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More women are asking for prenups
Sun Sentinel ^ | September 18, 2005 | Georgia East

Posted on 09/18/2005 3:05:48 AM PDT by Caipirabob

Over a casual dinner, Rachel Kaplan turned to her boyfriend and asked, "You're open for a prenup, right?"

Darren Waldohlz, 38, a partner in a successful speed-dating business, admits he was caught off guard. But he said he realized a prenuptial agreement would protect the house he owns, too.

"It's not that I plan to get divorced," says Kaplan, 23, a single mom from Fort Lauderdale, who has a sizable inheritance. "I have to protect myself and my daughter."

While men are still more likely to seek a prenup, "women are becoming a more dominant force," said attorney Alan Braverman, who has offices in Fort Lauderdale and Boynton Beach.

Experts attribute the change to women marrying later or more than once.

"It's not uncommon in today's world that women are entering marriages with assets and stock options," said matrimonial attorney Jacqueline Valdespino, in Coral Gables. "Now both sides have equal bargaining power."

(Excerpt) Read more at sun-sentinel.com ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Extended News
KEYWORDS: divorce; greed; marriage; matrimony; prenup; prenuptual
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To: Bon mots
" I want him to support me and my child until my inheritance comes in, but then he gets nothing when I make my escape."

Yup. Don't you just get that feeling.

21 posted on 09/18/2005 4:04:35 AM PDT by music is math
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To: R. Scott
" After marriage is when we really get to know the person. " .....

And even after years and decades of marriage, some still don't know the person they married.

There are people who are evil and devious to the core, but, are very good at hiding it from the rest of the world.
22 posted on 09/18/2005 4:05:44 AM PDT by Prophet in the wilderness (PSALM 53 : 1 The FOOL hath said in his heart , There is no GOD .)
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To: Caipirabob

Well, she does have a child from a prior relationship. She has an inheritance coming that needs to be sheltered for the child. It doesn't say in the article whether her bf has children from a prior marriage. If she should die, if I'm not mistaken, legally her husband would inherit all of her assets under common law. That means his children would also stand to inherit. Have you ever seen grown children fight over money? It isn't pretty.

As for first time married couples, pre-nups, set you up for failure. Jmo, however Tori Spelling has one, for obvious reasons. I'm sure when Paris and Paris tie the knot, they'll both have one. The rich are not like you and me.


23 posted on 09/18/2005 4:08:05 AM PDT by TheSpottedOwl ("President Bush, start building that wall"!)
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To: Junior
No fault divorce is what the real issue of prenups come from.
No fault divorce is what is have destroying the marriage, family, our communities, and our country.
A family is the backbone of society.
24 posted on 09/18/2005 4:09:04 AM PDT by Prophet in the wilderness (PSALM 53 : 1 The FOOL hath said in his heart , There is no GOD .)
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To: Caipirabob
The social perspective of divorce bears no more stigma than a trip to the ATM.

Yes, stigma having been stigmatized has had negative consequences. Approval and disapproval are what drives a culture "for better or worse."

If we recover our collective senses, getting married and staying married (even when the going gets tough) will be highly valued. Still, prenups are prudent to have, like wills and life insurance.

25 posted on 09/18/2005 4:14:59 AM PDT by NutCrackerBoy
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To: neb52
I wonder how it looked like before feminism really came to power and into play in our world and divorces.
If you really want to look at the reason why thing are today, just take a look at what the feminist have done to brainwash , warp, and pollute women's minds and how they managed to manipulate the court system to rule in their favor in the last 40 to 50 years.
26 posted on 09/18/2005 4:17:11 AM PDT by Prophet in the wilderness (PSALM 53 : 1 The FOOL hath said in his heart , There is no GOD .)
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To: music is math

Yup... and with no thanks to the feminsit, and TV shows like Oprah.


