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Humor (General/Chat)

Brevity: Headers | « Text »
  • Random Saturday Musings.....

    11/03/2012 6:57:06 AM PDT · by Lazamataz · 48 replies
    Nov 3, 2012 | By Laz A. Mataz
    Daylight Savings this weekend. We get an extra hour of sleep. BUT IS THIS ALL IT IS? OR IS THIS A NEFARIOUS PLOT BY THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION TO DELAY THE ELECTION BY AN HOUR???!??!??!????!???!???!?! WOW! So, I went to 3rd Street. Warehouse Tire is an empty warehouse. I got mugged, then carjacked. But like the note said, I'm doing the same to the next total stranger. Now to make a few Free Republic account adjustments.... Account >> My Preferences >> Obama Loses Election THERE. Much better. Confucius say, “Woman who thinks way to man’s heart through his stomach misses...
  • How Women Burn Calories in France

    11/03/2012 6:42:46 AM PDT · by navysealdad · 14 replies
    Video Commercial how women burn calories in France.
  • Today's Toons 11/2/12

    11/02/2012 5:54:41 PM PDT · by pookie18 · 12 replies
    The Right Reasons ^ | 11/2/12 | pookie18
    Click on link.
  • Caption Campaigner in Chief

    11/02/2012 2:24:37 PM PDT · by Lucky9teen · 14 replies
    U.S. President Barack Obama (L) and New Jersey Governor Chris Christie talk to survivors of Hurricane Sandy in a community center while touring damaged areas in Brigantine, New Jersey, October 31, 2012 but then a day later... U.S. President Obama smiles at a campaign event in Green Bay, Wisconsin November 1, 2012 U.S. President Barack Obama greets supporters after speaking at a campaign event at Cheyenne Sports Complex in Las Vegas, Nevada November 1, 2012 A cardboard cut out of President Barack Obama is seen in a room where volunteer workers work the phone bank at the AFL-CIO building in...
  • Today's Toons 11/1/12

    11/02/2012 2:21:51 PM PDT · by pookie18 · 8 replies
    The Right Reasons ^ | 11/1/12 | pookie18
    Click on link.
  • The 5 Craziest Presidential Ads of All Time

    11/02/2012 12:02:05 PM PDT · by JoeDetweiler · 12 replies ^ | 10-30-2012 | Mark Hill
    "It's 20 seconds of a guy laughing hysterically at a TV showing the name of Nixon's VP candidate, Spiro Agnew. The "joke" is that Agnew was an obscure politician, but it seems safer to vote for an unknown than a candidate supported by what sounds like a James Bond supervillain who just finished announcing his plan to blow up the White House with a space laser. See how far we've come? Laughing at a candidate's name used to be the strategy of one of the most successful commercial makers in history. Now it's the strategy of Free Republic."
  • Canada Beefing Up Border Patrol In Event Romney Wins Presidential Election

    11/02/2012 11:54:12 AM PDT · by LucianOfSamasota · 19 replies
    The Global Edition ^ | Oct 6, 2012 | Jello Marx
    CANADA, (The Global Edition) — Governor Romney’s surprising victory in first Presidential debate between President Obama and the Governor has had a surprising effect on the United State’s neighbors to the north, North American media reports. The border police gave out a warning about “a flood of American liberals seen sneaking across the border into Canada“... SNIP...Media outlets report that the possibility of a Romney Presidency has prompted the exodus among left-leaning citizens who fear they’ll soon be required to “hold down a job, hunt, pray, and agree with Bill O’Reilly.” SNIP... According to well-informed sources, “liberals need so much...
  • CAPTION TIME: Our Dear Leader in command

    11/02/2012 8:12:26 AM PDT · by McGruff · 24 replies
    HumanEvents ^ | 11/02/2012 | you
    I know people are hurting but let's relief some stress. Add your caption.

    11/02/2012 5:46:36 AM PDT · by Lucky9teen · 54 replies
      "After the last debate, experts agreed that President Obama won on substance and I thought: Well, big deal, Lance Armstrong won on several substances." -David Letterman  "Experts say the entire 2012 election could come down to just eight states. The states are: confusion, dismay, depression, apathy, shock, disbelief, despair, and anxiety. Those are the eight states." -Jay Leno "Don't ask, don't tell" is back. Not for gays in the military — it's President Obama's new policy for questions about Libya." ~ Jay Leno   "Republicans are accusing the White House of successfully engineering a massive cover-up of the Libyan...
  • From a 14 year old art student...

