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Run, Hillary, run!
WorldNetDaily.com ^ | January 6, 2003 | Doug Powers

Posted on 01/06/2003 9:11:42 PM PST by punster

Run, Hillary, run!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Posted: January 6, 2003 1:00 a.m. Eastern

© 2003 WorldNetDaily.com

If Hillary Clinton decides to seek her party's nomination to run for president, like it or not, she will be the nominee. People often run in fear and loathing at the mere mention of the name of the woman whose personality warms and comforts them like a handful of refrigerated ball bearings down their pants, but let's face it: If you're a Republican, this is great news. The nomination of Hillary Clinton would be the best thing the Democrats have done for this country since recommending the sterilization of Billy Carter.

In the 2002 elections, many Democrats had Republican itching powder put in their political jock strap. They were livid, and as soon as they finished scratching, they were seeking a warm spritz, a positive spin on the whole election debacle – and vengeance.

The beauty of Democrat politicians is in the fact that they never realize, or at least admit, why they lost. A good Republican can get whipped in an election and honestly say to himself, "How was I supposed to know she wasn't 18 and her father was the chief of police?" With Democrats, it's different. When they lose, the blame lies outside themselves. It most certainly can't be due to crooked dealings, antiquated and discredited ideals, or claiming to champion minority causes while a "First Place – Potato Sack Race" trophy from the Ku Klux Klan's father-son picnic sits on a shelf in their office. The usual conclusion is that they weren't adequately separated from their opponent, which will require a step (or 20) to the left. Enter Hillary Clinton.

In one aspect, Hillary is your average Democrat. She claims to represent the "common people," the downtrodden and the losers in the lottery of life. Many politicians hang 10 on that "serf" board, until waves of logic crash upon them, wiping them out. In the case of Hillary and her licentious, zipper-eroded husband, if they wanted to represent the downtrodden, poor and penniless bottom-enders, why the need to move out of Arkansas?

Illogic aside, it's in the interest of the Republicans right now to make Hillary look as good as possible. She's the leading candidate for her party's nomination, and they must see to it that her momentum carries through to the convention. If you're one who cringes at the hideous "nails on chalkboard" shrieky condescension of Queen Carpetbagger, suck it up and sing her praises. Hillary must be the nominee to ensure a Republican victory.

Stop bellyaching about the fact that she made an illegal fortune insider trading cattle futures. Just view it as a case of, as they say, "bovine intervention." Forget that she and Vince Foster carried the attorney-client privilege to the point of backseat tickle-fights and clasp fumbling, and he was later found dead while Hillary and her accomplices rifled his office so severely that investigators falsely assumed that Guns N' Roses had spent the night there. Whitewater? Hey, shafting people in land deals is the American way, buddy, and so is stealing silverware.

She has a number of other positives. From the looks of things, she regularly beat her husband, who was partially shielded from any direct blows by all the monkeys on his back. Hillary also played a pivotal role in making her brother Hugh, the perpetually scheming gravy boat with a law degree, pay back $400,000 in fees for presidential pardon work. Hugh later apologized to her for getting caught.

With a little help from her enemies, Hillary will be the Democrats' candidate. The nominee won't be Daschle. They know that a guy who cries because Rush Limbaugh consistently beats him like a Bangkok circus elephant gives the appearance of running, not confronting on an ideological level. John Kerry will miss the convention because he'll be at the hair stylist. Joe Lieberman will fall victim to the "Muppet Factor," meaning that it's virtually impossible to become president if you look like something that crawled out from under Fraggle Rock. Others are engaged in a futile "exploratory process," which, fittingly, sounds like a procedure involving your colon. Sorry, fellas, but 2004 is Hillary's year – until Election Day.

By the time the morning after the election rolls around, we'll have seen candidate Hillary Clinton go down to defeat in resounding fashion. The Democrats, reeling from another beating which will have rendered them the Jerry Quarry of political parties, will falsely assume they need to move further to the left, and dig themselves deeper into political oblivion. When your opponents want to dig their own grave, help them find a shovel.

That shovel looks a lot like Hillary Rodham Clinton.

Doug Powers is a freelance writer whose work has been read by millions of Internet denizens.


