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WASHINGTON — After weeks of unsuccessfully stoking Trump supporters towards violent action, the FBI has changed course, beginning internal discussions for executing a MAGA-style attack using FBI resources. "We are already at Defense Readiness Condition 3 – this means that if the extreme MAGA wing doesn't act, we will bypass the plainclothes agent phase to DefCon 1, bringing out our biggest weapon: Ray Epps." FBI Director Christopher Wray addressed a round table of defense ministers, eliciting scattered gasps when he invoked Ray Epps, the famous FBI asset with expertise in starting insurrections. The attempts to get "MAGA Republicans" to commit...

VIDEOWe need to see MORE of the Jen Psaki doppelgänger!

Raqqa, Syria Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris. "This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no...

"Tiger Woods, other big-time golfers and corporate sponsorships should demand it. In the current climate, with all the sweeping changes, it’s only right and just. Best of all, in this case, it’s a simple and smooth fix. The Masters never felt good or even sounded good when you said it. And before we hear from the choir about tradition and history, save it. When that history and tradition is rooted in slavery, it shouldn’t be preserved and honored. Augusta National was built on grounds that were once a slave plantation and was the property of a slave owner."

"Democrats Announce SUCCESS at Removing Trump from Office!" The Democrats have come to a deal to announce the removal of Donald Trump from the presidency of the United States to the cacophony of cheers. With the deal, Donald Trump will leave office on January 20, 2025, more than eight years after the Democrats started impeachment hearings. "WE DID IT!" Ebullient House Minority Leader Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez gleefully ejaculated to the press. "The specter of nationalist, capitalist White Supremacy will finally lose their single biggest supporter in the history of the country. This is a great day for all Americans, particularly the...

I think Trump has done a splendid job so far as president of the United States. However, I heard just today that there is a possibility that there might be some collusion (col-u-son) between Trump and the Russians. Apparently the Russians wanted Donald Trump to be president just as much as we did and so they did some collusion type things to make sure that Trump won the election. I'm not quite sure what kind of things they were but it could be that Russians were sent over here during the election to dance outside of Trump tower and hold...

L.A. street artists hit Governor Jerry “Moonbeam” Brown a day before the election. The photos show a cross-eyed Brown as if looking up from a toilet bowl filled with bullet trains. The artists have hit targets in Michigan, New Hampshire, and around Maxine Waters’s neighborhood this past week. They promise more “shenanigans” in the weeks to come. If you are interested in supporting their work, please earmark it in the donate button up top. We’ll get it to them.

By Patrick "Facts need testimony to be remembered and trustworthy witnesses to be established in order to find a secure dwelling place in the domain of human affairs. From this, it follows that no factual statement can ever be beyond doubt—as secure and shielded against attack as, for instance, the statement that two and two make four. It is this fragility that makes deception so very easy up to a point, and so tempting. It never comes into a conflict with reason, because things could indeed have been as the liar maintains they were. Lies are often much more plausible,...

<p>The New Yorker's Washington correspondent has been denied a press place on Barack Obama's tour of the Middle East and Europe after the magazine depicted the presidential candidate as a terrorist on its cover.</p> <p>The Obama camp said there was not enough room on the aircraft but the move is being seen as a snub to the magazine.</p>

Twenty-eight-year-old California native Adam Yahiye Gadahn (aka Azzam the American) recently appeared on an al-Qaida video with al-Qaida’s number two man, Ayman al-Zawahiri. In the video Gadahn, looking like a bearded Pillsbury Doughboy in his white robe and turban, challenged American soldiers to convert to Islam.

Cave drawings thought to 25,000 years old have been discovered in a grotto in western France. Several of the drawings—one showing an apparently turban-wearing human figure eating a wild pig—are deemed to be offensive to Islam. Coming on top of the cartoons of Mohammed published in Denmark and reprinted in several other European countries, Muslim anger has continued to swell. “These infidels cannot continue to mock us without consequence,” said Hezbollah chief Hassan Nasrallah. “The West should be prepared for the real holocaust. When Iran has the bomb there will be no mercy for these blasphemers.” In an effort to...

WASHINGTON - John Kerry (news - web sites)'s wife sang about how happy she is that he wasn't elected. Karl Rove revealed his successful strategy for winning President Bush (news - web sites) a second term. Wannabe presidential candidates pressed for advantage in the 2008 race. It was as close to "Saturday Night Live" as Washington gets, as journalists assumed the personas of politicians in song, dance and wisecracks at the Gridiron Club's 120th annual dinner. It's a journalistic tradition in which, for one night, members of the Fourth Estate turn the tables on the powerful people they report and...

CBS Anchorman, Dan Rather has exposed papers showing Reform Party candidate Ralph Nader was paid for a nude photo spread on this weeks segment of 60 minutes.

Father Joe The Man Who Saved My Soul By Tony Hendra Random House. 271 pp. $24.95 Tony Hendra will always occupy a warm spot in my heart because of his hilarious (and uncanny) imitation of John Lennon on "Magical Misery Tour," one of the selections on National Lampoon's 1972 LP Radio Dinner. Hendra was one of the founders of National Lampoon, and he recounts both his days there and how the Lennon send-up came about in Father Joe. But only in passing. For this is definitely not your usual show-biz memoir. True, by starting off with an account of how...