27 posted on 09/18/2005 4:18:58 AM PDT by Prophet in the wilderness (PSALM 53 : 1 The FOOL hath said in his heart , There is no GOD .)
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To: Prophet in the wilderness

Yep.


28 posted on 09/18/2005 4:25:55 AM PDT by R. Scott (Humanity i love you because when you're hard up you pawn your Intelligence to buy a drink.)
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To: TheSpottedOwl
Suppose it was the other way around ?
Like a flip flop, the man had a child from a prior relationship or marriage, and the man was about to get a inheritance that he wants to shelter his inheritance for his child from a conniving lying snake girlfriend ( who is good at hiding her true motives and character ) who wanted to marry him.
Would he be justified to protect himself and the child's inheritance and financial future from this woman ?
29 posted on 09/18/2005 4:26:26 AM PDT by Prophet in the wilderness (PSALM 53 : 1 The FOOL hath said in his heart , There is no GOD .)
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To: Prophet in the wilderness

"If you really want to look at the reason why things are today, just take a look at what the feminist have done to brainwash, warp, and pollute women's minds...."

Hold on a minute. As a female, I admit that Feminism has done alot of damage but it's also done some good. 40 or 50 years ago, a man could walk out on his wife for a younger woman (and it happened quite often), leaving the wife with absolutely nothing. There are instances like this in my family. The man left the woman (with kids) and carried on with his new girlfriend as if he didn't have a life before her. The wife had no choice but to go out and work, but back then, women weren't as educated as they are today, so the wife had to get a menial job and the pay was menial as well. Try raising children in a position like that.

Some of you Freeper men really confuse the hell out of me. First women are blood suckers and should be forced to sign a prenup if the man is wealthy. Then women are bitches if they dare to educate themselves, move up the corporate ladder but have a difficult time finding a male companion. So if you are looking to blame Feminism, then some of the blame falls squarely on your shoulders as well. Woman are damned if they do, and damned if they don't.

Sorry to rant, but geez.


30 posted on 09/18/2005 4:29:41 AM PDT by Arpege92 ("I am happy, be it yourselves." - Pope John Paul II)
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To: R. Scott
People do change, and during the courtship period most are putting on their best face. After marriage is when we really get to know the person.

Correct. Someone going into a marriage, may not see things which should raise red flags. Men as well as women can be gold diggers, never mind just plain nuts.

31 posted on 09/18/2005 4:30:49 AM PDT by TheSpottedOwl ("President Bush, start building that wall"!)
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To: TheSpottedOwl

Yep. But - love comes with a set of blinders.


32 posted on 09/18/2005 4:35:22 AM PDT by R. Scott (Humanity i love you because when you're hard up you pawn your Intelligence to buy a drink.)
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To: Caipirabob
My wife and I have a prenup.

One item, two words:

NO CATS

33 posted on 09/18/2005 4:38:15 AM PDT by Manic_Episode (Perhaps today)
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To: Caipirabob

-Darren Waldohlz, 38, a partner in a successful speed-dating business, admits he was caught off guard.-

Guess he jumped in too fast?


34 posted on 09/18/2005 4:42:18 AM PDT by AmericanChef
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To: Arpege92
The man left the woman (with kids) and carried on with his new girlfriend as if he didn't have a life before her.

The ability to treat deadbeat husbands, especially dads, as criminals is a great reason for the state to enforce the terms of marriage. This is just nuts and bolts of civilized life, or should be, if we weren't so fixated, collectively, on individual gratification rather than individual responsibility, to the extent that we don't even know what marriage is for.

Feminism defined as more women having career available to them is fine, but not when it takes away the option of devoting themselves to child-rearing. A woman should not have to stay in the workforce as a protection against the husband abandoning his responsibilities - society and the law should provide the protection.

35 posted on 09/18/2005 4:52:01 AM PDT by NutCrackerBoy
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To: Prophet in the wilderness

An even better question is why someone want to marry a lying, conniving snake, in the first place?