TOPICS: Activism/Chapters; Crime/Corruption; Editorial; Miscellaneous; Political Humor/Cartoons; Politics/Elections; US: New York
KEYWORDS: democrat; democratparty; demwits; elections; hellarewe; hillary; hillaryclinton; hitlery; humor; presidency; pureevil
Do we really want to take a chance on Hellarewe, aka Hitlery running?
1 posted on 01/06/2003 9:11:42 PM PST by punster
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To: punster
the woman whose personality warms and comforts them like a handful of refrigerated ball bearings down their pants

OMG . . . that is EXACTLY the way she makes me feel. YEE!
2 posted on 01/06/2003 9:12:57 PM PST by Xenalyte
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To: punster
"Don't cry for me, Argentina."
3 posted on 01/06/2003 9:14:46 PM PST by Ciexyz
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To: punster
She is as good as her word...

There is a big Rat line-up at their favorite KFC.

She'll do anything to get elected...

My thoughts exactly.

With BillyBlob off bonking Demi, HRC will be free of a big dead weight. Scary!

She'll pony up with her kissing cousin...

While the true believers in American Freedom have the last laugh.

Let's hope so, anyway.

4 posted on 01/06/2003 9:18:42 PM PST by jws3sticks
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To: punster
HILARIOUS!!
5 posted on 01/06/2003 9:19:32 PM PST by friendly
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To: punster
Do we really want to take a chance on Hellarewe, aka Hitlery running?

No. I'll never understand it. Right now, Hillary is not running and says she won't. She can't possibly be elected. Republicans here and throughout the nation, however, WANT her to run. If she's the nominee, instead of being one of 250 million who can't be elected, she is one of two people who can be elected. She would be one Bush mistake or one media conspiracy away from the White House. Somebody please explain why it is worth the risk to encourage a Hillary candidacy.

6 posted on 01/06/2003 9:22:30 PM PST by Types_with_Fist
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To: punster
I believe that She-Who-Wants-To-Be-Obeyed will run in '04. And I believe it will be a good thing, seeing as how she singlehandedly did more to bring about the '94 House takeover (that was precious, b/c the House is where the $pending starts) than any two Republicans. Run Hillary, run.
7 posted on 01/06/2003 9:23:30 PM PST by 185JHP
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To: punster

8 posted on 01/06/2003 9:26:47 PM PST by martin_fierro
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To: Types_with_Fist
A friend just sent me this in an email. May be old news but still good reading.

You really should be sitting down when you read this one.
  Gold Star Mothers is an organization made up of women whose sons
were
killed  in military combat  during service in the United States
armed forces.
  Recently a delegation of New York State Gold Star Mothers made a
trip
to  Washington, DC, to  discuss various concerns with their elected
representatives.
According to published reports, there was only one politician who
refused to meet with these ladies.
 Can you guess which politician that might be?
Was it New York Senator Charles Schumer? Nope, he met with them.
Try again.  Do you know anyone serving in the Senate who has never
showed anything
but  contempt for our military?
Do you happen to know the name of any politician in Washington who's
husband once wrote of  his loathing for the military? Now you're
getting warm! You got it!
None other than the Queen herself, Hillary Rotten Clinton. She refused
  repeated requests to  meet with the Gold Star Mothers.
Now, please don't tell me you're surprised. This woman wants to be
  president of the United States --- and there is a huge percentage
of voters who are eager to
help her achieve that goal.
May you sleep in peace always...and please...hug or thank a Veteran
for  that  privilege.

Think about this one !!!
Don't forget, our girl, Hillary Rodham Clinton, as a New York Senator,
now  comes under this  fancy congressional Retirement and
Staffing Plan.
  It's common knowledge that, in order for her to establish NYS
residency,
they purchased a  million+ dollar house in upscale Chappaqua, NY.
Makes sense.
Now, they are entitled to Secret Service protection for life.
Still  makes  sense.
Here is where it becomes interesting. The mortgage
payments hover at about $10,000 per month.
BUT, an extra residency had to be built within the acreage in
order to
house  the Secret Service
agents. The Clinton's now charge the Secret Service $10,000 monthly
rent
for the  use of said Secret  Service residence and that rent is
just about
   equal to their mortgage  payment,  meaning that we, the
tax payers, are paying the Clinton's mortgage, their transportation,
their
safety and security, their 12-man staff, and it's all perfectly
legal.


God Bless America



9 posted on 01/06/2003 9:30:26 PM PST by fabriclady
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To: punster
Hey, I'd be willing to do a crossover vote in the primary to insure Hillary is the demoncrap's nominee.

And then, proudly cast my vote for George Bush in the general election.

