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Will you get these 20 jokes meant for really brainy people?
The Looking Spoon ^ | 3-12-14 | The Looking Spoon

Posted on 03/12/2014 9:46:13 AM PDT by The Looking Spoon

This has been making rounds. Some are really good, and the others I haven't gotten yet ;-P



TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: brainy; intellectual; jokes
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To: Zeneta

I had a good friend of mine who was a philosophy major, and a guy in his class who was a bit of a burnout (too much weed, acid or something) handed in a one page document for his project for the class, which was expected to be 5000 words or something like that.

On the single page, there was a single line that said “Because I am simply writing this one line, it proves that I understand the material.”

My friend said given the course (It was something like Existential Humanistic Psychology or something weird like that, I can’t remember) it was a brilliant response, and showed exactly that he understood.

The guy got an “F” and failed the course...


141 posted on 03/12/2014 1:03:52 PM PDT by rlmorel ("A nation, despicable by its weakness, forfeits even the privilege of being neutral." A. Hamilton)
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To: wideawake

Ah! Thank you...


142 posted on 03/12/2014 1:16:40 PM PDT by rlmorel ("A nation, despicable by its weakness, forfeits even the privilege of being neutral." A. Hamilton)
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To: Dr. Bogus Pachysandra

Roman numeral for 5 = V


143 posted on 03/12/2014 1:55:03 PM PDT by RikaStrom ("To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticize." ~Voltaire)
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To: The Looking Spoon

I didn’t get 3, 4 and 12.


144 posted on 03/12/2014 2:09:25 PM PDT by TigersEye (Stupid is a Progressive disease.)
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To: HamiltonJay

Good thing its Oct 31... ;-P


145 posted on 03/12/2014 2:37:45 PM PDT by MortMan (Is a delayed shower a "stay of exablution"?)
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To: HamiltonJay

Now I know this one, did I include this on my list of “do not understand”s?


146 posted on 03/12/2014 2:37:45 PM PDT by Shimmer1 (When you have neither the law nor the facts on your side, pound the table.)
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To: Ingtar

A software tester would pass the scenario based on the business requirement. Now a quality assurance professional would realize the business requirement was wrong and raise an issue.


147 posted on 03/12/2014 3:07:02 PM PDT by Woodman
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To: HamiltonJay
(3 x 8) + 2 = (2 x 10) + 5

(3 x 8) = 24
24 + 2 = 26

(2 x 10) = 20
20 + 5 = 25

Hate to break it to you, but your math is wrong.

148 posted on 03/12/2014 3:16:13 PM PDT by ShadowAce (Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
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To: The Looking Spoon

I took a philosophy class in high school and we were given an essay test with about 10 questions. Tuff test. One brainy guy finished the test, then wrote one sentence or one word answers to each of the questions - for fun (!!). The only one I can remember was:

“How does Kant’s Critique of Pure Reason fit into his philosophical system?”

Answer: “Nicely”


149 posted on 03/12/2014 3:27:49 PM PDT by hadit2here ("Most men would rather die than think. Many do." - Bertrand Russell)
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To: HamiltonJay

So Heisenberg was racing through town in his hot little BMW.

A cop pulls him over. “Sir,” he says, “do you have any idea how fast you were going?”

“No,” says Heisenberg, “but I know where I am”.


150 posted on 03/12/2014 3:32:20 PM PDT by JusPasenThru (Posting here = IRS audit.)
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To: Woodman

In my case, as a programmer (most of the time), I would ask what they meant and make them state it. Likely, the ones who write for me would never write that. However, the tester interpretation is always open for discussion.


151 posted on 03/12/2014 4:07:23 PM PDT by Ingtar (The NSA - "We're the only part of government who actually listens to the people.")
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To: The Looking Spoon; All

A gynecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and HMO paperwork, and was burned out. Hoping to try another career where his skillful hands would be beneficial, he decided to become a mechanic.

He went to the local technical college, signed up for evening classes, attended diligently, and learned all he could. When the time of the practical exam approached, the gynecologist prepared carefully for weeks and completed the exam with tremendous skill.

When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had
obtained a score of 150%. Fearing an error, he called the Instructor,
saying, “I don’t want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding
result, but I wonder if there is an error in the grade?”

The instructor said, “During the exam, you took the engine apart
perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark. You put the engine
back together again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark.”

After a pause, the instructor added, “I gave you an extra 50% because
you did it all through the muffler, which I’ve never seen done in my
entire career”.


152 posted on 03/12/2014 4:30:17 PM PDT by musicman (Until I see the REAL Long Form Vault BC, he's just "PRES__ENT" Obama = Without "ID")
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To: ShadowAce

It’s a typo. Oct 31 = 3*8 +1

I typed a 2 by mistake the math is correct


153 posted on 03/12/2014 5:36:18 PM PDT by HamiltonJay
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To: JusPasenThru

Nice


154 posted on 03/12/2014 5:36:52 PM PDT by HamiltonJay
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To: Loud Mime

The one about the programmer and loaves of bread was very good.

It was for me also. I worked with a programmer years ago who would have brought home the 12 loaves.


155 posted on 03/12/2014 7:05:40 PM PDT by Joan Kerrey (The larger the government, the smaller the people)
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To: Billthedrill

See and I thought entropy was an eye condition.


156 posted on 03/12/2014 7:12:37 PM PDT by JouleZ (You are the company you keep.)
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To: JusPasenThru
There are 10 types of people, those who understand binary, and those who don’t.

That reminded me of a joke ascribed to humorist Robert Benchley (famous during 20s-40s): There are two types of people in this world. Those who divide people into two types and those who don't.

I really enjoyed this thread and thankful to all who contributed but especially to those who explained the ones I did not get. As corny as some of them were, it was a laugh out loud experience.

157 posted on 03/12/2014 8:05:55 PM PDT by Robwin
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To: musicman
A gynecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and HMO paperwork, and was burned out. Hoping to try another career where his skillful hands would be beneficial, he decided to become a mechanic. He went to the local technical college, signed up for evening classes, attended diligently, and learned all he could. When the time of the practical exam approached, the gynecologist prepared carefully for weeks and completed the exam with tremendous skill. When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of 150%. Fearing an error, he called the Instructor, saying, “I don’t want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wonder if there is an error in the grade?” The instructor said, “During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark. You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark.” After a pause, the instructor added, “I gave you an extra 50% because you did it all through the muffler, which I’ve never seen done in my entire career”.

Can I borrow that one? I haven't laughed that hard in a long time, thanks!
158 posted on 03/12/2014 8:25:38 PM PDT by Oceander
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To: Oceander

Glad you liked it!! (Feel free to use it!!!)


159 posted on 03/12/2014 8:52:12 PM PDT by musicman (Until I see the REAL Long Form Vault BC, he's just "PRES__ENT" Obama = Without "ID")
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To: SoothingDave

13. I didnt at first either but I think it just means any person of the left who claims socialism or communism wasn’t “ done right.”


160 posted on 03/16/2014 3:52:43 PM PDT by crazycatlady
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