  • Today's Toons 10/31/12

    11/02/2012 1:28:45 AM PDT · by pookie18 · 7 replies
    The Briefing Room ^ | 10/31/12 | pookie18
    Click on link.
  • The College Football Czar: Week 10

    11/01/2012 7:51:15 PM PDT · by Daniel Clark · 5 replies
    The Shinbone: The Frontier of the Free Press ^ | November 1, 2012 | Daniel Clark
    The College Football Czar Week 10 Week nine in review: As this issue goes to print, there remain massive power outages on the Eastern seaboard due to Hurricane Sandy. Naturally, this poses the potential for some of this weekend’s games to be postponed or canceled, although there is no known instance of such at this time. Honestly, the College Football Czar had fully intended to pick Oklahoma over Notre Dame, and he has no idea what possessed him to type in Notre Dame as the winner, but the published pick is the published pick, and the clairvoyant Broward County canvassing...
  • Nate Silver-Intrade Poll Obama 82.35% Romney 16.93% MoE 1.8%

    11/01/2012 6:36:15 PM PDT · by Perdogg · 26 replies
    Breaking from a bathhouse in NYC, Nate Silver released his first poll in cooperation with Intrade betting site. He predicted with 99.9998% certainty that Obama would win all 538 Electoral Votes from all 57 states. He also said with 116.342% certainty that Obama would win the 2016 Republican and Democrat nomination and run unopposed.
  • Today's Toons 10/30/12

    11/01/2012 5:01:07 PM PDT · by pookie18 · 26 replies
    We have power...woo-hoo! Click on link.
  • Amy's Place ... Poetry and Potpourri ... November, 2012

    10/31/2012 10:23:31 PM PDT · by JustAmy · 1,008 replies
    11-1-2012 | JustAmy; St.Louie1; MamaBear; Billie; Meg33, Friends
    Welcome To.... 'Amy's Place' welcomes all poets and those who enjoy poetry.'Amy's Place' is more than just about poetry.Come in, relax, and share with fellow FReepersyour thoughts about any of the things on the *Menu*. Enjoy! :) Never Forget! Bad Penny Amy's personal guardian ~ the ever charming, lovable, huggable, LouieWolf Many thanks for stopping by. : )
  • Tin Leftists and Obama's Coming (Vanity)

    10/31/2012 7:39:55 PM PDT · by 50sDad · 4 replies
    My own Twisted Mind ^ | 10/31/12 | 50sdad
    Tin Leftists and Obama’s coming, In the booth you’re on your own. This November the truth I see, Four dead in Benghazi. Gotta get truth through it Al Queda gun’d them down Should have been marines to go. What if you saw it Like the Prez did, going down? How can you sleep when you know? Word was never given; Our leader was laying them down. Should have been out long ago. What if you knew them And found them dead on the ground? How can you sleep when you know? Grim Leftists and Obama’s coming; When you vote you’re...
  • Caption Obama and Christie

    10/31/2012 4:10:46 PM PDT · by Lucky9teen · 52 replies
    Photo: On Marine One, President Obama and Governor Christie survey the damage caused by Hurricane Sandy along New Jersey coast, Oct. 31, 2012.
  • All New South Park: Episode 1613: A Scause for Applause

    10/31/2012 11:55:54 AM PDT · by EveningStar · 4 replies
    South Park Studios ^ | October 31, 2012 | Trey Parker and Matt Stone
    A serious doping scandal shakes everyone's faith on an all-new episode of "South Park" titled "A Scause for Applause" premiering Wednesday, October 31 at 10:00 p.m. ET/PT on Comedy Central. Rocked by the recent news of drug use by a beloved icon, the world is left feeling lost and betrayed. The boys, join with the rest of the nation, and remove their yellow wristbands. Everyone is on board, except for Stan, who just can’t seem to cut off his bracelet.
  • Obama Blames Hurricane On Video

    HOBOKEN, NJ -- While touring New Jersey today, President Barack Obama blamed the damage cause by the hurricane on a video forecast that was posted late last week on The Weather Channel. Obama went on to apologize profusely to the Atlantic Ocean for the incendiary nature of the video. He vowed to track down those who created the video and bring them to justice. He also promised quick reaction, proclaiming “We leave nobody behind." Secretary of State Hillary Clinton strongly denounced both the video posted on the Internet and Weather Channel that is rousing the angry ocean throughout the Northeast....
  • BREAKING NEWS: Obama blames hurricane on a video posted on the Weather Channel

    10/31/2012 5:24:19 AM PDT · by Bulwinkle · 19 replies
    BREAKING NEWS: Obama blames hurricane on a video posted on the Weather Channel HOBOKEN, NJ -- While touring New Jersey today, President Barack Obama blamed the damage cause by the hurricane on a video forecast that was posted late last week on The Weather Channel. Obama went on to apologize profusely to the Atlantic Ocean for the incendiary nature of the video. He vowed to track down those who created the video and bring them to justice. He also promised quick reaction, proclaiming “We leave nobody behind."
  • Irvine woman wants roadside memorial to honor fish killed in truck crash.

