Skip to comments.URGENT ... HELP REQUIRED. NEED US MIL INTERMEDIARY DUE TO IMPENDING DEATH IN FAMILY(Update #111)
Posted on 11/27/2007 12:46:44 PM PST by MarineMom613
Sorry for long title and caps. I am typing thru tears. My mom is dying of pancreatic cancer. She raised my son and I got thru to Red Cross & Hospice and they approved it. Military is denying it saying she is not loco parentis. On top of that nobody knows how to do the paper work. My son is her baby (30 Year Old Marine) and she is all she wants. Seems to be holding on for him. She just took a drastic turn for the worst yesterday. I need a congressman/senator anyone who I can call and try to push this through. I am literally BEGGING. I am losing my best friend and I need My Son home but More importantly, SHE needs him. She is basically unconcious but everytime she hears a mans voice she screams out that Rob is Here Bring him to me now. Dont' know how much longer she has. Any help appreciated... Prayers too!. He has served 2 tours in Iraq and has made the Military his career and he is lost right now. Please. He is in Camp Lejuene, NC and is scheduled to go out on a training excerise tomorrow on ship. Hospice and Red Cross pushed it through and Military is pushing it somewhere else.
Anybody have ideas on who to call or how to help 613 out?
Call your Congressman and local News outlet
Can you help or have any knowledge?
At this point, I’m not sure what you can do. Your Senators, Hillary and Chuckie may be your only hope.........
Praying for strength and healing for your mom, and favor with the brass.
Have you tried your Rep in Congress, Mom? Please keep us posted. Sending prayers your way.
Prayers for you all are on the way.
Bump for MarineMom613’s mother, son, and this whole situation. I am praying for you-—have no idea how else to help but I know the Lord will lead you.
Did Veterans Affairs/NCDVA help you?
Did they tell you she wasn’t immediate family and that’s why... or what?
Hit all the representatives, in writing and call/fax.
Other links on the site:
Call the VFW and DAV at the VA to get some resources as well.
The Red Cross is responsible for verifying to the military that your mother is in poor condition. I would call the Red Cross.
I’m sending the story to Mark Levin. He’s very pro-active in contacting D.C. on the issues.
You might tell the Red Cross that he is needed as a pallbearer at her funeral—even though she is still alive at this point.
Did you tell the Red Cross that she raised your son? That your son lived with her for any length of time? Just suggestions, hope they work.
I’m so sorry. I can’t be of help, but I hope and pray that someone here will be able to assist you.
I just called the Chaplain’s office at LeJuene and they said to call RED CROSS ARMED FORCES EMERGENCY SERVICE CENTER: 1-877-272-7337.
Normally....if the Red Cross signs off...the military doesn’t argue about this. It is general military policy that grandparents don’t weigh as much as parents or brothers or sisters...I’ve seen this attitude across all the services. But once you establish that she helped to raise him...they don’t argue. I think you need the Red Cross to capitalize this comment of her bringing him up...and resubmit.
Best of luck, and God bless you and yours.
Prayers for you, mother, and much-loved son. May those who can help be led to do their utmost for you in your time of need.
MarineMom, Please call RedCross immediately. They were who we were told to call when our daughter died, and we had to get our son home. They know all the “rules”, and are the best go-to guys in a situation like this.
They got our son home within 18 hours, and sent someone to get him out of bed.
Prayers for your mom and family.
Call NCâs Senators and reps where Le June is also. The Red Cross is a good starting point, but they can only push so far. If the military is FUBARing this up, then up the chain is the only way to go. Have you tried calling the CO of Camp Le June?? I pray your son is giving leave to say good-bye. Its the least that could be done for him..considering the sacrifices you and your family are making for this country. You, your son, and family are in my prayers..And Thank you for what your family has done to serve this country. God Bless!!
have your physician or pastor write a letter to whom it may concern verifying that is parent.
Your a good man DR R
Yes, indeed. Good work.
Thanks. I’m just following the example set by my parents.
I tried calling Red Cross again just now with the case # they gave me. originally everyone thought this would go through like a piece of cake. Apparently 2 issues. I loco parentis.
She raised him, I was there but not all the time and financially able to. 2nd Nobody knows how to get this done in the offices down in Camp Lejueune. Both me and my son are inconsolable at this point. My son has served his country honorably since before 9/11 and when this happens We feel like a slap in the face. My only saving grace is my Mom is not aware what is going on. She is PRO Military and SO proud of her “Marine” Thank goodness she doesn’t know what they are doing to him. I am going to try to find a tel # in the chaplains office in Lejuene. Again, any help would be appreciated.
