Posted on 09/22/2006 1:00:00 AM PDT by sully777
LONDON (Reuters) - Stimulating a certain area of the brain can produce a creepy feeling that someone is watching you when no one is, scientists said Wednesday. Swiss researchers made the discovery while evaluating a young woman for surgery to treat epilepsy...When they electrically stimulated the left temporoparietal junction in her brain, which is linked to self-other distinction and self-processing, she thought someone was standing behind her. If they repeated the stimulus while she leaned forward and grabbed her knees she had an unpleasant sensation that the shadowy figure was embracing her..."Our findings may be a step toward understanding the mechanisms behind psychiatric manifestations such as paranoia, persecution and alien control," said Olaf Blanke, of the Ecole Polytechnique Federale de Lausanne, in the journal Nature...
___
You no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water
You can endure 110 degrees without fainting.
You eat hot chilies to cool your mouth off...
You can make instant sun tea...
You learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron...
The temperature drops below 95, you feel a bit chilly...
You discover that in July, it takes only 2 fingers to drive your car...
You discover that you can get a sunburn through your car window...
You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance... (Note from a Texan: "covered parking" is listed as a major benefit by many employers, apartment buildings, etc.)
Hot water now comes out of both taps...
It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is out on the streets...
You actually burn your hand opening the car door...
You break a sweat the instant you step outside... at 7:30 a.m. before work...
Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death"?...
You realize that asphalt has a liquid state...
No one would dream of putting vinyl upholstery in a car or not having air conditioning...
Shalom.
The irate ground controller (a woman) lashed out at the US Air crew, screaming and shouting on the ground control frequency. She ended her tirade with, "You can expect progressive taxi instructions in about a half hour, and I want you to go exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you. You got that, US Air?"
The humbled crew responded: "Yes Ma'am."
The frequency went terribly silent, and no one wanted to engage the irate ground controller in her current state. Finally, after what appeared to be an eternity, an unknown captain from another airline, came up on the frequency.
"Wasn't I married to you, once?" he asked.
Shalom.
I can relate to these... thank G-d it's officially fall!
of course, it's still in the mid 90's...
While browsing through some dust-covered archival material in the recesses of the Roman Section of the British Museum, a researcher recently came across a tattered bit of parchment. After some effort he translated it and found that it was a letter from a man called Plutonius with the title of "magister fastorium," or keeper of the calendar, to one Cassius. It was dated, strangely enough, 1 B.C., January 7 -- or 2000 years ago today (remember, there was no year zero). The text of the message follows:
Dear Cassius,
Are you still working on the Y zero K problem? This change from BC to AD is giving us a lot of headaches and we haven't much time left. I don't know how people will cope with working the wrong way around. Having been working happily downwards forever, now we have to start thinking upwards. You would think that someone would have thought of it earlier and not left it to us to sort it all out at this last minute.
I spoke to Caesar the other evening. He was livid that Julius hadn't done something about it when he was sorting out the calendar. He said he could see why Brutus turned nasty. We called in the consulting astrologers, but they simply said that continuing downwards using minus BC won't work. As usual, the consultants charged a fortune for doing nothing useful.
As for myself, I just can't see the sand in an hour glass flowing upwards. We have heard that there are three wise men in the East who have been working on the problem, but unfortunately they won't arrive until it's all over. Some say the world will cease to exist at the moment of transition. Anyway we are still continuing to work on this blasted Y zero K problem and I will send you a parchment if anything further develops.
Vale. Plutonius
Shalom.
Two wrongs do not make a right but two Wrights make an airplane
Selah
The boss approached the young man and said, "I've been listening in, and I must say I'm impressed with your ability. Where did you learn so much about talking to investors?"
"Yale," the young man answered.
Impressed, the boss said, "Oh, that's fine, just fine. And what's your name?"
"Yackson... Yames Yackson."
Shalom.
... her picture weighs 20 pounds.
... she uses a parachute for a shower cap.
... she has her own zip code.
... they call her an astronaut cuz she takes up space.
... her levi's arent 501's they are 747's.
... her measurements are 36-24-36 and her other arm is just as big.
... she wakes up in sections.
... she sat on a rainbow and made skittles.
... she got on a scale and it said one at a time please.
... if she wore a green and white sweater she'd look like a football field.
... her birthday fell off the calendar.
... that back in school she sat by everyone.
... she needs a belt to hold up her skin.
... she was wearing a malcolm X jacket and a helicopter landed on her back.
... she carries a telephone booth for a cellular phone.
... people jog around her for exercise.
... she carries a vcr as a pager.
... she eats Wheat Thicks.
... when she enters a room everyone yells, "Kool-Aid!"
Shalom.
Unghhhhhh!
ALMOST 5:00 - FREEDOM, HORRIBLE FREEDOM!
"Things don't look good. The only chance is a brain transplant. This is an experimental procedure. It might work, but the bad news is that brains are very expensive, and you will have to pay the costs yourselves."
"Well, how much does a brain cost?" asked the relatives. "For a male brain, $500,000. For a female brain, $200,000."
Some of the younger male relatives tried to look shocked, but all the men nodded in understanding, and a few actually smirked. Then the patient's daughter asked, "Why the difference in price between male brains and female brains?"
"A standard pricing practice," said the head of the team, "women's brains have to be marked down because they are used."
Shalom.
200?
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