Posted on 12/02/2009 10:59:32 AM PST by CarmichaelPatriot
Anybody else here have to annual goals identification and assesment as part of their annual review?
I was looking at what they want me to enter. The categories are Quality, Growth (company), Profitability (company), and Human Capital/Development. I am a software developer. I write what they tell me to write, so I don't see where I have anything to contribute here, except to the Quality item. The company won't pay for training, so the Human Capital/Development issue is completely out of my hands. The "free" training that is offered is either BS "touchy / feely" crap I don't want or need, or technical in nature at a level I could've used about 30 yrs ago.
I work for a medium size company (6000 employees or so) that primarily provides staffing and technical solutions to federal, state and local government agencies, so the way I see it, company growth is all based on what bids we win or lose and I have nothing to do with the bidding process (and I don't want to). Profitability is driven by requirements, project management and business process improvement. I've done quite a lot of BPI in the past, but management doesn't seem too interested in it and I received almost no recognition for it. Now recently our CEO has come out with a letter to all employees that we will be experiencing "Flat Salary Growth" this year (ie. no raises, you suckers) and he hopes they'll be able to fund the bonus pool this year (didn't happen last year or the year before).
Any thoughts? I wonder if anyone other than my direct manager (who is a joke) even looks at this stuff. I'm thinking of being really sarcastic in my entries, just for the heck of it.
“My work ethic is exceeded only by my passion for quality.”
Well you know that my favorite is when we take our ethics quiz. It is a 20 question test that had one question that says...
True or False: It is OK to grab a female employees breasts if they are particularly bodacious.
Then the remaining 19 questions are on being accurate on your time charging.
Then they ask you to turn in your time card on Thursday which has you guessing how many hours you will work that day and Friday which clearly violates the ethics training you have just took.
Given our building, that is a purely hypothetical question.
Purely. There's a reason we don't have a "Girls of Our Company" calender.
Strangely enough though I always get that question wrong.
Once upon a time (10 years ago) the Dilbert site had a
program that would generate a performance review for you.
It was pretty good too. Looked like any other if you
put in some key words.
They also had a “Mission Statement” generator.
I think both are long gone.
Unfortunately we have a third party company that does the software for our performance goals and talent management. Its pretty stupid - the only thing is that it levels the playing field. Those who are underachievers have nothing to put in the blocks and those of us who can read and write make up inane goals, measurements, and objectives. We then can make all those things look great because we just go blah, blah, blah. I always make wordy paragraphs using words I know my management doesn’t know (I even spell using the UK English dictionary just to hassle them). The actual performance rating part of it has canned answers for below, met, and above - you just pick a level and it fills in the performance rating and justification.
Its not much and while I hope the company did not spend to much on it - I suspect they did. At least it keeps someone employed.
As a very seasoned, partly-retired, former executive, I find this current trend absurd in all regards.
A manager of staff, at any level, should be giving constant feedback, instruction and guidance throughout the year, day in and day out. The only “annual” review for any employee should be able to be summed up in two words: Good Job!
If any employee doesn’t qualify for “good job” at any time during the year they need: More training, more supervision, or to be let go.
The rest is all nonsense IMHO
Dang.. You guys are no fun...
I guess I’ll take it (semi) seriously.
Thanks...
“Dang.. You guys are no fun...I guess I’ll take it (semi) seriously.”
that’s the spirit...
Dude, I sympathize, it is painful. But you’ve got to learn to play the game saying (writing) a lot by saying nothing. The idiots above will eat it up.
Done the same things in various combinations over the years in the military, corporate and academic arenas. It is indeed a game adhering to the flavor of the year. In terms of quality just remember “The race for Quality has no finish line so technically it’s more like a death march”.
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