10 posted on 01/06/2003 9:33:35 PM PST by Slyfox
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To: fabriclady
Damn...
11 posted on 01/06/2003 9:34:20 PM PST by lmr
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To: Xenalyte
I hope someone has forwarded that editorial to hitlery. But I do hope they have found a way to send it anonomously, because I would not want their life to be in danger.
12 posted on 01/06/2003 9:38:29 PM PST by punster
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To: punster
Hmm, has a Firehat ring to it. Very good.
13 posted on 01/06/2003 9:42:54 PM PST by oyez
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To: oyez
I don't know. What if the war goes so well that it is forgotten by then. What if Hillary is nominated and a couple days before the election Bill and Chelsea are tragically killed in an accident? And the Soccer Moms pour into the polls in droves and . . .
14 posted on 01/06/2003 10:25:59 PM PST by garjog
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To: punster
What's the calculus of the limit of socialism as x tending toward zero?

Toward Communism.

"It Takes A Village"

15 posted on 01/06/2003 10:29:20 PM PST by onedoug
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To: fabriclady
The Gold Star mothers even admit this story is not quite true. They came to Hillary's office unnanounced and Hillary wasn't there.
http://www.goldstarmoms.com/

she's done enuff legitimate crappola, that made up stuff is not needed.

This article scares me, as we have a tendency to forget how she was able to become U.S. Senator from N.Y.

Everything fell into place for her and instead of running against Rudy, she runs against Rick.

2 things have to happen for Hillary to get elected, in 2004 (assuming she's the Rat nominee)
1. another attack under GW's watch
2. she legally "seperates" from Bill.

If she runs in 2004 and loses she's damaged goods for 2008.
To win in 2008 she needs to do 2 things:

1. legally be seperated from Bill, or having been legally seperated, now "working" on her marriage.
2. Have Colin Powell as a running mate.

Donning Flame proof suit....NOW!
16 posted on 01/06/2003 11:28:02 PM PST by stylin19a
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To: fabriclady
Regarding The Gold Star Mothers and The Hildabeaste: I have a profound dislike for The Hildabeaste and believe she represents true evil and is He11bent on destroying our precious country.

But... fair is fair. Much as I hate to admit it, the Gold Star Mother story has been thoroughly debunked.

17 posted on 01/06/2003 11:33:45 PM PST by upchuck
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To: punster
I just found this on the StrangeCosmos.com website. I had to post it!:



18 posted on 01/07/2003 3:49:34 AM PST by MeekOneGOP
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To: punster


19 posted on 01/07/2003 3:53:16 AM PST by MeekOneGOP
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To: All

Guaranteed to scare the HE** our of you !

20 posted on 01/07/2003 3:55:26 AM PST by MeekOneGOP
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To: All

Hillary addresses her fans with her mentor at her side

21 posted on 01/07/2003 3:58:42 AM PST by MeekOneGOP
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To: MeeknMing
She'll stay vocal but won't jump in until the others trip over themselves.

Like it or not, she's the most popular dem... 30% over Kerry's 19%.

I see a her being given the VP spot on the ticket with a wink and a nod.

22 posted on 01/07/2003 4:14:01 AM PST by johnny7
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To: stylin19a
Thanks for the update.
23 posted on 01/07/2003 4:58:27 AM PST by fabriclady
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To: johnny7
That is scary...
24 posted on 01/07/2003 5:01:38 AM PST by MeekOneGOP
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To: punster

The last thing Vince Foster saw before he was rolled up in a carpet.

25 posted on 01/07/2003 6:58:31 AM PST by Jashig
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To: punster
everyone should go the below website to show your support for the Hilda beast.

http://www.acsu.buffalo.edu/~kinho/youare.swf
26 posted on 01/07/2003 7:09:54 AM PST by vin-one
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To: vin-one
this thread needs a bump to the top..........
27 posted on 01/07/2003 8:22:24 AM PST by vin-one
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To: vin-one
Hitlery probably won't run in 2004, but if she did, it'd be fun to see her get whooped. Of course, she could win, but there's risk to all entertainment.
28 posted on 01/07/2003 10:33:33 AM PST by WrightOnTarget
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To: punster
(from Softwar)

Well what happened to AlGore after he made his secret trip to China - he dropped out of the race. Could it just be because the ChiCom money is behind Hillary, exclusively?

Oh no, there could not be any PRC campaign money floating around in the post campaign-finance-reform era of George W. Bush, could there?

29 posted on 01/07/2003 11:10:49 AM PST by flamefront (- beware Hillary)
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