USO Canteen FReeper Style ~ Thursday Sports Day ~ 19 June 2003

Links provided on thread | Mr.Tonkin, Ma, MoJo

[MoJo2001]

For the freedom you enjoyed yesterday... Thank the Veterans who served in The United States Armed Forces. Looking forward to tomorrow's freedom? Support The United States Armed Forces Today!

Sports Edition USO Canteen CEO: Tonkin Writer: MoJo Proofer: Ma LINKS Please click below   Sponsors Click below   Sports Photos! Just click on the picture and you'll be transported to see the full image. Thanks. Important Message: Stop Bandwidth Theft! If you want something, please right click and "save" or "save target as". Please don't steal graphics, music, images, or anything else on this page for use outside of Free Republic. You are more than welcome to have it for your personal use. Just save it! Thank you!!! Have a good one!

CANTEEN SPORTS CORNER Welcome to the Canteen Sports Corner. We have a new look this week. We will be changing it periodically as our mood changes. We hope you enjoy the new features that we've added. You can now visit all the sports links on the left hand side. It will allow you to make the USO Canteen Sports Corner  a one stop sports thread for you to enjoy. Also, you can keep up with our sponsors below the links on the left hand side. Don't forget that Ask Ma is at the bottom. In the coming weeks, we will be bringing you "guest" columnists with their sports take. Thanks for joining us today. It wouldn't be the same without you. SPORTS REVIEW   Upcoming events and updates in Sports: NFL Teams will begin welcoming players to mini camps and then to full squad camps. MLB is in full swing and will be preparing for the All Star game and break. The second season will begin the separation between pretenders and contenders. At the end of the month, tennis professionals from around the world will converge at Wimbledon. Will Serena Williams recover from her French Open loss to defend her title? THE NHL and NBA have both ended their seasons after crowning the New Jersey Devils (NHL) and the San Antonio Spurs (NBA) champions. Congratulations! NASCAR heads to Sonoma, CA for it's next Winston Cup race. Be sure to catch the race from Infineon Raceway. Michael Schumacher won the Canadian Grand Prix in a Formula One event. Schumacher drives for Team Ferrari and has been unbeatable for the past few years. Can Team Ferrari keep their dominance up? For only the second time in its history, the England Lions beat the New Zealand All Blacks in rugby. The Lions are headed to Australia to take on the Wallabies. The talk of the soccer world is whether or not David Beckham, Manchester United star, will be wearing a Barcelona uniform. With the election victory of Joan Laporta as club President, it seems almost inevitable now. Beckham has not been happy about being a pawn in the election. Congratulations to Jim Furyk for winning the US Open joining Canadian Mike Weir as the only other Majors winner this year. All of the information above was gathered from most of the sports links that are listed on this thread. Please feel free to peruse further for more information. Golf is the only sport played on the moon - on 6 February 1971 Alan Shepard hit a golf ball. The baseball home plate is 17 inches wide. Martina Hingis is the highest paid sportswomen. In 1898, one of the first programmers to be broadcasted on radio was a yacht race that took place in British waters. Roger Bannister: "The essence of sports is that while you're doing it, nothing else matters, but after you stop, there is a place, generally not very important, where you would put it." ASK MA Welcome to Ask Ma! This is where you can interact with Ma and ask her life's most important questions. This is especially true if you are an athlete, coach, or wannabe. If you happen to have a stressful life and need to tell someone, ask Ma! _____________________________________ Dear Ma, I love America, but I can't really speak English. I've dreamed of playing in the NBA, but I'm not sure if I'm good enough to make it.  Do you have any advice for a young French man with dreams of NBA glory? Thank you, Paranoid Parisian Dear Paranoid, It would seem that your biggest problem is your nationality. I would avoid telling anyone that you are French. If they ask, tell them you are Canadian. That's a universally understood nationality that anyone can use. They don't mind. I've already asked. Second, I would say that working hard and trying out for NBA scouts would be a must. Third, you need to have something more unique than the current roster of players. Speaking ghetto and acting ghetto won't cut it. Although, I must admit it, would be hilarious to hear a Frenchman speaking French ghetto. Work hard! Work hard! Work hard! After that, pray! Pray some more. If that doesn't help, have the French government campaign on your behalf that you are being singled out because you are French. While it may advance your chances at getting an NBA spot, you could be the next Charles Barkeley or Allen Iverson. Hey! We're Americans! We've got to have someone to hate. Don't forget to brush your teeth and take good care of your mama. ______________________________________ Dear Ma, I have always wanted to be a sportswriter for a major newspaper or magazine. Do you have any advice for me? Thank you, Jayson Blair's "voice" number 2. Hello Jayson Blair's "voice" number 2, How are you doing? How's the other 49 "voices"? Have you met our resident "nut" Burka Man? If not, I'll schedule an appointment for you to do lunch. As for your ambition to be a sportswriter, I would imagine that covering major news events was probably not a great thing. Doing sports can be a toughie as well. Most people will be able to watch the major sporting events. So? You can't fake it. You can fake it for your mama. You cannot fake it for the average Joe out there. They don't like to be fooled. Although, the more "sophisticated" snobs in Manhattan would probably be easy to fool. They don't really like American sports. They are more into "Whose Sleeping With Donald Trump" events. I'm sure it's stimulating, but not all around amusing for the rest of us. Also, you need to make sure that the rest of your "voices" are well medicated. We don't need "nuts" running your brain. You've got enough problems son. So? Take a vacation and get a new life. Maybe you can get into the FBI's Witness Protection Program and change your name. That would be the only way anyone would believe what you wrote. Have a great day Jayson's "voice" number 2. ---Ma

[MoJo2001]

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[MoJo2001]

CALLING ALL ATHLETES AND SPECTATORS!
IT'S SPORTS DAY AT THE CANTEEN!

