Your Favorite Johnny Carson Joke?

Free Republic Vanity Kind-of ^ | 01/23/2005 | gortklattu

[gortklattu]

Just the Jokes, OK?

Johnny: "Sis - Boom - Bah

ED: "Sim - boom - bah

Johnny: What sound does an exploding sheep make?

[Quix]

Right!

AND,

SUCH a !FUN! way to go!

Soooooooooooo worthy defending out the kazooooo!

[NeoCaveman]

"Sure. Move the cat".

We have a winner!

[My2Cents]

[nickcarraway]

He smoked to much, drank too much, but also married too much.

[doug from upland]

TRIBUTE SONG - yes, it has in it the line about kissing his balls.

[Snoopers-868th]

What is that suppose to mean?

[Quix]

He may have a different perspective of how good his life was from his current vantage point.

Eternity puts a lot of things in a different perspective.

[Phsstpok]

Numbers Guy;

"Sure. Move the cat".

NorCalRepub;

petting the pussy is my fav.........wasn't that Ann Margaret......

An American In Dairyland;

Zza Zza! I was just thinking about that one! LOL!

Petronski;

Best.

Line.

Ever.

Actually, it was supposedly said to Zza Zza, but as far as I can find out it never happened (or was cut and has never surfaced).

However, on the best of Carson videos (I'm watching as I type) Jane Fonda asks Johnny if the story is true and proceeds to tell the whole story.

[Texasforever]

Mine was when an earthquake happened during the show and Johnny looked into the camera and deadpanned..."The God is dead meeting has been canceled".

[Safrguns]

Wow!.... and I thought I was old.
How longs it been since he quit?

[kayak]

To me, the very funniest moment ever on tv was Ed Ames, as Mingo, demonstrating his tomahawk-throwing skills. It was Johnny's reaction that made an otherwise funny event absolutely hilarious.

[Prince Charles]

Rodney Dangerfield: "Johnny, how long have you and Ed McMahon been together?"

Johnny: "I guess it's been about ten years now."

Rodney Dangerfield: "Wow, that is a long time...any children?"

Johnny: "It's not that we haven't TRIED!!!"

[Safrguns]

Oh geez... just turned on the news... didn't know he just died

[oldenuff2no]

I liked the one where Racquel Welch got up and walked out on him. She brought her cat on stage with her, she sat down and put the cat in her lap. She asked Johnny if he would like to pet her pussy. Johnny said that her sure would if she would move the damn cat. Johnny got sued and Racquel never went back on his show again.
Someone else might have already posted this, I didn't read all of the other posts.

[veronica]

When Saturday Night Live hit the airwaves, and everyone was talking about Chevy Chase having a late night talk show that would compete with The Tonight Show, Carson said... "Chevy Chase couldn't ad lib a fart after a baked-bean dinner."

:)

[Squantos]

Yep...one night they were letting some bug crawl on his hand and the guest handler said that there were two breeds of the bug and the deadly one could fly and the harmless one couldn't......

At that point the bug flew up on Carsons forehead and the ca ca hit the fan as he scrambled....... I cried I laughed so hard at that panic....sort'a a sh*t'n go blind fear moment that is really funny if it wasn't me !

[Petronski]

It wasn't Zsa Zsa, it was [gasp] Jane Fonda.

She did not have a cat with her, but she alluded to that idea.


Yes, I have seen the clip. It happened.

[jimt]

I don't usually check snopes.com on stories my mother told me thirty years ago.

I guess I'll have to start !

[GSWarrior]

I thought the response was 'I bet that makes his putter flutter.'

[Phsstpok]

again, I just watched it. He didn't say it to Jane Fonda and she didn't have a cat with her. Jane Fonda said her son had told her the story and she asked if it were true. She told the whole story.

Johnny died.