***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD***

[Lucky9teen]

Tips for Avoiding U.S. Drone Strikes

One sure fire way to avoid being targeted is to assume the low information voter position. This is a modified duck and cover pose, just stick your head between your legs and…well you know the drill. Otherwise, here are some other suggestions:

1. Join the church where Al Sharpton is a preacher. No one knows where it is.
2. If you can’t find it, join the church Obama frequents.
3. If you can’t find that: register as a Republican Senate candidate from New York, New Jersey, or California.
4. Get a federal “green energy” loan, then declare bankruptcy. The U.S. government will cover for you.
5. Proclaim you are a victim of black-on-black crime. The media will render you invisible.
6. Come out as a black conservative. The media will render you unrecognizable.
7. If you are a woman: confess that Bill Clinton or Ted Kennedy once propositioned you.
8. Hide in the back of a Massachusetts senator’s submerged car. It will buy you at least a few hours.
9. Become a member of Obama’s Job Council.
10. Insert yourself in the next 2,000-page bill.
11. Follow Jesse Jackson to an honest day’s work.
12. Get friendly with Sandra Fluke. Nobody has ever been able to find any of those guys.
13. Say “Hi, I’m Jon Huntsman and I’m still running for president.”
14. Pretend you’re a salad; at least the First Lady won’t spot you.
15. Never walk in New York holding a 16oz Styrofoam soda cup.
16. Never drink from a bottle of water in front of a camera. This will put you in the media spotlight 24/7 for days.
17. Get in line at the DMV or another government office; by the time you emerge, drones will be obsolete.
18. Impersonate an American taxpayer.
19. Hide in plain sight in Benghazi; it makes a lot of difference.
20. Camp out at Obama’s shooting range; no one is ever there.
21. Stay where Obama keeps his college transcripts, U.S. passport records, or financial records. You will never be disclosed.
22. Set up in one of Chicago’s highest murder-rate zones. A truckload of fighters with RPGs will go undetected.
23. Hold a sign, preferably bilingual, declaring a “Drone-Free Zone.”
24. Buy a Prius or Chevy Volt
25. Put a COEXIST bumper sticker on your car
26. Avoid racist code words like "budget" or "fiscal responsibility"........or "Lie"
27. Are you a Conservative Blogger? Maybe you shouldn't be....
28. If you are a world famous rapper or movie star, remember drone strikes never hit the Obama's campaign bus
29. Minorities....it's better to have a victim mentality, than to be a drone strike victim.
30. If you are Caucasian.....going tanning will ensure that Obama won't target you for drone attacks.
31. If all else fails....contribute to Obama's campaign.

[Lucky9teen]

[Lucky9teen]

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SPEAKING OF DRONES

DRONING ON TO


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[Disambiguator]

IBTROTTT (In Before The Rest Of The Top Ten)!

Good Morning!

[Lucky9teen]

We are living in upside down world

[Lucky9teen]

[verga]

Top ten

[Disambiguator]

Put a COEXIST bumper sticker on your car

[ShadowAce]

I’m here this morning!

[DooDahhhh]

Here, here

[JRios1968]

Top 20 fo’ sho

[RandallFlagg]

Top Twenty!!

[baddog 219]

[Drawsing]

Why did the stonecutter quit his job?

He felt like his boss was taking him for granite.

[TheOldLady]

Men are so misunderstood...

[Drawsing]

Why did the chicken cross the road halfway and then stop?

He wanted to lay it on the line.

[N. Theknow]

How can you tell if a baker is lucky?

He has a four loaf cleaver.

[Drawsing]

What do you put on a pig that has a wound?

Oink-ment.

[envisio]

That is awesome... searching the googglewebs now. Must have one of those.

My coworker has the coexist bumper sticker. ‘Someone’ put a stickynote on it that said “...with suicide bombers? I don’t think so.”

(he knew it was me and we are cool like that. Otherwise I would not touch a man’s car, moonbat or not.)

[Old Sarge]

Well, it has Friday in the title...

[N. Theknow]

I try to avoid funerals.

I'm not a mourning person.