Apology Thread

7/23/2010 | vbmoneyspender

[vbmoneyspender]

In the old days, when someone wanted you to apologize it was for something you had done to them. And the way it worked was they would ask you for an apology and you would tell them to go screw themselves. But we live in a new age where apologies are done differently. Nowadays, the way apologies work is that you demand that someone you don't personally know apologize to someone else that you don't personally know. This is another form of modern outsourcing and, as such, has become quite the rage in the more technologically sophisticated areas of the United States.

As a result, in order to keep up with the times, I am creating this Apology Thread and starting it off with my own demands for apologies from people I have never met. First, I demand that George Lucas apologize to Star Wars fans for writing and directing Stars Wars Episodes 1, 2 and 3 and that he further apologize to movie fans in general for producing Howard the Duck. Second, I demand that Norm Coleman apologize to the good people of the state of Minnesota for losing to Al Franken in the 2008 senatorial race. And because this race had national implications, Norm Coleman may want to consider expanding his apology to include the citizens of all these United States. Third, I demand that Madonna apologize to Kabbalah worshippers for joining their religion and thereby making a mockery of it.

Now that I have issued my apology demands, I would like to invite my fellow freepers to issue their own apology demands to people they don't know.

And lastly, because I don't want this post to end on a purely negative note, I would like to personally thank Mitchell Mortaza for founding the Women's Lingerie Football League. Mitchell, if you are reading this, I just want to say "Never Give Up! Never Surender!"

[Quix]

I got a kick out of it, too.

Just not a priority for me to play at the moment.

Thx.

[Clay Moore]

Hey, I like posting that picture. I demand an apology.

[metmom]

Now THERE’s an idea for border security.

[mad_as_he$$]

I demand an apology from Metallica for St. Anger and about everything since then.

[Colonel_Flagg]

Second, I demand that Norm Coleman apologize to the good people of the state of Minnesota for losing to Al Franken in the 2008 senatorial race. And because this race had national implications, Norm Coleman may want to consider expanding his apology to include the citizens of all these United States.

Norm Coleman did not lose the election, so no apology from him is necessary.

[Erasmus]

That he has multiple personalities is not so troubling as the fact that every one of them is repulsive.

[Danae]

Yea.... but what about “Throw Momma from the Train”?

LOL

[Nervous Tick]

>> The person that created the vuvuzela (or whatever it’s called) should apologize to the whole world.

And only AFTER the apology do we call in the proctologist to extract that six-pack of ‘em.

[humblegunner]

I apologize for not getting on this thread earlier.

[SierraWasp]

"an apology bank......somebody has got to be on this idea ready right?"

Yeah! We could call it "Sap & Trade!"

[Vendome]

Buenos Dias, Senior Word Smith.

(just wondering if this thread can go all weekend. Great concept)

[cardinal4]

I demand the Carnahans of Missouri apologizing for stealing the Show me State’s oxygen..

[glock rocks]

LMAO... now that's sorry!

[Xenalyte]

Oh, hell. I demand that you apologize for posting that. I have not laughed so hard in days! My ribs hurt so apologize now, dammit.

[Alamo-Girl]

LOLOL! Thanks for the ping!

[Vendome]

LOL.

Sorry for laughing.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

[cardinal4]

stick bundler

LOL!!

[Congressman Billybob]

White shoes and a white belt are an outfit of their own, with a name. That is called a “full Cleveland.” While we're on the subject, someone needs to apologize for Cleveland.

John / Billybob

[expatguy]

[expatguy]

I'm sorry.... NOT !