Just because there is a pre-nup, does not preclude the spouse from contributing money to the marriage. If the amount of money is sizable, then the principle is held in trust, and one can live off the interest.

Inheritances are exempt from the mutual assests considered in a divorce action. Well, they used to be. We don't know how the document was written up. It could have been worded to avoid a fight between the children in case of death. Wills can be successfully challenged. Just look at the mess Anna Nicole Smith went through.

Always remember that the love of money is the root of all evil.


36 posted on 09/18/2005 4:58:22 AM PDT by TheSpottedOwl ("President Bush, start building that wall"!)
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To: spetznaz
My only question is how to breach the subject of a prenup to your SigOther without having a plate of fettucine alfredo smeared on your face? Or, even worse (far worse), heart-wrenching sobs accompanied by 'why don't you trust me!'

Start asking her for money... Before long, if she doesn't dump you, she'll demand one!

Mark

37 posted on 09/18/2005 5:02:26 AM PDT by MarkL (I didn't get to where I am today by worrying about what I'd feel like tomorrow!)
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To: Caipirabob
Only those who make a fuss out of prenups before the marriage are the ones who have a ulterior motive in the whole thing , and has something to hid, because, if they didn't , they would have no problem with prenups.

That " Don't' you trust me " line is a poor excuse, and lame line to make the other party feel guilty for wanting to protect themselves and their property or wealth that was built up before they even meet.

It is the same deceitful heart condition, and motive as the same line in the Samson and Delilah story from Delilah.

The Philistines wanted to know were Samson got his strength so they can defeat Samson, so ? they conveniently sent beautiful Delilah his way because they knew Samson was weak when it came to beautiful women.

After many times trying to find out Samson's strength, Delilah got frustrated, and said to Samson ,

that, " if you TRULY LOVE ME, you would tell me were you get your strength from "

Knowing in her heart that he would want to please her, and not make her feel hurt, ( in truth, Delilah couldn't care less about Samson personally .

When ever their other person says " don't you trust me " or " don't you love me " red flags should go up in warning.

If they ( the other person ) leave or split after mentioning a prenup before getting married, then, they were the wrong one, and only wanted something else ( for selfish reasons ) out of the marriage than true love and commitment.

The party ( person ) who is wanting a prenup is basically saying,
( I am entering this marriage in good faith, wanting to make a commitment, and to love, )
However ? if by your part ( the other person ) is dishonest, deceitful, does not want to make a true commitment and for what ever reason this marriage fails ( and fails, not by my part, but, by your part )

then ?

I am taking necessary steps to protect myself, my family, and my financial future if ( you , on ( YOUR PART ) fail to live up to your commitment, or faith, or love in this marriage ).

Buy no means does a prenup necessarily mean that if you are the one who wants a prenup, that you are saying this marriage is going to fail.

You are putting the burden of the level of honesty, the level of commitment or the other person to live up their wedding vows on them to live up to, because you know in your hear that you want to make the marriage work.
38 posted on 09/18/2005 5:03:47 AM PDT by Prophet in the wilderness (PSALM 53 : 1 The FOOL hath said in his heart , There is no GOD .)
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To: R. Scott

Blinders and a temporary lobotomy, lol!

The ones you have to watch out for, are the ones who have a problem. They are one person during the courting process, then they get the ring on your finger, and you see the real person. If you're young, it's difficult to spot them in time.


39 posted on 09/18/2005 5:10:18 AM PDT by TheSpottedOwl ("President Bush, start building that wall"!)
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To: Caipirabob

"I'm not being dour, just practical."

Quite right. People grounded in morality KNOW they are going for the long haul because if they don't they are not who and what they believe themselves to be.

Looking at it from another angle: Those guys who go over the top into the teeth of machine gun fire do so not because they WANT to but because they recognize a Truth greater than their own lives.


40 posted on 09/18/2005 5:28:45 AM PDT by TalBlack
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