Skip to comments.Sluggish Economy Blamed on Lazy Americans
Posted on 11/18/2011 9:23:31 PM PST by John Semmens
In his continuing quest to find the real killers of Americas prosperity, President Obama is now testing out the idea that laziness lies at the root of the prolonged recession were in.
Look, we in government have been going all out trying to get the economy moving, the president told an audience of campaign supporters. In the last two years the federal government has spent more than it ever has before. Weve generously handed out money left and right. Weve added new guidelines and procedures to virtually every segment of industry in an effort to direct businesses toward a more fruitful utilization of the nations resources. I mean, its been a tireless effort on our part to get things moving.
In contrast, what has the private sector done? Obama asked. Consumers wont spend. Businesses wont invest. This is despite a massive increase in the money supply from the Fed that has made borrowing very inexpensive. The private sector is just not doing its part.
Pure laziness is about the best face I can put on the private sectors failure to cooperate, the president speculated. People apparently just dont care enough about what Im trying to do for this country to put forth the effort I need to make the recovery work.
The president indicated that some of my advisors are urging me to take sterner measures. They say that the problem lies in relying upon voluntary compliance with the governments incentives and encouragement. They counsel more direct instructions, narrower tolerances for deviations, and stiffer penalties for disobedience. I hope it wont have to come to that, but I can wait too much longer for results.
In related news, former President Bill Clintons new bookBack to Work: Why We Need Smart Government for a Strong Economycalled for higher taxes and spending to reviveAmericas faltering economy. The idea that we can sit back and wait for the economy to get back to work on its own makes no sense,Clintonwrote. Its time that the president tells Americans to get their lazy butts off the couch and mow the lawn or therell be no allowance this week. Unless government takes firmer control over everyones purse strings I dont see how we can hope to get the country on the right track.
Or an inept president.
Good satire but the cause of our failing economy is a serious subject. You can’t build a growing economy by outsourcing your production.
Kick out the illegals who are doing jobs Americans WILL DO and u will find legal Americans are not lazy at all.
Thanks for the ping. Good to see your still at it.
Negrodamus is NOT inept... he is doing it on purpose..
ONLY republicans can give him the benefit of the doubt..
“Top down, bottom up, inside out...”
Orwellian isn’t it??
Iz that a pik-i-nik basket?
Good to see you posting again, John.
75 rounds of golf will only stimulate the economy so much.
Once again your satire is so perilously close to reality it is hard to read without throwing up. But I guess that’s what makes it cutting edge.
Now THAT is funny.
Hmmmmm. That's real close to the line between reality and satire. Mebbe over.
Good job, John, keep 'em coming!
Great to see you posting again. I hope this thread is not closed, as some of your other recent threads have been. You have many fans on FR.
Well, at least he’s stopped blaming evil ATM machines.
Good to see ya back on FR friend! Don’t let the stards get ya down.
Its time that the president tells Americans to get their lazy butts off the couch and mow the lawn or therell be no allowance this week.
The allowance is what it keeping them on the couch...It is all they know about earning a living.
Excellent article, John. I LOVE when you post!
Bump to that!
I'd say more but I'm too lazy! Bwahahahahaha!
Next step will be for the pResident to declare that to combat widespread laziness, the federal government will begin a program of amphetamine distribution, to raise the "national energy level". Speed will be be available at government approved centers for anyone who feels their personal economy could use a "boost".
It's a great deal -- and the first bag is free.
Glad to see you’re still at it.....!
If I recall, didn’t Carter say something like this?
Thank you for not giving up.
If the fifty percent of Americans who are productive would work twice as hard, the other unproductive fifty percent could live twice as good.
Brilliant, just brilliant. Humor is the only thing that will get us thru the next year.
Always look forward to your threads.
Bravo! Well done!
Thanks John. Good to see another edition of Semi-News/Semi-Satire from AzConservative!
One of the Left’s major weapons used prolifically against us is cynical humor, condescension, as well mockery.
It is well known that humor is, and the Left proves it all too often a weapon in the ideological wars between the Left, and the Right.
Your talent IMO in the field of mockery, of satire be it humorous, or of serious, and penetrating purpose are needed more today than ever before John. We (Mrs. RQSR, and myself) applaud your efforts, and hope to see many more such excellent pieces penned at your hand in the future.
Thanks for the ping, and please keep up the excellent work.
LOL very good one
I second Chad’s remark, why the mods or powers that be all of a sudden your stuff wasn’t good is beyond me.
Keep ‘em coming.
34 is for you John, silly me.
Great contribution, as usual.
Here is a real-life article that repeats the preposterous MSM argument (from Pelosi etc.) that government spending "drives the economy." The name of the article is Deep Spending Cuts Pose A New Threat To US Economy Unemployment benefits provide about $300 a week. Most of that money quickly and directly boosts consumer spending, which drives the economy.
Sickoflibs explained this argument's "justification:" The rich have money they don't need, so we will find a good use for it for it NOW!
The president indicated that some of my advisors are urging me to take sterner measures. They say that the problem lies in relying upon voluntary compliance with the governments incentives and encouragement. They counsel more direct instructions, narrower tolerances for deviations, and stiffer penalties for disobedience. I hope it wont have to come to that, but I can (Typo, should be "can't") wait too much longer for results.
Good writers like you make us mentally conjure up a believable Obama saying those words. Convincing and funny, but also
He’s looking for the culprit on the same golf course that OJ is looking for the killer.
Though, if ObamaCare is upheld the line about “voluntary compliance” is one which could well change into “the government will now mandate the purchase of [INSERT GOOD/SERVICE].”
Yes! The Steven Cobert Report and John Stewartstinklestein use it every night. Back-to-back, if I'm not mistaken. The Right has to do a better job of attacking the Left in humorous ways because for many, the 'funny bone' is connected to the 'cool bone', which is connected to the 'vote bone'. Ann Coulter and Dennis Miller come to mind. Sadly, it may never become mainstream due to a certain media 'bias'.
You could have Barney the purple liberal dinosaur taking candy from kids that have too much and give it to kids who already get free candy while the kids all kick his spongy dumbass for being stupid. And move up from there.
You could do a parody of the Jefferson's "Moving on Up" with a black family "Moving on Down", along with most of the middle class as a result of ObamaCare, deficits, unemployment, education inflation, etc. Dave Chapell comes to mind. Maybe an episode where the main character gets a job at a solar company- like Solyndra.
How about a Sleeping-baggers vs. the Tea Baggers? OWS never had it so bad.
The Democrats wrap their pseudo moral arguments with contrived economic arguments. Those economic arguments go ‘Handing out other’s peoples money stimulates jobs’ and ‘socialized medicine costs less than privatized medicine'.
But the (real) liberal moral argument is simple :”The rich have money that others need more than them”
We see what has played out since the advent of writing used to witness human development. We have the have and the have not. Over achievers, achievers, below achievers, none achievers. Simple description for what human history has never deviated from. Nothing in God’s creation really changes.
Semmens (semi-satirically) channels Obama channeling Chavez.
Great post - as always.
Thanks for the ping.
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