Posted on 12/10/2005 7:44:29 AM PST by M203M4
Monday night, a record number of noise complaints were received by Residential Security Officers in Roger Revelle College. Officers responding to the calls found the sexual activity of a deaf couple to be the source of the noises, which were described as "cacophonous" by witnesses.
The first officer on the scene, Frank Zipelli, reported, "I could hear those two all the way from the parking lot." According to Zipelli, "It sounded as if they were bludgeoning a cow. There would be a low moan, like a ‘moo,’ and then a ‘bang’ and a higher-pitched ‘moo.’ It was like ‘MOO…BANG…MOOO!’"
Upon further investigation, officers on the scene were able to locate the disturbance in the bedroom of Revelle sophomore Katherine Chavez. "All her suite-mates were awake," said Zipelli. “They all were crowded around her door, afraid to go in.”
Jamie Valencia was one of those at the scene. "We banged on the door for 15 minutes straight!" said Valencia. "The sounds wouldn’t stop—they kept getting louder until the floor was shaking. I had a midterm in the morning and needed to sleep, so I called the police."
"We thought she had broken a leg or something," added Julie Klein. "The moans and thumping sounded like she kept hitting the wall, but her boyfriend was there too. I thought he might be beating her, but I was afraid to intervene."
Upon entering the room, the officials found John Miller and girlfriend Katherine Chavez, transfer students from the Sacramento Academy for the Deaf, interlocked in a "deafening tangle of sheets and frantically signing hands." After yelling a short while, RSO’s had to physically stop the couple from their activity.
Miller and Chavez transferred to UCSD in the fall in order to "more fully experience college life together," signed Miller. "The apartments seemed like the perfect environment to adjust to life with others."
What Miller and Chavez had not accounted for when moving to public school was their sound level when having intercourse. "We had attended an institute for the deaf," signed Chavez. "We didn’t have any idea that we were louder than anyone else. I just get so excited sometimes."
"This can’t go on every night," Zipelli told the couple. "I like eavesdropping on hot loud sex as much as any other RSO, but if these noise complaints keep coming in, I’m going to have to cite you."
Miller and Chavez were reportedly "deeply apologetic" about the incident. Miller offered, "I guess we could close the window next time."
Sounds like bull to me.
I've known deaf people and they are really, really, really loud. When they are angry they scream and sign pretty powerfully.
A friend of mind has deaf parents and he received proper sex education as a child from his parent's bedroom.
Reminds me of Porky's
If that's what you think....You are a severely demented human being.
PS... Prostitution is legal in Nevada. Perhaps you should go there. All the GIRLS like guys like you - with wallets.
check this guy out....
Enough to Make your skin crawl...
How old are you?
Screamingly hilarious article. Thanks!
If you look at the source listed at the bottom of the "hearing loss" website this is from, it takes you to this UC San Diego humor website. The website says right at the top "Still UCSD's only humor newspaper".
Don't shoot me, I'm only the messenger. But "MOO BANG MOO!" tonight anyways, alright!
(Bang)
*messenger is shot*
BOOOOO
:)
Gee. Freepers who can't
see a joke when it bites them . . .
Who would have thunk it?
OK Whatever
It was a lot of fun. I am still laughing even if the joke was on me!!!
Say that again.
This is the funniest thing I have read in a long time. Thanks for posting. ;)
Speaking as someone who goes to UCSD, if you check the link at the bottom of the page... references a site called the "mq". This stands for the "Muir Quarterly" which is a satire paper. So in case if you were wondering, this is likely made up.
I spewed at that one... thanks...
How many were under that bridge that night?
"How many were under that bridge that night"?
Deaf people can be very loud. I'm raising one. I hope I dont' get a call like this from her school in the next couple of years, though.
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