Terrible Flight Experiences (Vanity)

[Maximus of Texas]

On the flight home this morning, I was unfortunate enough to have a bleeder sit next to me. By bleeder, I mean he was invading my space because he was large and his body was spilling over into my seat. I've seen worse cases than what I had today but let's hear your experiences.

[Cagey]

Elaine: Oh, look at this... He's sleeping and I have to go to the bathroom. Maybe he'll wake up soon. What if my kidneys burst? Is it worth it not to wake this man up to damage a major organ? I hope this disgusting slob appreciates what I'm doing for him...

To passenger on the other side of her, but still to herself:
Yeah, make a little more noise with your gum-- that's helpful.

[Millee]

I was flying Chicago to Denver, where I had to sprint through O'Hare to catch my flight, (I was hung over & slept in so I didn't even shower) and by the time I made my flight I was sweating & had long island iced teas flowing out of every pore. I sat in my seat, contemplating using the "distress bag" when Mr. Hottie McHot sat next to me. He was very friendly and I was such wretched looking drunk! Longest most self-conscious flight ever!

[HoustonCurmudgeon]

1) Flying home in my Class A uniform in 1973 from Germany, a very large lady with two small children had two seats beside me, meaning one child had to be held the entire way. The stewardess ask if I would move to the only empty seat on the plane so the lady could have the extra one. I was only too happy to move and thanked the lady who asked me. Thirty minutes later as they started serving she dropped three lasagna meals into the still empty seat where I had been.

2) Coming out of Atlanta on Eastern, with my wife, in the late 70's the left engine blew up. A stewardess sat down in the empty seat next to me and started crying.

3) Landing at John Wayne in the 80's as we were about 200 feet off the runway the pilot gave it everything he had and we rattled for 3 minutes trying to gain altitude over the Pacific. A Cessna had crossed the runway in front of us.

4) Leaving Munich once they had the entire plane get off and unloaded our bags on the runway. We had to hand ID our bags then get back aboard. As we left about two hours late, three bags, half the cops in Germany, and a bunch of dogs were standing on the taxiway.

Other than that, no real problems .............. OH except when I was about 6 I threw up all over a Hughes Tool plane between Calgary and Houston.........

[Maximus of Texas]

You know, I fly a lot and I just realized that I never have any babes sitting next to me. Life ain't fair sometimes.

[BostonianRightist]

Here, here!

An hour and ten minute flight from Boston to DC is better than a 4.5 hour chinatown bus ride to New York, then another 4.5 hour chinatown bus ride from New York to DC.

[PaulaB]

It always happens that way..doesn't it???

[Maximus of Texas]

Remind me to never board a flight with you! :)

[Maximus of Texas]

Remind me to never board a flight with you! :)

[Cagey]

I was in the Army at the time and flying from Newark, NJ to Boston. At that time you could board an Eastern flight and just take any seat you wanted to. Of course like today you never knew who was going to sit next to you.

A fellow soldier had an ingenious idea on how to keep the seat next to him unoccupied. He'd take a string about 10 inches long and let the majority of it hang from the corner of his mouth. Unless the plane was full, it worked.

[najida]

Then you understand why I think RV's are the work of the devil ;)

I will fly anywhere before I'll ride there.

[Larry Lucido]

I sat in my seat, contemplating using the "distress bag" when Mr. Hottie McHot sat next to me.

Yea, I remember. :-)

[Millee]

No it ain't fair! We'll see if Mr. McHot is a freeper if he starts out, "On my way to Denver, I had to sit next to this unmade bed reeking of cheap booze..."

[PaulaB]

I guess the only time I have felt serious jet lag/sickness

was standing in customs in Tokyo

The Japanese are NOT in a hurry and

I had just come off a 13 hour flight from Dallas

I swear I almost lost it with every Japanese worker

in that airport I was so sick....

but didn't want to end up in a jail in Japan so

just stayed green and to myself

[Tatze]

Oh, you mean a fleshy flyer.

[Millee]

LOL!! I knew we'd cross paths again!

[Maximus of Texas]

That would work on Southwest! Great idea!!

[Larry Lucido]

So, I guess I look a little bit different sober, huh? ;-)

[HoustonCurmudgeon]

Remind me to never board a flight with you! :)

Heck I think I must be very lucky!!!

[DocRock]

I was leaving Sydney for LA and had about 10 minutes to make the gate. I had already entered the International terminal and had an exit stamp on my visa when I saw my plane rolling away from the gate. I was shocked that the plane was leaving early, but I noticed about 250 people heading my way from the gate. I checked the plane and it was missing an engine cover and I was standing near the only bar in the terminal, so I ran in and got a seat. Nobody was allowed to leave the International terminal as they had all officially "left" the country.

Five hours later, they had fixed the engine and we were on our way to New Zealand for a quick stop before heading to Honolulu next. They had some nasty cold chicken with what appeared to be a spoiled and deadly sauce which everyone decided to avoid for obvious reasons. We were told we would get a hot meal after we left Auckland, but the plane needed a little more service there, too. When we were in the air on our 13 hour leg to Hawaii, we were informed that the plane had been on the ground so long, that ALL food on board was quarantined for health reasons.

So, I was locked away from food for almost 24 hours with a bunch of starving drunks. I've never flown since that I didn't take my own survival pack.

[Millee]

I don't know. I try to never be sober! ;-)