    10/31/2012 2:53:15 AM PDT · by carriage_hill · 46 replies
    Fox News ^ | Published October 30, 2012 | AP
    <p>IRVINE, Calif. – An Orange County woman has asked the city of Irvine to erect a sign honoring hundreds of truck crash victims -- who were fish.</p> <p>About 1,600 pounds of saltwater bass died on Oct. 11 when a container truck hauling them to market got into a three-way crash.</p>
  • President Obama’s Halloween Message 2012

    10/30/2012 10:54:23 PM PDT · by garjog · 26 replies
    White House ^ | October 31, 2012 | Barak Obama
    President Obama’s Halloween Message White House, October 31, 2012 Good morning. This Halloween we are reminded of the hardship suffering by victims of the hurricane that has ravished the east coast. Our hearts go out to all who are in need. At this difficult moment it is good to pause and celebrate the American tradition of giving and receiving. Nearly 500 years ago, the people of Scotland set aside this evening as All-Hallows-Even, that is, the night before All Hallows Day. Since then, the ancestors of Americans have looked for inspiration in the giving and receiving of treats on this...
  • Obamacronium,the Densest Element discovered by Scientist 2012

    10/30/2012 5:01:27 PM PDT · by NamVet71MP · 1 replies ^ | 9/3/2012 | BlessGodforever
    The Denest Element yet know to science has been discovered. "Obamacronium" Incredible new discovery that scientist believe is the Darkest Matter known to mankind.
  • Ahmadinejad calling

    10/30/2012 9:23:47 AM PDT · by Former Fetus
    Jewish World Review ^ | 10/30/2012 | Tom Purcell
    Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad phones President Obama's private line. Obama answers. "Why are you calling me, Ahmadinejad? You know we're not ready for one-on-one talks." "But Mahmoud and the mullahs worried about American election! We worry Obama will lose!" "I'm not going to lose, you nut job. People love me here. I give them other people's money." "But Mahmoud think Romney use Iran to score big points in debate. He scare people into thinking Iran developing nuclear weapons and that you not do enough to stop us!" "That's not true. My sanctions are killing your economy and if anyone knows...
  • Biden Debates Biden

    10/30/2012 5:04:15 AM PDT · by navysealdad · 4 replies
    Vice-president Joe Biden debates himself
  • Today's Toons 10/29/12

    10/29/2012 3:46:19 AM PDT · by pookie18 · 28 replies
    The Right Reasons ^ | 10/29/12 | pookie18
    Click on link. (Warning: Should hurricane Sandy knock out power, I’ll be back...when I’ll be back...)
  • Lindsay Lohan wants to know why everyone is panicing over a hurricane (humor break)

    10/28/2012 7:09:52 PM PDT · by markomalley · 44 replies
    Twitchy ^ | 10/28/12
    There are no words.

    10/28/2012 4:33:46 PM PDT · by dynachrome · 23 replies
    youtube ^ | 9-13-12 | Angie Griffin and Chad Nikolaus
    Help! Teh gangnam song has infiltrated my brain via the Internutz!
  • Caution: Do Not Swallow!

    10/28/2012 7:11:56 AM PDT · by NamVet71MP · 16 replies ^ | 10/26/12 | kookybuy
  • Has Obama

    10/27/2012 4:17:01 PM PDT · by al baby · 31 replies
    Vanity | Today | Self
    Has Obama ordered any placards for the podium that say Office of President Re Elect yet ?
  • Steven Crowder parodies Lena Dunham’s “Your First Time” Obama ad

    10/27/2012 9:04:20 AM PDT · by CityCenter · 16 replies
    The Right Scoop ^ | 10/27/12 | Steven Crowder
    This was just laying in wait to be mocked.
  • Clinton vs.Obama

    10/26/2012 5:14:35 PM PDT · by rustyboots · 5 replies
    Reading the comments about how Bill Clinton might be hurting President Obama brought a delightful thought to my mind. I started thinking just how entertaining it will be after Romney defeats President Obama to sit back and watch the fight between Clinton and the Obama to see who is the top dog in the Democratic party? Can't wait to see the back stabbing, bushwhacking, and just plain gutter fighting these 4 people will engage in. I would bet President Obama's grades, birth certificate and anything else he wants to stay hidden will appear within 6 months. And what new low...
  • Hilariously Scary Halloween Prank: Gotta-See Video

