Posted on 07/18/2011 5:53:46 AM PDT by Past Your Eyes
NASHVILLE INT’L AIRPORT — A Wyoming man walked through a TSA checkpoint with a raging erection on Tuesday, daring TSA officers and even fellow passengers to give him an invasive pat down.
“I’m next,” Warren Kelvin, 34, screamed as he pushed to the front of the security line. According to TSA officials, Kelvin had ingested two Viagra and wore sweatpants without boxers for his Southwest flight from Nashville to Phoenix.
(Excerpt) Read more at thewashingtonfancy.com ...
Harlequin Romance; Version “2011”
He grasped me firmly, but gently, just above my elbow, and guided me into a room, ‘his’ room. Then he quietly shut the door and we were alone. He approached me soundlessly, from behind, and spoke in a low, reassuring voice close to my ear,
“Just relax.”
Without warning, he reached down, and I felt his strong, calloused hands start at my ankles, gently probing, and moving upward along my calves, slowly but steadily.
My breath caught in my throat.
I knew I should be afraid, but somehow I didn’t care. His touch was so experienced, so sure.
When his hands moved up onto my thighs, I gave a slight shudder, and partly closed my eyes. My pulse was pounding. I felt his knowing fingers caress my abdomen, my ribcage. Then, as he cupped my firm, full breasts in his hands, I inhaled sharply.
Probing, searching, knowing what he wanted, he brought his hands to my shoulders, slid them down my tingling spine and into my panties.
Although I knew nothing about this man, I felt oddly trusting and expectant. This is a man, I thought, a man used to taking charge. A man not used to taking ‘No’ for an answer. A man who would tell me what he wanted.
A man who would look into my soul and say .. . .
“Okay,ma’am,you can board your flight now.”
Funny. I wish it was true. Along with the other articles “Pope Calls for Crusade After Accidentally Reading Speech from 1095 A.D.” and “Barney Frank Picked Last in Congressional Softball Game… Throws Massive Fit”
“Your leading misleading source for politics” LOL
“Even after we let him pass through he kept walking out of the terminal and getting back in line,” said Watershed. “Finally, Duncan had to bite the bullet for everyone and do a thorough screening of him in a private [security] room.”
Allbright, a 14-year veteran of airport security, announced his retirement shortly after Kelvin boarded the plane. “I’m going home to take a shower and make love to my wife,” said Allbright as he got into his car. “This job isn’t for me. I’ve suddenly lost my passion for touching strangers.”
The whole scenario falls apart as soon as you try to imagine “calloused hands” on a TSA agent.
Actually the story is not true. Once TSA saw Warren Kelvin and his problem they told him to “BEAT IT”! lol
He's already qualified to be the senator from Massachusetts
You owe me a keyboard. LOL
ROTFLMAOPMP ~
ROFLMAO!
Hey, those fly zippers are rough on your hands.
that was the best post of the day even though it was NOT true. And you just KNOW I will not be the only one to remark here. I knows dees people on FR. LOL
In the event of a TSA screening lasting for more than four hours, please consult your lawyer...
Good this guy is a hero. Let all of the gropers quit in disgust and maybe Big Sis will get a clue.
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