Morford: Who The Hell Is "Undecided"?

San Francisco Chronicle ^ | Friday, September 10, 2004 | Mark Morford (I am becoming VERY concerned about her...)

[presidio9]

Polls are the genital warts of election year. They are the swarming gnats in your Jell-O salad, the dead escalator in your shopping mall, the sour milk in your coffee. Because clearly, if you attempt to follow any of them, the AP polls or the American Research Group polls or the Newsweek polls or the ABC News polls or the CBS News/NYT polls or the Zogby polls, you can only conclude one thing:

These polls are designed solely to mangle your head and confound your synapses and elate you and titillate you and then plunge you into instant despair and then yank you back out at the last second like some sort of "Fear Factor" death-plunge moronism.

I know I am not alone in this sentiment.

Take, for example, how nearly every single poll listed above indicated that, just after the Democratic convention, John Kerry could not lose. He had gained huge numbers on a miserable and baffled Bush and every poll had Kerry nailing Shrub by anywhere from two to six percentage points and he had momentum and a clear message and broad support and it all meant it was Kerry's election to lose and woo-hoo go team break out the champagne.

But wait, not so fast. Because then BushCo had his big, tearful, gay-hatin', war-lovin' GOP convention and whored the 9/11 theme so shamelessly you could veritably feel the World Trade Center victims cringing in their graves.

Now, of course, polls indicate that those pro-Kerry numbers are exactly reversed. Bush's numbers are suddenly up again and have barely broken through that magic 50% ceiling that held him in check this past year as the nation had seemed to be finally realizing what an unmitigated embarrassment he was, and suddenly Kerry is lagging behind by those same few points.

[dfwgator]

Perhaps Miss Morford would prefer to live somewhere we she doesn't have to deal with those annoying elections...say Cuba.

[Pondman88]

do not post this idiot.

[abc1]

I'm not undecided, this Mark Morford guy needs help.

What a tantrum.

[presidio9]

Perhaps Miss Morford would prefer to live somewhere we she doesn't have to deal with those annoying elections...say Cuba.

Good idea. Once there she will be free to associate with other prominent and highly credible "journalists."

[Extremely Extreme Extremist]

I totally agree. I used to laugh at his columns but he's becoming irritating, and he's reaching Ted Rall status.

Plus every one of his "columns" make subtle gay sexual references.

[RockinRight]

Weenie liberal homo...

[Brett66]

This should help missy Morford cope:

[lormand]

"Polls are the genital warts of election year."

I have to agree with this line.

As my tagline implies, I hate polls. Polls are turned into news items by lazy and incompetent news people who have no local or national content to investigate or report.

I wish the FreeRepublic community would seize posting articles about polls.

[akorahil]

Take, for example, how nearly every single poll listed above indicated that, just after the Democratic convention, John Kerry could not lose

Uh, The same 'nearly every single poll' that showed no bounce?

[presidio9]

I totally agree. I used to laugh at his columns but he's becoming irritating, and he's reaching Ted Rall status.

Posting Moroford is very important.

There are hundreds of other threads to read here. Nobody is holding a gun to your head.

PS- There is nothing "subtle" about most of her "gay referrences." She wallows in buttsex.

[Toonces T. Cat]

This guy always causes my FAG alarm to exceed its approved decibel limit...:-)

-Toonces

[crazyhorse691]

MARNING: AN ENVIRONMENTAL SUIT IS REQUIRED TO PROCEED INTO THE DEPTHS OF RATTHINK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[AngryJawa]

Wow! A new personal record...I couldn't read beyond the FIRST SENTENCE!

Polls are the genital warts of election year.

Are you kidding me?

[crazyhorse691]

Hey, that is suppozed to be a W not a M. It wasn't me. I knl hwo tp selpl

[beelzepug]

"...subtle gay sexual references."

SUBTLE???

[presidio9]

morford ping

[SAJ]

''Seize''?

As in, ''All your poll are belong to us''?

:^)