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New Harry Potter book destroys precious rainforest(Borowitz becomes enviornmental)
http://www.jewishworldreview.com ^
| Andy Borowitz
Posted on 07/19/2005 7:51:41 AM PDT by manny613
The latest installment in the best-selling Harry Potter series, "Harry Potter and the Half-blood Prince," has destroyed one of the most precious rainforests in the world, all of whose trees were felled to create the paper for the 652-page book.
(Excerpt) Read more at jewishworldreview.com ...
TOPICS: News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: getaclue; humor; satire
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1
posted on
07/19/2005 7:51:42 AM PDT
by
manny613
To: manny613
Those books are made from recycled paper from all of al franken hillary clintons and bill clintons unsold books
2
posted on
07/19/2005 7:55:03 AM PDT
by
al baby
(Father of the Beeber)
To: manny613
Did he write the same thing about the Clinton memoirs?
3
posted on
07/19/2005 7:56:03 AM PDT
by
Mrs. Shawnlaw
(Rock beats scissors. Don't run with rocks. NRA)
To: manny613
While bemoaning the destruction of the Dihing-Patkai rainforest, Ms. Spivak said that the Sierra Club was "pulling out all the stops" to keep similar ecological atrocities from occurring in the future: "We are doing everything in our power to keep Bill Clinton from writing another book." LOL! Too bad this is satire, and not the truth!
4
posted on
07/19/2005 7:56:06 AM PDT
by
knittnmom
To: manny613
Besides, the rain forests are more useful for hardwood to be used in furniture. They make lousy pulp. Softwood trees like pines from the American continent are much better for paper.
5
posted on
07/19/2005 7:57:55 AM PDT
by
ElkGroveDan
(I'm sick and tired of being sicked and tired!)
To: 80 Square Miles
Notice how they sneak a 'global warming' in there.
PPPPPFFFFT. Nothing but a hoax. In the 70s, it was 'global cooling'. Now it's the opposite. What's next, 'global snowing?'
6
posted on
07/19/2005 7:58:35 AM PDT
by
Ultra Sonic 007
(Brave! Skilled! Total Idiot!)
To: manny613
Made a lot of people's money disappear from their wallets as well...
7
posted on
07/19/2005 7:58:56 AM PDT
by
joesnuffy
To: Ultra Sonic 007
Those in the eco-pomp industry have snow jobs.
8
posted on
07/19/2005 8:00:35 AM PDT
by
weegee
(Re: immigration "Those Syrians are coming to Iraq to do the bombings that Iraqis won't do.")
Comment #9 Removed by Moderator
To: joesnuffy
10
posted on
07/19/2005 8:01:01 AM PDT
by
weegee
(Re: immigration "Those Syrians are coming to Iraq to do the bombings that Iraqis won't do.")
To: manny613
I realize this is satire, but FWIW at the end of the book, the "about the author" section clearly states that the paper in the book contains "no fiber from ancient forests". Also as noted, the silviculture plantings of yellow pine and other pulpwood around the US are far better for paper manufacturing than some gigantic hardwood from south america (now, those redwoods and sequoias, on the other hand...jk)
11
posted on
07/19/2005 8:01:03 AM PDT
by
Little Pig
(Is it time for "Cowboys and Muslims" yet?)
To: Ultra Sonic 007
12
posted on
07/19/2005 8:02:19 AM PDT
by
Frank_Discussion
(May the wings of Liberty never lose a feather!)
To: manny613
Whew! Good thing trees grow back! Plant some walker poplars, those suckers are ready to harvest in 10 years.
To: Frank_Discussion
Global liberalization.
Heil Kennedy! /sarc
14
posted on
07/19/2005 8:07:59 AM PDT
by
Ultra Sonic 007
(Brave! Skilled! Total Idiot!)
To: al baby
Good one.
To: manny613
(SPOILER) For all you Harry Potter fans, I just want to say this: Dumbledore is the one who dies, he is killed by Professor Snape.
No, I dont know why. I didn't read the book , and I dont intent to dont have the time or the inclination. It was fun posting this info, however
Yes, I am a rotten guy, thank you very much.
16
posted on
07/19/2005 8:11:10 AM PDT
by
70times7
(An open mind is a cesspool of thought)
To: 70times7
17
posted on
07/19/2005 8:13:23 AM PDT
by
wideawake
(God bless our brave troops and their Commander in Chief)
To: ElkGroveDan
Pulp
18
posted on
07/19/2005 8:15:07 AM PDT
by
al baby
(Father of the Beeber)
To: 80 Square Miles
LOL! Too bad this is satire, and not the truth! "Tell that to the Lesser Beautiful Nuthatch."
Love it!
To: al baby
Some trees are only good enough to be turned into toilet tissue...
20
posted on
07/19/2005 8:16:20 AM PDT
by
70times7
(An open mind is a cesspool of thought)
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