I for one wish he would take MORE Hawaiian vacations.
Posted on 04/01/2013 9:09:23 AM PDT by dirtboy
During the ongoing sesquestration, taxpayers were confronted with the cancellation of White House tours, military cutbacks and the heartbreak of congressional staffers having to brown-bag lunches twice a week – while President Obama resumed golfing and his daughters went to the Bahamas and an Idaho Ski area in the same week.
Confronted with plummeting poll numbers in response to such, President Obama today unveiled proposals to significantly reduce the vacation travel costs for him and his family.
“In hindsight, it does use up Secret Service time and fuel for me to travel to go golfing” President Obama said.
"So I have hereby signed an executive order converting the Ellipse into a nine-hole golf course that will be merged into the White House grounds. This will reduce my golf travel time to a few minutes in a golf cart and will make security for such easier on my Secret Service detail. Notice I am only asking for a nine-hole course to save the taxpayers money.”
“In addition, my family and I have faced harsh criticism for vacations to Hawaii and the Bahamas. So I am ordering the Reflecting Pool and the Constitution Gardens Pond to be converted into a private tropical-themed water park for the use of the president and his family. Now I can go body surfing without some fool pool photographer taking a picture of me enjoying myself.”
When asked about the fate of memorials on that section of the Mall – the new WW II Memorial and the 56 Signers of the Declaration of Independence Memorial, Obama responded “We’ll just relocate the WWII Memorial to some red state where they like the military, and no one gives a damn about some dead crackers who signed a piece of paper over two centuries ago, so I'll just put a plaque up on the side of the new water park.”
And then he unveiled his final proposal. “I have ordered plans for a facility similar to Ski Dubai to be built just south of the Ellipse. The Washington Monument will be integrated into the facility and the top of the ski lifts will be anchored to it. Now my wife won't have to fly all the way to Aspen to ski.”
After the hubbub in the press room diminished, Obama closed by saying “Heck, the damn town is already named after Washington. Why does he need a stinkin’ monument all to himself? “
When asked about the cost to build the three facilities, Obama shrugged. “You racist right-wingers are just never happy with what I do. Here I am reducing my travel costs, giving up my presidential perogative to travel wherever and whenever I damn well please, and you whine about construction costs instead. It never ends.”
"I’ll just call up Bernanke and tell him to turn up the presses a bit. It’s worked for the last four years, it’ll work for the next four.” Think of the jobs all this construction will bring. "
Obama then abruptly ended the press conference to make his afternoon tee time.
Obamanation Counterculture File.
Why does this come out on April 1?
That “db News international” seems to be a new startup....
Today is April Fool’s Day. Is this news for real?
The “All this for a damn flag” comment was NOT on an April 1.
The only trouble with any sarcasm these days is the fact that we’re being “led” by such a collection of goons that it is no longer easy to discern what is real and what is not.
Gads, I hope I can bring my camera to the audience section of the “cleanse progressive” guillotine sessions when the libs get their just due after CW-II.
when you read this and have to actually wonder if it is a April 01 spoof you know 0dumbo is a caricature and a fool
good one!
Satire for sure. I’m certain logistics for April vacations are in being made ready to be at the POTUS’s and FLOTUS’s disposal.
The most telling “tell” is, since when would bo EVER be “stung” by just criticism?
...plus the “db” source, and more.
Gads, I hope I can bring my camera to the audience section of the “cleanse progressive” guillotine sessions when the libs get their just due after CW-II.
CW II will resemble the French Revolution in that regard.
Well done.
Joke, right?
I for one wish he would take MORE Hawaiian vacations.
Happy April Fools day, All...
But why stop there? Since the Mall is mostly used on weekends by the spoiled commie brats from Georgetown for pick-up soccer and softball, Obama can convert part of the Mall, from the end of the Reflecting Pool towards the Washington Monument, into a Jack Nicklaus designed 18 Hole Championship course.
As an added bonus, Obama can turn the Lincoln Memorial into the clubhouse.
April Fools’ Day!
If you don’t know its a joke, put on your James Carville paper bag right now!
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