Lord God help this family ....reunite them in this time of great need. Father I ask for your intervention and for open doors of favor with the military and all involved. Bless and protect them Lord.
I will also say a prayer of healing for your mom.
God bless and don’t give up, God will help you.
If you have spoken with the Red Cross, I would call back and see if they can give you a "case number" or some other distinguishing identifier and then call the Base Commander's office and ask how to proceed with having his office look into granting the leave. Dr. R's phone number he posted at number twenty is also a good source, but it always helps to be able to cite the Red Cross request already made and a case number or contact person may help them find out who they are being asked to overule and why.
Oh I wish you the best of luck here! I can sincerely relate, my cousin was disallowed by the Air Force from attending our grandmother’s funeral 15 years ago as a pallbearer. As a result I had to shoulder that load with 5 much younger boys, most unrelated. 4 years later the same Air Force (under CLinton) failed to secure their base in Saudi Arabia from terrorist attack, and he was dead too, one of 19 Americans who died and one of two officers I believe. The military brass and beurocracy should support the families who support them. And they must protect their own!
As far as I understand, he won’t even be allowed leave for funeral. Anyone who has been a caretaker for a cancer victim knows about hallucinations. Hers are all about him being in Iraq. She saw him a while ago but this turn for the worst so damn fast it killing us and leaving us with our hands tied.
I won’t give up. Again, thanks for the help.
Click on this and then choose to open.
Check you FReep mail, I sent you the Chaplain’s office number.
My suggestion is to call your Congressman’s office and ask to speak to his military person- explain the situation to them. I had things that had to be worked out when my son was in Iraq- my Congressman’s office was extremely helpful. Call a local radio and/or tv station..
You, your mom and son will all be in my prayers..
and prayers for family
If this defines your situation:
Write a brief statement indicating that the ill lady meets this definition - include the applicable dates of service 'In Loco Parentis' - and get this letter counter signed by an independant witness who can attest to the 'loco parentis' declaration. Get BOTH signatures notarized.
Get a letter from the attending physician indicating that his presence would contribute to the welfare of the ill lady. (This, unfortunately is a key item. If his presence would not so contribute as certified by the attending physician then leave cannot be granted unless the lady paseses.)
Contact your local chapter of the American Red Cross, and obtain a short letter indicating that they have verified the situation.
Send a copy to your son via regular mail AND send copies to the Command OMBUDSMAN.
Please be aware that it is possible that leave may not be granted prior to her passing. This would be neither a misinterpretation of the regulations nor an abuse of power. The final decision always rests with the commanding officer. Contacting your elected representatives will be neither helpful nor effective as they have no jurisdiction in this matter and can only serve to interfere in ongoing operations and the authority of the CO.
How do I know all this?
Former Naval Officer, former Command Legal Officer, former Command Administrative and Personnel Officer.
Greenville N.C. Office:
Congressman Walter Jones
1105-C Corporate Drive
Greenville, NC 27858-4211
Phone: 252-931-1003 or toll-free (in N.C. only) 800-351-1697
Washington, DC Office:
Congressman Walter Jones
2333 Rayburn House Office Building
Washington DC 20515
Phone: 202 225-3415
Fax: 202 225-3286
He does have a way with the military here
pre-deployment exercises? They are next to impossible to get out of (for good reason), and (I say this with the utmost respect and delicacy) she will likely have to die before the USMC lets him out of a deployment.
The camp Leheune chaplain's office number is 910-451-5633, and it's staffed from 0730 to 1630 Monday-Friday. The info is available at http://www.lejeune.usmc.mil/mcb/chaplain/index.html, via the "emergency information" link at the bottom of the left-hand column. It's a downloadable .doc file for no apparent reason.
If they can't provide any help in a timely manner, I'd suggest going to groups like the VFW and American Legion. They will know where to find a sympathetic reporter, and believe me, nothing gets results lie high-profile public embarrassment.
I really don’t, Ali, but reading thru the thread, it looks like many other FReepers are being of great help.
I hope your post is ignored and that the matter is handled properly and responsibly within the rules.
Red Cross just called. They cant’ go know farther than processing and verifying. Clintons office for Military ( Voice Mail ) Schumer office (No answer at all)
Please read my post #43 - I am giving you solid advice.