Skip to comments.DUmmie FUnnies 12-27-09 ("I cannot stay in my seat the final hour before a flight lands!")
Posted on 12/27/2009 7:18:56 PM PST by Charles Henrickson
Homeland Jan sez: "The system worked!"
So in the wake of the terrorists running amok again, there's talk of new rules requiring passengers to stay seated during the last hour of the flight. This could cause some problems, though, for passengers with . . . let's say, a certain pressing need to get up and go. Things are all wee-wee'd up! The ineptitude of Team Incompetent is affecting the incontinent! And the DUmmies are not pleased, as we see in this THREAD, "I cannot stay in my seat the final hour before a flight lands!"
So fasten your seat belt, stow your tray, and put your seat in an upright position, as we encounter some DUmmie turbulence, in Threat Level Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, wondering if he will have to lay off the ginger ale the next time he flies, is in the [brackets]:
I cannot stay in my seat the final hour before a flight lands!
[Yes we can!]
There is no way I can hold my bladder that long. . . .
[Hope and change!]
So what do they expect with this silly rule. Pee my pants?
[Listen, Hillary, Ol' Crusty has been through a lot. I'm sure she can handle that.]
I'll bet it enough people really did pee in their pants this rule would end damn quick. Perhaps an organized "Pee In" is in order here.
[Call the NAAPP.]
I am seriously thinking I need a note from my doctor.
[Six months, minimum, under Obamacare.]
I would also have a problem with the last hour and not being able to pee. Sometimes I have to go every 15 minutes. And being nervous doesn't help. Not to mention having IBS.
[Irritable Bolshevik Syndrome.]
I think maybe something more than a "pee in" is needed here. There should also be a "sh*t in." A whole planeload of people sitting in their own sh*ts smelling the place up.
All of the things this guy did could have been accomplished mid flight. Just because it happened shortly before landing isn't justification for changing onboard bathroom procedures.
[OK, no bathroom breaks AT ALL, the whole flight!]
Of course it does not stop the neo nazi thugs jumping on the bandwagon of racial profile all Muslims.
[Yeah, just a coincidence that 100% of these terrorist airplane guys are Muslims, I guess. We really need to be concerned about the radical Lutherans and their exploding lutefisk.]
Visualize swirled pees!
[You win the Nobel Piss Prize!]
I think this new rule is just for international flights . . .
[On Incontinental Airlines.]
I hope people on planes all sh*t their pants in unison. one two three CRAP. that might change things.
[Crap and Trade . . . Underwear.]
This has nothing to do with President Obama.
[Piss be upon him.]
we're dealing with a bureaucracy that thinks it has to do something after every incident, whether what they do makes any sense or not. The reality is that this man should never have been allowed to board a plane bound for the USA. . . . Barn door closing regulations that don't address that are the feeble hand-waving of some Peter Principled bureaucrat who can't think of anything else to do.
[We'd send you a Kewpie Doll, but new regulations prohibit the shipment of Kewpie-like materials.]
I do believe that Obama has a responsibility to start leaning on DHS to stop oppressing civilians who are just trying to get to Grandma's for the holidays.
[Throw Grandma under the bus and you don't have to worry about it.]
Frankly, President Obama has had a lot on his plate in 2009.
[Don't expect him to have time for national security.]
What's next? Will they make everyone fly naked?
[Be thankful the DUmmies don't fly much.]
As for us.give us the liberty to pee or we chose not to fly.
[DON'T TREAD ON PEE!]
I just hope they use warm KY Jelly on their latex gloves for those body cavity probes. . . .
[Calm down, benburch, calm down!]
what if people go through those body scanners and they've got a bit of constipation and the screen shows something strange in the lower abdominal area (an impacted stool). . . . Forced enemas?
[With wands like these, who needs enemas?]
If enough people leave behind a "puddle", the policy will change back very quickly. Think of it as a form of protest.
[All we are saying . . . is give pee a chance!]
Diapers. . . .
[benburch is in heaven!]
ever hear of depends undergarments...?
[Change we can relieve in.]
wear crappy, comfortable clothes and piss in their seat.
[OK, the DUmmies already DO this. So what NEW do you suggest?]
Whip it out and let it fly in the aisle.
[The system that works!]
That’s peein’ yer pants hilarious!
Seems like all the DUmmies have 9/10/2001 mentality.
It’s going to be a real hoot when the first Democrat Congressman is hauled out of a flight for not obeying this ludicrous rule.
#05 Top Primitive of 2009 now up.
The bottom five of the top ten were moved to the DUmping Ground, a sub-forum of the DUmpster, so as to make space for the top five of the top ten.
Link on next comment, below.
Bookmarking. This post is long, but promises to be entertaining. Thanks, franksolich!
Al Franken modeling the latest in travel attire!
The “hot stewardess” is gone from most airlines due to political correctness and feminism.
Everything else is changed due to rising fuel prices and taxes. Oil was damn near free for a long time so airlines could afford to fly empty planes.
Top Primitives of 2009 #5, #4, and #3 up now.
Link on next comment, below; link is to the forum page, but they’re all “stickied” to the top.
One of them is a particular favorite for many of us here.
Also, same link, a memorial thread for the one who gave the Bostonian Drunkard so much grief during Fitzmas (she went under “OldLeftyLawyer” at the time). She had recently been mausoleumed by my fellow alum Skins, and found us, and posted there.
A great lady, “Tangerine LaBamba,” once “OldLeftyLawyer,” and long ago re-baptized as Gloria Swanson by yours truly.
I don’t know which to do first! LOL!
He’s tired??? WE’re tired OF him! Poor baby! What a wuss!
It was funny in a sick, pathetic sort of way, though! :D
You know, I just realized...Janet Napolitano and Dick Durbin, separated at birth.
You win at internets.
Aw, the poor widdle baby!
“[With wands like these, who needs enemas?]”
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.