    10/26/2012 1:45:36 PM PDT · by Red Badger · 12 replies ^ | 10-26-2012 | Staff
    Many people claim Halloween as their favorite time of the year. Around the end of October pranks and scares become as common as fools in April. The best pranks are the ones with just enough complexity to keep the watches guessing. Here a magician, prankster and mentalist Rich Ferguson tests out his head drop prank on the unsuspecting residents of San Luis Obispo, California. The results range from laughter to fear, and even watching the trick is top notch. Can you guess how he does it? via YouTube
  • Harley Marine -- how the press sees the good guys

    10/26/2012 12:51:25 PM PDT · by JoeA
    Unknown | 10/26/12 | Unknown
    A friend sent this to me, and I think it's worth sharing. A Harley biker is riding by the zoo in Washington, DC, when he sees a little girl leaning into the lion's cage. Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the collar of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to slaughter her, under the eyes of her screaming parents. The biker jumps off his Harley, runs to the cage and - Pow! - hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch. Whimpering from the pain, the lion lets go of the girl. The biker brings...
  • Goldberg: "My room smells Like Axelrod"

    10/26/2012 12:17:55 PM PDT · by pabianice · 8 replies
    The Goldberg File (NRO email - no link) | 10/26/12 | Goldberg
    Dear Reader (and those of you who subscribe to this "news"letter just for the exotic punctuation), I need to keep this quick. I'm writing this from a sort of lounge area on the sixth floor of the Water Tower Inn. This is a hotel in St. Louis that used to be a hospital and sort of still is. If you've spent much time in hospitals, you know that they are battlegrounds for the war between the medicinal scents and various human odors. My room smells a bit like David Axelrod these days, by which I mean it has the vague...
  • AFL-CIO Puts Out List Of Union-Approved Candy For Halloween

    10/26/2012 6:56:50 AM PDT · by Old Sarge · 28 replies
    AFL-CIO ^ | Oct 25, 2012 | Unknown
    If you live in a progressive neighborhood and don’t want your house TPed this Halloween, you better check to make sure you bought the right candy. The AFL-CIO has just put out a list of “union-made” Halloween Candy, and Snickers and Twix eaters are out of luck.

    10/26/2012 6:04:06 AM PDT · by Lucky9teen · 103 replies
    One witch told another witch, "I want one of those new computers that has a spell checker." Don't bother inviting the Invisible Man to your Halloween party. He won't show up. Sometimes he makes excuses, but they're all transparent. A photographer goes to a haunted castle determined to get a picture of a ghost. The ghost he encounters turns out to be friendly and poses for a snapshot. The happy photographer dashes to his studio, develops the film and…learns that the photos are underexposed and completely blank.Moral to the story: The spirit is willing, but the flash is weak....
  • Today's Toons 10/26/12

    10/26/2012 1:48:32 AM PDT · by pookie18 · 14 replies
    The Right Reasons ^ | 10/26/12 | pookie18
    Click on link.
  • The College Football Czar: Week 9

    10/25/2012 8:07:07 PM PDT · by Daniel Clark · 5 replies
    The Shinbone: The Frontier of the Free Press ^ | October 25, 2012 | Daniel Clark
    The College Football Czar Week 9 Week eight in review: It was another above-average week for the College Football Czar, who went 14-4, improving his overall record to 106-50 and his winning percentage to .679. Among his better picks were the demise of the then-undefeated but badly inflated Cincinnati Bearcats, and Louisiana-Monroe’s 43-42 overtime win over Western Kentucky (predicted score 33-32). Although week eight certainly had its share of excitement, it did very little to shake up the rankings. The highest-ranked team to lose to a lower-ranked or unranked opponent was the #21 Bearcats, whose defeat is referenced above. #24...
  • Freeper Challenge To Make A Post-Election Vid. (Vanity, of course)

    10/25/2012 7:33:49 PM PDT · by RushIsMyTeddyBear · 6 replies
    YouTube ^ | 10/25/2012 | moi
    I know I'm 'counting the chickens before they hatch, here........but I would LOVE if some FReepers could make an Election Day vid using this. It would be EPIC! 'Cause this is what I'll be singing when Obama is DEFEATED!!!!!! Would like to have it 'tucked away'. I know you guys LOVE a challenge! <3 Have at it and LOVE you guys!!!!! FR keeps my sanity!
  • Benghazi Scandal.Not One Peep From Pelosi,Reid,&Holder?,Where Are They Hiding?

