by al baby (Hope I don't get into trouble for this)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: RosieCotton
Sometimes too addictive. My 11 yr old daughter is constantly mad at me too. The computer was her Christmas present and it's in her room. Ohhhhh, the homeland wars we have!!!! LOL
45 posted on 04/13/2004 7:55:33 AM PDT by codyjacksmom
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 40 | View Replies]

To: al baby
Or when (and I suppose I shouldn't admit this), you sit at the computer long after when you should be in bed, saying to yourself "I'll just hit refresh FOUR more times...then I'm going to bed. Really. Just...OK, maybe FIVE more times..."
46 posted on 04/13/2004 7:56:37 AM PDT by RosieCotton (Anything worth doing is worth doing badly. - G. K. Chesterton)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 44 | View Replies]

To: Diogenesis

47 posted on 04/13/2004 7:56:48 AM PDT by Joe 6-pack ("We deal in hard calibers and hot lead." - Roland Deschaines)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
>You Know You Are A Freeper When .....


... characters out of
the Wizard of Oz become
political things . . .
















48 posted on 04/13/2004 8:00:18 AM PDT by theFIRMbss
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: codyjacksmom; chance33_98
We solved that problem with four computers. I live with a computer geek who brings home computers every other month. Freep mail him. We have computers sitting in the closet. LOL. A multiple Freeper household is bliss. :)
49 posted on 04/13/2004 8:00:49 AM PDT by LadyShallott ("An armed society is a polite society."~Robert A. Heinlein)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 45 | View Replies]

To: LadyShallott
Great LIST!!
I loved Chance's too and tried posting to it but it didn't take. I tried to add...
"You know you are married to a FReeper when your wife says she couldn't get the laundry done or make dinner because Dog posted a Breaking News story on Iraq then you run to catch up on the 1000 posts."
(That has happened here twice)

>>You seriously think about ramming the car in front of you when you see a liberal bumper sticker.<<

This is a true story. One of the teachers at my daughter's charter school had a jeep covered with liberal bumperstickers. The spare tire had a cover with a big smilie face. Everytime I saw the thing I wanted to barf.
When I decided to pull Net out to home school, I had already bought 5 bumperstickers from ProtestWarriors to stick all over the giant smilie as I left. Only Dad stopped me.



50 posted on 04/13/2004 8:02:29 AM PDT by netmilsmom ("You can't fight AQ and hug Hamas" - C. Rice)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-5051-100101-150151-200 ... 251-288 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson