10. News: U.S. CDC says new flu hitting mostly younger people (Reuters)
Comic relief: You’re so old that even a novel virus doesn’t want you.
9. The elbow bump is back.
This is cooler than the terrorist fist bump, no?
Posted on 10/23/2009 5:49:32 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
Well, I for one, am just getting over the dreaded flu...and I couldn't tell ya if it was the seasonal or H1N1 (Swine) flu....it felt the same to me. My fever lasted for 2 and a half days and got as high as 103.8°. But I'm still alive.....and well, seeing all the chatter lately on Facebook, it seems I'm not the only one recovering from this.......flu, nor am I the only one questioning which one is it....
So....without further ado, todays SILLY THREAD..................
Top 10 reasons not to worry about the swine flu
10. News: U.S. CDC says new flu hitting mostly younger people (Reuters)
Comic relief: You’re so old that even a novel virus doesn’t want you.
9. The elbow bump is back.
This is cooler than the terrorist fist bump, no?
Photo source: Doctors learn elbow greeting to lower swine flu risk
8. The World Health Organization's (WHO) response to swine flu gives “businesses, governments and individuals practice for when a more fatal pathogen does threaten the globe.” SCENARIOS: What the new swine flu might do (Reuters)
7. H1N1 is nicknamed pig flu, not ‘pigs flew. When pigs do fly --and snowballs have a chance in hell – that’s when we’re really in trouble.
6. Don’t worry, just twitter now. (background music: Don't Worry, Be Happy) Twitter is great for watching uninformed panic unfold live.(XCCD.com
5. House (Hugh Laurie) is on the job…
4. Comedian Lee Camp says so …
Why NOT to Worry About Swine Flu
From Anthrax to Ebola, we've seen it before.
3. The swine flu is an economic stimulant, not limited to escalating sales in alcoholic beverages, pharmaceuticals, junk food, art supplies and surgical masks – with some consumers splurging in these industries simultaneously.
2. PETA was right after all….
And....the Number One reason not to worry about swine flu…
The world is going to end in 2012…enjoy life now.
Plus, swine flu masks are cheaper than a six-pack of beer....
In the meanwhile, here is something to take to help if you get it
The elbow bump is NOT safer if you follow our shallow government's advice to sneeze all over your arm instead of covering your mouth with your hand.
This will be the post of the day.
TLawsuit of the Day: Defective Underwear Causes Penis Pain
http://abovethelaw.com/2009/10/lawsuit_of_the_day_defective_u.php
Two old guys were chatting..... One said to the other: "My 85th birthday was yesterday. The wife gave me SUV". Other guy responded: "Wow, that's amazing! Imagine, an SUV! What a great gift!" First guy: "Yup.... Socks, Underwear and Viagra!"
Well that saved me a visit to the doc, thanks. I suspect we will see more of these sites with a .gov extension as healthcare is nationalized.
< /islamic rage boy >
Mmmmmm pi
KRAMER: I'm tellin ya the pigman is alive. The governments been experimenting with pigmen since the fifties.< /seinfeld >Jerry: Will you stop it. Just because a hospital gets a grant to study DNA doesn't mean they are creating a race of mutant pigmen.
KRAMER: Oh. Jerry wake up to reality. It's military thing. They're probably creating a whole army of pig warriors.
George: I wish there were pigmen. You get a few of these pigmen walking around I'm looking a whole lot better. Then if somebody wants to fix me up at least they could say, "Hey he's no pig-man!"
Jerry: Believe me, there'd be plenty of women going for the pig-men. No matter what the deformity you'll find some group of perverts attracted to it. "Oo that little tail turns me on."
ELAINE GROANS AND HEADS FOR THE DOOR.
TLawsuit of the Day: Defective Underwear Causes Penis Pain
Yeah, but that's an offsite, link.
I double dog dare ya to make an FR thread for it...
Somebody did post a thread about the defective drawers....
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2369374/posts
I did.
D.C. Police are “cracking” down on speeders.
For the first offense, they give you two Redskins tickets. (If you get stopped a second time, they give you two Nationals tickets.)”
Q. What do you call 47 millionaires sitting around a TV watching the Super Bowl?
A. The Washington Redskins.
Q. What do the Redskins and Billy Graham have in common?
A. They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell “Jesus Christ”.
Q. How do you keep the Redskins out of your yard?
A. Put up a goal post.
Q. Where do you go in D.C. in case of a tornado?
A. To FedEx Field — they never have a touchdown there!
Q. What do you call a Redskin with a Super Bowl ring?
A. Senior Citizen
Q. What’s the difference between the Redskins and a dollar bill?
A. You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
Q. How many Redskins does it take to win a Super Bowl?
A. We may never find out in the 21st century.
Q. What do the Redskins and opossums have in common?
A. Both play dead at home and get killed on the road.
A bald man with a wooden leg gets invited to a Halloween party. He doesn’t know what costume to
wear to hide his head and his leg so he writes to a costume company to explain
his problem.
A few days later he received a parcel with the following note:
Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a pirate’s outfit. The spotted handkerchief
will cover your bald head and, with your wooden leg, you will be just right as a pirate...
Very truly yours,
Acme Costume Co.
The man thinks this is terrible because they have emphasized his wooden leg and so he writes
a letter of complaint.
A week goes by and he receives another parcel and a note, which says
Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a monk’s costume. The long robe will cover
your wooden leg and, with your bald head, you will really look the part.
Very truly yours,
Acme Costume Co.
Now the man is really upset since they have gone from emphasizing his
wooden leg to emphasizing his bald head so again he writes the company another nasty
letter of complaint.
The next day he gets a small parcel and a note, which reads:
Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a bottle of molasses and a bag of crushed
nuts. Pour the molasses over your bald head, sprinkle on crushed nuts,
stick your wooden leg up your butt and go as a caramel apple.
Very truly yours,
Acme Costume Co.
I heard about that case from a friend of one of the lawyers. The best part was when the judge actually polled the men in the audience about underwear habits. The full transcript is hilarious.
The Washington Redskins had to cut practice short this past Wednesday. After a strange white substance was found on the field FBI officials were called in to investigate. Everything was back to normal after the officials told the organization that the white substance was the Goal line. Since that area of the field will not be entered at all the practice was able to continue.
I'm glad to hear you're on the mend! I had a flu like that last Feb, my 103.8 lasted for 5 days, mostly spiking in the afternoon/evening, but it wasn't H1N1 at that time. I'd not had a high fever like that in years. It can be draining - have lots of tea and soup (home made if you can get it), and yogurt is a good antiviral food.
And, lol, a cute pic!
OH, ROFL!! That is TOO funny! (forwarding to my Disney-fan friend...)
Worried about H1N1? Just dance!
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