    10/25/2012 5:22:58 PM PDT · by Who_Ate_My_Dog · 5 replies
    And remember way back when where we were all laughing&ridiculing "Queen Pelosi" who wanted vengeance on the GOP over the water-boarding debacle? And here we are 3 years later,all hell breaks loose in the mid-east,four Americans are killed on Obama's watch (Commander In Chief?),and has anyone noticed that we have not heard from any of the Democrat Leaders? Well regarding Price Harry,he probably ran off to Vegas to "Rig The Machines". But you have to look at the whole picture. The Democrats have caused this incident that has affected our National Security! And all of our Liberal Leaders are running/hiding...
  • A Bad Lip Reading of the First 2012 Debate

    10/25/2012 5:16:29 PM PDT · by navysealdad · 2 replies
    "Eye Of The Sparrow" — A Bad Lip Reading of the First 2012 Debate
  • ‘You Potato Brains’: ‘Bad Lip Reading’ Finally Does a Joe Biden Edition (Content Warning!)

    10/25/2012 4:16:53 PM PDT · by mojito · 6 replies
    The Blaze ^ | 4/16/2012 | Scott Baker/Bad Lip Reading
    The crew at Bad Lip Reading is back. You knew they would get around to Joe Biden eventually. One caution — there are a moderate-to-high number of sexual jokes in this one:
  • Obama's received support from dictators around the world!

    10/25/2012 10:12:18 AM PDT · by Wolf13 · 8 replies ^ | 10/25/12 | wolf13
    Obama's secured the dictator vote...does he have yours?
  • Today's Toons 10/25/12

    10/25/2012 3:35:40 AM PDT · by pookie18 · 15 replies
    The Right Reasons ^ | 10/25/12 | pookie18
    Click on link.
  • Occupy Albany Insists Movement Isn't Dead, Proves It By Holding 5-Person Yoga Class in a McDonald's

    10/24/2012 4:30:50 PM PDT · by rustyweiss74 · 10 replies
    Mental Recession ^ | 10/24/2012
    This past Sunday, remnants of what is left of the Occupy Albany movement celebrated their one-month Anniversary by tying up traffic and insisting that they were "taking it to the man". Who that man is, is anybody's guess. A report from WNYT-Albany showed protesters insisting that despite a meager number of participants in the historic one-year march, the movement was far from dead. “As the capacity of an organizer, it never left. It’s not dead. It’s alive and well. It’s just that most of the organizers like myself, had school to do,” said Eddie Alkubari. It's not dead. It's alive...
  • All New South Park: Episode 1612 "A Nightmare on Face Time"

    10/24/2012 4:18:36 PM PDT · by EveningStar · 10 replies
    South Park Studios ^ | October 24, 2012 | Trey Parker and Matt Stone
    Randy keeps Stan from trick or treating on an all-new episode of "South Park" titled "A Nightmare on Face Time," premiering tonight, Wednesday, October 24 at 10:00 p.m. ET/PT on Comedy Central. The boys are all ready to dress up as their favorite foursome, the Avengers, for Halloween. After months of planning their costumes, at the last minute Randy tells Stan he can’t go trick or treating with his friends. Instead, Stan has to pitch in and help his father with a new business venture.
  • White House Dismisses Benghazi Emails As Spam

    The White House pushed back against reports in Fox, CBS, Reuters and CNN that they knew immediately that the attack in Benghazi was the work of terrorists. "There was a variety of miss information coming in," White House press secretary Jay Carney said Wednesday on Air Force One. "The whole point of our intelligence community is to take facts and refigure them to prove our point. We assess strands of information and make judgments to make the President look good." "This is an open source, unclassified email about a posting on a Facebook site," Carney said. "I would also note...
  • I Found The Internet Off Button

    10/24/2012 10:50:47 AM PDT · by OneVike · 51 replies
    GATE ^ | 10/24/12 | Chuck Wolk
    Ever wonder what happens to the internet after you log off? I bet it never crossed your mind that even though you logged off the internet, your computer is still vulnerable. Yes, if you fail to actually turn the internet off first before you log off, you are leaving your pc's hard drive vulnerable to being hacked. It doesn't happen to everyone, but it does happen enough. Imagine all the vital information you have on your computer that someone could steal. Well, very few people know about this, but there is an OFF button (off button below) that needs...
  • Boston Globe Coverage of Libyan Email Scandal

    10/24/2012 7:43:44 AM PDT · by pabianice · 9 replies
    In-depth coverage of the breaking scandal revealing the White House knew of terror attack within two hours.