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[VANITY] The Thread Of Hijacked Threads
N/A | 10 May 2006 | kevkrom

Posted on 05/09/2006 9:52:39 AM PDT by kevkrom

Single-issue people.

They're out there... on every thread. No matter what the topic, they try to link it to their pet issue in some way, shape, or form.

They are... The Thread Hijackers™.

While little can be done to stop them, and it is probably best to ignore them, I find it much, much more fun to mock them. Sure, being passionate about an issue you care about is a good thing, but thread hijacking is annoying and, to be honest, turns off people who might otherwise agree with you.

So, on to the mocking.

I'd like to coin the term "H-score" to indicate the number of posts on a thread before someone tries to hijack it with the issue du jour. For example, if the attempt occurs on response #5, the thread has an "H-score" of 5.

What I propose is that when hijacking offenses occur, that they be documented here in the following form:

Thread: Thread title and link
H-Score: Post # on thread containing the offense (first per thread only)
Offender: Screen name of offending poster
Severity: Scale of 1 (low) to 5 (high) on how off-topic the comment is
My Comments: Optional, use to justify severity or just general mockery of offender

Perioidcally, I will go through the nominees and post finalists (for subjective awards) and winners (for non-subjective awards) in the following categories (subject to change at any time):

The issue du jour changes over time. At one time, it was Terri Schiavo. As of the time of this posting, it is illegal immigration. Note that ridicule on this thread is not to be taken as argument over any poster's position, but rather their methods and bloody single-mindedness.

So, for now, nominations will be taken for threads hijacked by "illegal immigration/border control" single-issue folks. Watch this space for any changes.


TOPICS: Editorial; Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: 6000yearsold; abortion; allyourbase; amiloggedin; arkancide; aybabtu; beeber; billclinton; bushbashers; bushbots; bushisneverright; bushisneverwrong; cheese; civilwar; coulter; crevo; daylightsavingstime; election2000; eliangonzales; helenthomas; hijackedthread; hillary; homosexuals; illegalimmigration; impeachment; kerry; libertarian; looser; loserdopian; malkin; monica; moose; mse; muslimmale18to40; noone; nothingtoseehere; openborders; plimpton; purplehearts; recipe; series; sister; someonesetusthebomb; stuned; swiftboats; terrischiavo; trialrun; waronsomedrugs; wod
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301 posted on 05/09/2006 1:36:47 PM PDT by evets (beer)
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To: No Blue States

That usually keeps a couple together
but maybe they were from Europe...
I hear the wool from Europe is to die for


302 posted on 05/09/2006 1:40:24 PM PDT by firewalk
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To: Xenalyte; Redcloak; Hap

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm, beer butt chicken. Haven't done that in a while.


303 posted on 05/09/2006 1:41:10 PM PDT by Bacon Man (Tivo has spoiled me. Now I want the ability to pause life.)
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To: OSHA
The Most Pointless Post in the History of the Blogosphere!
304 posted on 05/09/2006 1:41:49 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (Rachel Corrie's not dead - she's taking a CAT nap.)
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To: Bacon Man; Redcloak; Hap

Yeah, because it takes about three days to cook! ;)

Seriesly, we should do that. Maybe this weekend or next.


305 posted on 05/09/2006 1:50:09 PM PDT by Xenalyte (Pudding won't fill the emptiness inside me . . . but it'll help.)
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To: Warren_Piece
Didn't someone once post a vanity about his fingers being smelly? That, by far, was the funniest thing I've ever seen on FR.

Yes, I had forgotten about that one. Definitely one of the all time funny threads. I'm cracking up just thinking about it.

Another good thread was the "Am I Logged In" thread from a couple of years back, I think.
306 posted on 05/09/2006 1:50:35 PM PDT by Texas2step (<><)
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To: Xenalyte

I once stuffed thin slices of sausage under the chicken's skin. It looked like a cross between Michael Jackson and the San Diego Chicken, but it sure was tasty!


307 posted on 05/09/2006 2:01:31 PM PDT by Redcloak (Messing up perfectly good threads since 1998.)
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To: Texas2step
Don't click this if you're on dial-up.
308 posted on 05/09/2006 2:12:05 PM PDT by Redcloak (Messing up perfectly good threads since 1998.)
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To: Redcloak
Block the neck opening with a potato.

and stand back while it explodes...
309 posted on 05/09/2006 2:15:38 PM PDT by firewalk
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To: Xenalyte
Hey anything worth doing is worth doing right.

I have been feeling the need to cook with fire lately. Next weekend would probably be better. Haps getting her knee worked on this Friday ya know.

310 posted on 05/09/2006 2:20:01 PM PDT by Bacon Man (Tivo has spoiled me. Now I want the ability to pause life.)
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To: kevkrom

STANDARD DISCLAIMER:

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311 posted on 05/09/2006 2:24:13 PM PDT by BulletBobCo
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To: tumblindice
>What's that, Lassie? You say aliens from another planet have Timmie tied-up in a cabin and are-----probing him? And the script calls for bank robbers, not aliens?

Look, Dice, you're a nice guy, see, but I've had it up to my eyeballs with that little brat Timmy. I'm a freakin' DOG, fer cryin' out loud.

Can't a collie roll in a cow pie in peace, instead of having to pull some stupid kid's peanuts out of the latest fire he's gotten his dumb butt into???

312 posted on 05/09/2006 2:24:36 PM PDT by Darnright (You knew the job was dangerous when you took it, Fred.)
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To: kevkrom

BRAVO! :-)


313 posted on 05/09/2006 2:28:00 PM PDT by nopardons
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To: Redcloak
Lol! Reminds me of the "Testing- Do not Respond" threads!
314 posted on 05/09/2006 2:50:01 PM PDT by MaryFromMichigan
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To: BulletBobCo

My brain just imploded.


315 posted on 05/09/2006 2:55:51 PM PDT by Chena (I'm not young enough to know everything.)
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To: martin_fierro

You can hijack me as long as you feed me 7 layer magic bars.


316 posted on 05/09/2006 3:02:48 PM PDT by MissAmericanPie
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To: Slings and Arrows

Reminds me of the great button that did nothing...back in the days where some bored girl posted daily pics of her nipple...


317 posted on 05/09/2006 3:06:32 PM PDT by Knitting A Conundrum (Act Justly, Love Mercy, and Walk Humbly With God Micah 6:8)
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To: TXBubba

Don't have a chance to read it all now. One of the hijack topics that comes up often is abortion. It never fails. Some child or pet or adult has something horrible happen to them and someone will say "what about the 40 million babies that have been butchered." I'm anti abortion but it's ridiculous how much abortion gets brought into threads not talking about it. I guess the other one already mentioned is illegals.


318 posted on 05/09/2006 3:50:22 PM PDT by beaversmom
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To: hispanarepublicana

Just coming back from work and seeing this, hr. Without hijacking threads, we would have no threads at all. We are by nature parasites, attaching ourselves to a host. Or is a parasite a resident of Paris? It's all so confusing.


319 posted on 05/09/2006 4:07:27 PM PDT by speedy
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To: BulletBobCo

You forgot my favorite:

"DO NOT TAUNT HAPPY FUN BALL."


320 posted on 05/09/2006 4:09:45 PM PDT by BeHoldAPaleHorse ( ~()):~)>)
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