Posted on 07/18/2018 9:13:08 AM PDT by ProtectOurFreedom
Today’s dilemma, dear Readers, is whether to die laughing, or from the abject horror of these grammatic fauxs-pas:
A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.
A bar was walked into by the passive voice.
An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.
A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.
Hyperbole totally crashes into this insane bar and completely demolishes everything.
A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.
A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall, but hoping to nip it in the bud.
Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.
A synonym strolls into a tavern.
At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar — fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.
A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute sentence fragment.
A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.
An allusion walks into a bar, knowing alcohol is its Achilles heel.
The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.
A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned by a man with a glass eye named Ralph.
The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense. (Oldie but goodie)
(Excerpt) Read more at cdapress.com ...
Thanks for this.
Love it! (From a retired English teacher)
Things are fine. A few health issues but overcoming, it looks like.
Hah! Glad I’m not the only one who thinks that SJP is one of the homeliest women masquerading as a beauty in all of entertainment.
(you’ll understand the context if you watch all the way through to the end of the profane video)
There's a $500 fine for allitering...
Rule of 65: After 65, none of that matters.
I’ve been waiting for Norm Crosby to appear as a Celebrity Veteran.
IIRC, Norm once said he was hard of hearing after suffering a depth charge attack by the Japanese.
Ah, a list that only an English purist (i.e., a PITA), such as I, would enjoy. Thank you for this ... you can bet I’m going to have some of with it!
This doesn't parse easily. It's the comma following "laughing[,]" mixed with the unequal joining.
Yep. Same here. Growing older has its challenges.
Alliteration is not even a little funny.
YW. Glad you liked it. Not too many grammar comments, though.
Glad you liked it. Great grammar lessons there with a dose of good humor.
I couldn’t figure it out, either.
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