[Aeronaut]

Good morning MoJo.

[MoJo2001]

Good morning, Mr.Aeronaut. Thank you to both you and Otto for the flyover. I hope all is well with you!

[MoJo2001]

GET OUTTA BED ALREADY!

[E.G.C.]

Sports Day Indeed.

It's nice and toasty here in Southwest Oklahoma and we're forcast to reach the 80s today.:-D

[tomkow6]

SALUTE!

 

 

[tomkow6]

Good morning, Sis! Good morning, Canteen Crew! Good morning, EVERYBODY!

GOOD

MORNING

TROOPS!!

[tomkow6]

 

Chicagoland Weather

Current Conditions:
As reported at KORD, O'Hare Arpt..
Last update Thu 19 Jun 2003 4:55 AM CDT.

	Mostly Cloudy
59°F	Feels Like: N/A°F
UV Index:	0 Minimal
Wind:	From the NNE at 16 mph
Humidity:	58 %
Visibility:	unlimited
Barometer:	29.96 inches and Rising

Today's Forecast
Thu 19 Jun 2003 03:02 AM CDT

 

THU

Mostly Sunny Low 47°F High 70°F

5 Day Forecast
Thu 19 Jun 2003 03:02 AM CDT

 

FRI		Sunny Low 51°F High 72°F
SAT		Mostly Sunny Low 58°F High 80°F
SUN		Mostly Cloudy Low 63°F High 78°F
MON		Scattered Thunderstorms Low 70°F High 79°F
TUE		Partly Cloudy Low 64°F High 82°F

[SouthernHawk]

Good Morning MoJo2001. Good morning to our military and good morning to the whole Canteen crew. Great thread (and I think that the Jayson Blair voice #2 has know the Burka man all his life).

Warm up exercise for today . . . . .

Two good ol' boys, Bubba and Junior get promoted from Privates to Sergeants.

Not long after, they're out for a walk and Bubba says, "Hey, Junior - there's the NCO Club. Let's you and me stop in and have us a drank."

"But we's privates," protests Junior.
"NO, we's sergeants now," says Bubba, pulling him inside
"Now, Junior, I'm gonna sit down and have me a drank."
"But, we's privates," says Junior.
"You blind, boy!" says Bubba, pointing at his stripes. "We's Sergeants now!"

So they order their drinks and pretty soon a hooker comes up to Bubba.
"You're cute," she says, "and I'd like to take you someplace and make you feel good -- but I've got a bad case of gonorrhea."

Bubba pulls his friend to the side and whispers, "Junior, go look in the dictionary and see what that gonorrhea means. If it's good, give me the okay sign."

Junior goes to look it up, comes back, and gives Bubba the big okay sign.
Three weeks later Bubba is laid up in the infirmary with a terrible case of gonorrhea.
"Junior," he says, "What you give me the okay for?!"

"Well Bubba, in the dictionary, it says gonorrhea only affects the privates."
Then he pointed to his stripes and says, "But we's Sergeants now!

[SouthernHawk]

know=known (need to wake up already)

[tomkow6]

Today's FEEBLE attempt at humor:

 

While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den.

"What is the big brass gong and hammer for?" one of his friends asked.

"That is the talking clock", the man replied.

"How's it work?" the friend asked.

"Watch", the man said then proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with the hammer.

Suddenly someone screamed from the other side of the wall "KNOCK IT OFF, YOU JERK! It's two AM!"

[SouthernHawk]

"Knock it off . . . . "

So that explains some of your "voices"! LOL

[beachn4fun]

GOOD MORNING ALL. GOOD MORNING TO ALL OF OUR AWESOME MILITARY.

I know today is Sports Day, and Mojo has done a great job of it, too, so I'd like to contribute the following for those of us who have been couch potatoes for some time, or who can't remember the last time they played a sport (was it croquet?), or who's idea of a sport activity is a day of working the remote, Oh, you get the idea. After a day at the Canteen's Sport Day, some of us will discover muscles we didn't even know we had. So, this is my gift to you:

I hope that I have enough for everybody. And, you don't have to Thank me now. It's the least I can do for my Canteen FRiends.

[beachn4fun]

Here's something that might help you out.....

[beachn4fun]

Nah, he doesn't have to explain his "voices" he's in a white jacket, remember? They never have to explain themselves.....

[68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub]

Click on the pic and I'll guide you
to the start of today's Sports Day thread




Please Thank someone in the military for ensuring our Freedom.
Take a moment and Thank a Service Man or Woman.
Just Click on the graphic to SEND an e-mail.

[SouthernHawk]

Thanks for the Coffee and Sports creme. One to get me going and the other to keep me going. What great folks hang out here in the Canteen.

(That's why I like coming here and "exercising my options"!)

Have a great day BeachN4Fun!

[SouthernHawk]

Good Morning Tonk.

Happy Saturday? to you bro.

[beachn4fun]

WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE SPORT?